


The Dark Moon Rises

by AnyaVoss



Series: Star Wars Dark Moon Series [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Reylo trash, Eventual Romance, F/M, Love/Hate, Possible smut, Sexual Tension, Slow Build, Slow Burn, wait... definite smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2018-07-27 16:33:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 75,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7625902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnyaVoss/pseuds/AnyaVoss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Picks up after The Force Awakens.  Rey has completed her training on Ach-to under Master Luke, and now travels by his side as his padawan.  The two are desperately seeking information on the First Order's newest weapon- the Dark Moon. After encountering the Knights of Ren on an uncharted planet, Rey is abducted by Kylo Ren who plans to turn her to the dark side...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Haunted

**Author's Note:**

> Look, I'm sorry about this. 
> 
> I watched the Force Awakens when it came out last year, and fell headfirst into the Reylo trash bin, though until recently, I had no idea there even was a Reylo trash bin. I bought the DVD last month, watched it again, saw him carrying her off, and thought, 'Holy Crap, I cannot be the only one seeing what's going on here!' Sure enough, the world's fastest google search confirmed that I was not. I spent the next three nights absorbed in fanfic, and the next thing I knew... it was like I couldn't stop it... I just started typing and...
> 
> Well, here are the results so far. I confess that I have never written fan fiction, never posted stories anywhere, never even read it before a week ago. I have no idea what I'm doing, so if I need certain tags that I don't have, or I'm doing something wrong, or the story is terrible, I humbly apologize in advance.

 

_“You were ordered to bring the girl… to me!”_

_In the vastness of the dark chamber, a single, weak, ray of light shone down, creating an uneven circle of grey upon the floor. There was something beyond the light—something as large as the dark, and it hissed as it spoke again:_

_“Do you need to be reminded of what happens when you disobey?”_

_She sucked in a breath of stale air. The memory of pain flashed through her body, causing an involuntary shudder. She knew what would happen. She knew exactly what he could do._

_“I was… too weak,” she murmured, and with horror, moved to cover her mouth. The voice that issued from it was not her own. The voice she spoke with was—_

_“Yes,” hissed the darkness, “you are too weak, and too uncertain, and too… afraid, but when I am done with you, there will be nothing left but the dark… the powerful, unyielding dark.”_

_Beyond the light, something moved. She opened her mouth to scream as a withered, rotting hand rose from the dark, and stretched its fingers toward her._

_“You will learn, and pain… will again, be your teacher!”_

_Crackling ropes of blue fire shot from the hand and arched toward her, striking her body in multiple places, and as it burned and paralyzed her body she opened her mouth again, and a scream issued forth, the deep scream of a man in unendurable pain._

 

With a gasp, Rey jerked upright and reflexively threw her arms around herself. It took a few seconds for her to realize that she was not being tortured by an invisible enemy, and a few seconds more to remember where she was.

The wind had picked up again.  It raced over the flat, barren expanse of muddy wasteland, and in the distance, where it encountered the only obstacle to its progress, the walled city of Ka'vec, it whistled and moaned its discontent.  The sound made Rey think of ghost stories she had heard as a child, and she shivered reflexively.

The wookie gave a soft cry. He was stretched out on the ground nearby, and in the dying firelight, Rey could see that his eyes were open and watching her.

“I’m alright,” she answered. “Bad dream.”

He could have stayed behind on the Falcon, and she had told him as much, but Chewie rarely left her side these days. After delivering her to Luke on Ahch-To, Chewie had returned to D’Qar and placed himself and the Falcon at General Organa’s service, but there had never been enough work to do or missions to fly to keep his loneliness at bay. Chewie missed Han, and though he never spoke of it to Rey, she could feel his hurt and his anger whenever he was near.

When he returned to Ahch-To, ordered to escort both her and Master Luke back to the Resistance Base, he had greeted her warmly, with a hug and a few pats on the head, and ever since had followed wherever she went— a self-assigned body guard. Rey didn’t object. He was lonely, and she understood him, and besides, she had long since learned that it was never wise to argue with a wookiee.

“Where’s Master Luke?” she asked, noticing the empty bedroll on the other side of the fire.

Chewie lifted his hand to indicate the sharply-inclined, mud slope they had sheltered behind, and whined low in his throat.

“You’re right,” she agreed. “No one’s getting much sleep tonight.”

Rey threw back her blanket and reached for her saber, recognizing that she no longer felt comfortable when she was awake and it did not hang at her side.

“Stay here,” she said, “I’ll be back.”

Scrambling up the muddy hill as stealthily as she could, Rey reached the crest, and rubbed the muck from her hands on large, flat rock. Master Luke stood on the other side, facing something she could not see.

“Can’t sleep, Master?” she asked jumping up on the rock and crossing it to drop gracefully down beside him.

Master Luke did not react. He had probably known she was approaching from the time she left her bed. Standing beside him, she could see the walled city of Ka’vec spread out far below. The red and purple lights of the night district reflected from the stone walls, casting the entire city in a pinkish sort of glow.

Ka’vec was a city of outlaws, on an abandoned planet, in the outer rim territories—and this was always the case with Master Luke. It was never to beautiful, lush, pleasure planets that he took his padawan. No, their missions were always to meet with dangerous people in forbidding places where secrets were whispered in exchange for money or favors.

Although the First Order had suffered devastating losses after the destruction of Starkiller Base, they had been quick to regroup. There was already a new menace to the decimated Republic. A new weapon which no one had ever seen and no one could describe—though many of the Resistance fighters had witnessed the aftermath of its use—Rey included. She still remembered walking though the smoldering ruins of Affa Bal Zid. Not a single living being remained—only corpses. A city of dead bodies which looked to have died while fighting each other—though some appeared to have ended themselves. Cities of dead bodies continued to be found, and still they had no explanation for it.

The bounty hunter that Master Luke had tracked to Abafar had called the weapon ‘Dark Moon’, but had either been unable or unwilling to tell them anything other than the name of a prostitute whom he had heard if from. The bounty hunter had subsequently died when a pack of void striders had apparently gone mad, surrounded the poor man, and ripped him to shreds with their beaks. Strangely enough, void striders were not an aggressive species, and there had never been an attack before or since on record.

“He’s close,” Master Luke whispered, nodding his head.

“Who?” Rey asked, though she knew the answer.

“I can feel his pain… and I think that you can too,” he answered.

Kylo Ren. The leader of the Knights of Ren. The monster who had murdered his own father, and almost destroyed Master Luke by slaughtering his young students.

“I don’t care about his pain!” Rey hissed, wrapping her hand around the hilt of her light saber as though it could comfort her.

For a while, Master Luke said nothing, he merely watched the glowing lights of Ka’vec as they bobbed against a strong breeze. It would rain again soon. It always rained on this particular wasteland of a planet, and when it fell on your skin it burned a little. Nothing grew around Ka’vec, it was a void of flat, muddy stretches of land. The city was built of stones dug from the fields of mud, and during the day, looked to be almost abandoned as the rest of the planet.

“In the old days, the Jedi Academy would only train younglings—children who were little more than babes. Do you know why?” Master Luke asked.

“So that they weren’t poisoned by the Dark—by things like fear, and anger,” Rey recited.

“Fear, or anger… or love. A Jedi must not have such things as familial attachments, or loyalties to individuals. The younger they were taken from their homes—the better it was thought to be for them.”

Rey stayed silent at this. It seemed cruel to her, but Master Luke never spoke without having a point to make, and she wanted to know where he was going.

“My nephew was born at a time when there was no Jedi Academy. He began to show great potential from the earliest age.  We could all see it—even Han, but it was a problem we always put off to a later time. There was so much to do, so much to rebuild, so many fights to finish—and I was the only true Jedi—the last. Even after we rebuilt the Jedi Academy on Yavin 4, my sister believed that it would be better if she could teach him to suppress it. After all, she had done so herself for many years, but my nephew and his power… were a resource that the Dark desperately wanted. When Leia refused to train him in the Light, she unknowingly opened him up to the Dark.”

“But she loved him!” Rey insisted, angered that any blame for Kylo Ren might be leveled at the General. “He was surrounded by family, by people who loved him! What makes a boy turn to the Dark when has a family, and love, and sh—“

“The Dark Side doesn’t tempt us with pain or death… not at the beginning. The Dark Side sees our desires and offers them to us as gifts.”

“And what gift could it have offered to Kylo Ren that he didn’t already have?” Rey demanded.

“When the boy was still very young, and Leia still a respected presence in the Senate, there was a plot against her life. A young Twi’lek, a slave girl belonging to an old and powerful ally of the Empire, approached her on her way to the Senate and tried to stab her. The girl was acting on orders from her master, and was only a weak threat at best, but my nephew…” Luke’s words trailed off as though he could see the events unfolding before him.

“My nephew raised his hand to her, and in an instant, snapped her neck and flung her body aside without ever touching her. He thought his mother would be pleased with him. Leia was terrified. She saw our father in him, and realized that in allowing him to form attachments to his family, she had opened a path to the dark side in him.”

“How would a little boy know to do such a thing?” Rey asked. “Where would he learn to use the Force in such a way, if he was only ever taught to suppress it?”

“Snoke,” Luke said, his voice barely above a whisper. “We didn’t know it then, of course, but Snoke had already found him, was already speaking to him through the Force.”

“So she sent him to you,” Rey surmised.

“She did. She sent him to me, and he did not want to go. He thought it was punishment. He thought his mother no longer wanted him, that she feared him and sought to hurt him. And his father-- he blamed his father the most. He believed that if Han had been there, he could have prevented the whole incident. If his father had been there to protect his mother, that he would never have had to use the Force. When he arrived at the newly established Jedi Praxeum on Yavin 4, he was a volatile combination of rage and misery, but I tried, Rey. So help me, I tried.”

“You did your best Master Luke,” she soothed.

She had never heard him speak of Kylo Ren before, and had respected his silence by never asking.

As a Jedi she knew that she should have compassion for all living things, but Kylo Ren surely, was a being beyond the reach of compassion. Even knowing what had started his transformation did not inspire her pity.

“I don’t know,” he whispered. “I just don’t know.”

Below them, the red and purple lights of the night district began to wink out as far to the east, the sun began its slow ascent in the hazy sky.

“Wake up the wookiee,” Master Luke ordered. “It’s time to go.”


	2. Ka'vec

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still with me? Great. Here goes nothing:

Ka’vec in the light of early morning, reminded Rey of when she kicked over a rock on Jakku.  Once exposed to the sunlight, all the slimy grubs clinging to the bottom of the rock, squirmed and slithered away to bury themselves in the sand.  In Ka’vec, the slimy grubs squinted in the sunlight and drew hoods down over their faces before hurrying from the last open doors in the night district to wherever they took cover in the daytime.

With their hoods and long cloaks, they blended in with the rabble-- with the exception of Chewie. of course. He was dead set against clothing of any kind, and had reminded her earlier that his bowcaster afforded him far better protection than a cloak anyhow.

Master Luke walked as though he knew exactly where he was going, and perhaps he did.  In all their travels together, Rey had never seen him lose his way.  There must have been a time when he traveled a great deal, for he carried no maps with him.

As the streets emptied around them, they came to a square bordered on all sides with long ropes hung with the red and purple lanterns they had seen from afar.  Their colors were dull when unlit.  Master Luke  glanced back over his shoulder and jerked his head slightly.

Understanding his wordless direction, Rey slowed her steps, allowing him to walk several paces ahead as they approached the building.  The scarlet banner above the doorway marked it for a brothel.  As Master Luke stooped to pass through the door, Rey veered left, with Chewie close behind.  The two circled the outer wall until they reached the narrow alleyway behind the structure.  Chewbacca exhaled a short growly sigh.

"It _does_ stink," Rey agreed.  "Nevermind that now, give me a boost up."

There was no back entrance to the building.  A balcony jutted sharply out from the second floor, and with the wookiee's help, Rey was able to get hold of the balustrade and pull herself up.  She ducked through the arched doorway, just as the first drops of stinging rain began to fall, and found herself in an empty bedroom.

But what a bedroom it was!  Swathes of gauzy red fabric looped across the ceiling and ran down the walls to pool upon a floor which was covered in layers of Dwathene-woven rugs.  She could barely take a step without having to kick aside a pillow, and thick clouds of incense created a haze which almost made her eyes water.

Master Luke's voice came from somewhere nearby. Though she couldn't make out the words, she recognized the tone-- calm but firm.  He hadn't found the girl yet then.

Rey crept toward the sound of his voice, shaking her head to clear away the feeling of sleepiness.  There was something off about the incense, some sort of drug in it no doubt.  She paused at the door, listening for her Master, but he had fallen silent.

There was another sound, faint but unmistakable.  The whisper of silk against silk, the soft padding of stealthy footsteps--coming from behind her.

She whirled and reached for her lightsaber as the cold, sharp edge of a knife was pressed to her throat.  A pair of dark eyes, heavily lined in black stared into hers.

"What are you doing here?' the woman hissed.

Rey swallowed hard, and tried to remember her training.

"You don't want to hurt me," she soothed.

"Oh, but I do!  I should like nothing better!" the woman insisted, pressing the knife still harder against Rey's throat.

It was worth a try, but the woman obviously was not one of the weak-willed ones.  Rey changed her tactic.

"I'm lost," she began.

"You're with that one downstairs, I'm not a fool!  What do you want with me?" the woman demanded.

This woman was the one they'd been looking for!  The only being who might know the secret behind the First Order's new weapon.

"There was a bounty hunter named Thracen Bitt, a tall man with a scar across his cheek.  He was a client of yours--"

"I've had lots of men, I don't remember any like that."

"Your name is Amalia, isn't it?  Amalia, and you're from Coruscant originally.  We don't want any trouble.  We're looking for information."

"What sort of information?" she asked.  "I don't give anything away for free, you understand."

The pressure against Rey's throat significantly decreased.  She was able to breathe freely again, though the clouds of incense were still heavy around them.

"Of course not.  We can pay.  My master has--"

"Your master?" the woman hissed and the blade pressed hard against her flesh once again.  A trickle of something that was likely blood, ran down Rey's neck.  "You're jedi, aren't you?  I thought your kind was all gone.  Your time is over now, little jedi, finished and done.  The Republic has been destroyed, or haven't you heard?"

"I've heard," Rey agreed.

"We don't want your kind around here."

"Fine.  We'll leave, after you tell us what you know about Dark Moon."

"Dark... Moon," she whispered, her jet-lined eyes widening.  "The Dark Moon, eh?  That information's worth more than my life to tell you-- get out of here, and take your friend with you."

"Tell me about Dark Moon," Rey insisted, though her words were drowned in the sudden, jarring onset of clanging bells.  First one bell, and then another and another until the whole city seemed to ring with a discordant cacophony of sound.  Warning, the bells cried.  Warning! Something comes!

Rey's captor swore.  The knife fell away from her throat as the strange woman sheathed it, and stumbled backwards, her eyes large with fright.

"What-- what is it?  First Order?" Rey yelled over the ringing bells, but the room was already empty.

Master's Luke's voice cut through the loud, smoky space, and she responded mechanically, drawing her light saber and rushing out the door and down the stairs.

Three men had him surrounded in the tavern-like space, and were advancing on him as the other residents of the building, women of all shapes and species, hurried down the stairs and out the open door into the streets.  From what Rey could see, it was chaos outside.  The city had come to life.  They normally reticent citizens of Ka'vec poured into the street carrying all manner of bags and household goods, all of them fleeing something unseen, stumbling and running through curtains of rain.

"Raiders!" Master Luke called out, answering her unasked questions.

Rey crouched into her a fighting stance.

"I can handle myself.  Go after the girl!" Master Luke ordered.

Rey had no choice but to obey.  Doubtless, he could handle himself, she holstered her weapon and raced through the open door into the street-- immediately finding herself caught in a current of bodies, all rushing for the western gates of the city.

With the destruction of the both the New Republic, and the First order, raiders were once again a growing threat among the more lawless outer planets. She had seen the damage they could and did inflict on such settlements, entire towns looted and its citizens slaughtered.  Clearly, the people of Ka'vec had seen such things or knew of them as well, for their fear was easy to feel.

Rey did not fight the current of bodies.  Wherever they were headed, the girl she sought had certainly gone as well, and so she covered her head with her cloak, and squinted her eyes against the downpour.  The skies had opened up while she was inside and now sheets of burning, acid-like rain poured down on the fleeing masses.  The resulting storm clouds were so vast and dark that it seemed to be night.  The only light came from open doorways, flickering torches, and the frequent cracks of lightening that raced across the sky, hastening the terrified crowds along.

Rey allowed the Force to guide her.  Letting go of her own thoughts and feelings, ignoring even her own body as it was jostled from side to side, she reached out through the clamorous fog of emotions and memories to find the woman.

Outside the city... she was gone out the gates and onto the vast fields of mud which surrounded Ka'vec as far as the eye could see, and which, Rey now understood, hid a secret.  Escape vessels, hundreds of them, were buried only inches beneath the mud, and the fleeing woman was already on her knees, digging with her hands.

It was too late for most of them.  The raiders had landed, and now cut through the crowds like a shockwhip through flesh.  They wore strange armor of a type that Rey didn't recognize.  Strange metal helmets that looked like  large, shallow bowls turned upside-down over the head.  These were very effective in protecting the raiders from the burning rain.  Expecting to be attacked from the side of town where enemy ships had been seen, the citizens had no idea that they were rushing right into a trap.  As they poured through the city gates toward their escape vehicles, they were cut down mercilessly, by the long cruel blades of the raiders.

The masses around her had no idea that they were rushing directly into a trap.  For a moment she forgot the woman-- their only source of information on the First Order and their new weapon, and could feel only the fear and suffering of the people of Ka'vec.  She had to help them.  She would help them.

Rey drew her saber and ignited it.  Those around her, backed away from the glow of her blade, creating a mostly clear path for her to the city gates.

Carnage awaited her there.  As the lightening flashed in the sky, illuminating the field for a single instant, Rey saw bodies.  Bodies strewn across the mud as far as the eye could see, and still the raiders were clearing the plain of those trying to flee, their blades flashing in the rain, whenever the lighting lit up the sky behind them, and with a jolt, Rey remembered the woman whom Master Luke had sent her after-- the prostitute who had threatened her with a knife.

The woman was crouched among the bodies, digging desperately through the mud with her bare hands, and the raiders were near her, and coming closer.  A wicked, curved sword lifted against the sky--

"NOOO!" Rey screamed, and charged.

Her hood fell back, exposing her face the rain.  She swung, and dodged, and swung again, and her opponent collapsed among the bodies, but they had seen her now.  The raiders converged on her, and now she was defending herself as they swung on her.  Two opponents down, then three... and she started to think.. started to believe that she might fight through, that at the very least, she could hold out until Master Luke arrived, when all of a sudden, the ground under her feet seemed to slant, and the world went sideways, and every vein in her body seemed fulled of ice.  Her head throbbed, and her chest burned.

She knew this feeling... knew what it meant.  HE had come, and he was close, very near to her... too near, much too near.  Rey was now the one who must escape.  Master Luke would have felt his old student even before Rey.  He surely knew who was approaching them.  He would count on Rey to retreat back to the Falcon.  She must not fight against Kylo Ren, not yet.

The group of raiders which previously closed her in, had almost cleared, though not by her own doing, most had gone off to fight some new threat, and she could hear the sounds of metal on metal, and men dying over the downpour.  There was only one left now, and he swung with such speed and ferocity that Rey had a difficult time parying his rapid blows.  She swung and stepped back, throwing out her hand to Force-push the pursing raider, but he did not react.  There was no stumble to his step,  and beneath his wide metal hood, it did not appear that he even flinched.

_"Scavenger!"_

Though not spoken aloud, that one word, called out in anger, caught her by surprise, causing her to stumble and thus trip over the body of a fallen raider.  She landed in the mud, and rolled to the side just as the blade came down.

The raider was too fast.  Rey had only narrowly avoided his blow when he raised his sword again.  She glanced up, squinting against the burning, violent rain, a crack of lightening shot across the sky, illuminating the blade that would fall upon her, bringing her end.  She was dead.  At least she would die without a scream or a shout.  She would not show fear.  She was a jedi.

The sword came down... and stopped, as though the raider had frozen solid, and then, a beam of crackling red light erupted from his chest and the man crumpled around the protruding blade of Kylo Ren's lightsaber.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more to come. It's about to get very interesting.


	3. Bound

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey survives the raid on Ka'vec only to find herself in another nightmare.

Again lightening flashed across the sky.

“No,” she whispered. “No, no, no.”  Her lips and tongue burned with the acid taste of the rain.  “No, no, no…”

Kylo Ren ripped his lightsaber free, and the body of the raider fell to the ground with a wet thump.  His mask glinted dully as he advanced upon her.  Behind him, shadowy figures in heavy armor stood imposingly with weapons in hand.  Even without the Force, she would have felt the threat that emanated from them.

The Knights of Ren… they were legendary, mythological almost.  They weren’t supposed to actually exist, but then neither was Master Luke.

Master Luke… it was the memory of his voice which rang in her ears as she lifted her eyes to the inhuman visage of the monster which haunted her dreams, and though his eyes were shielded, she felt certain in that moment that Kylo Ren knew where her thoughts had turned—that he knew and that it angered him.

_“There was still good in my Father.  If the Emperor had any weakness, it was this: that he never understood the nature of mankind… that he did not realize such a duality could exist.  That a feeling like hope might exist beside obedience…”_

Kylo Ren towered over her, his posture tense.  In one hand his crossguard lightsaber blazed unevenly, his other gloved hand curled into a tight fist.  Rey lifted her chin in defiance.  She had come very close to ending his life on Starkiller Base.  Surely, he would now repay her in kind.  She would not give him the satisfaction of seeing her afraid.  She would not even flinch.

He lifted the saber, and with one swift movement brought the hilt crashing down against her skull.

 

*             *             *

 

The storm had stopped, yet her skin still burned where it had been exposed to the rain.  It was silent.  Not in the way of a battlefield after the battle, but the sort of silence that came from traveling through the vast cold dark.  Rey was afraid to open her eyes.  She was afraid to move and thereby learn the extent of her restraint.  Was he there now?  Was he crouched before her waiting for her to open her eyes?

Tentatively, she moved her fingers.  They brushed against cold metal and stopped.

“I know that you’re awake.”

It was his voice— emotionless and distorted through the helmet.

“Why?” Rey rasped, her throat dry and raw

“Why did I save your life?  Because I can make use of you.  Open your eyes, scavenger.”

Rey did so, and found that she lay unbound on the floor of a dimly-lit cabin.  The room held only three other things: a single berth, a chair, and seated upon that chair, a creature in a mask.

Rey swallowed hard, trying to moisten her throat enough to speak.

“Am I to be your guest again?” she whispered.

“No.”  His answer came fast, and though she waited for him to explain, he did not speak again.

Slowly, Rey raised herself up on her elbows and immediately groaned as her head throbbed—a response to the sudden movement.  Her entire skull ached.  She closed her eyes against the pain and forced herself to sit up.  Impassive and unmoving, Kylo Ren continued to study her.

The room was a standard cabin, not a cell, yet she had awoken on the floor beside the bed which suggested she’d been tossed in with little regard for her comfort.  She was not restrained, and yet she was watched.  Though he did not say it, she was most certainly his prisoner.  She swallowed again.

“You can’t keep me here.  I’ll escape… just like last time.”

“I doubt that.”

“I’m stronger now, stronger than I was before—“

“I know.”

His arrogance was apparent in the tone of his voice.  He knew and he didn’t care, and that realization raised gooseflesh down Rey’s arms.

“What do you want from me?” she demanded.

He did not move or respond.

“WHAT DO YOU WANT?” she yelled, her voice breaking.

At last he moved, leaning forward in his chair as though to study her closer.  In the silent room she could hear the creak of leather and the beating of her own heart.

“I want you to do as I say, scavenger.  You will do as I command or you will die.  Do you understand?”  He asked, his modulated voice deceptively soothing.

From habit, Rey’s hand went to her side. Her light saber was gone.  Kylo Ren waited for her answer.  Trapped, she had but one choice.  Rey glanced away from him and gave one quick nod.  The chair creaked again as leaned back.

“Your hands, neck and face were exposed to the rain on Ka’vec and your clothing is soiled with mud.  If you don’t clean it off, the acid will eventually burn through your flesh.  Get up and rinse off.”

Rey opened her mouth to protest that there was no water, but realized she had not seen the entire room from her position on the floor.  She turned to see a doorway behind her which led to a compact washroom.  A shower head extended from the center of its ceiling.

Slowly she got to her feet, and saw that he spoke the truth.  The backs of her hands were red as though sunburned, and her mud-splattered armwraps were peppered in tiny burn holes.

She stepped into the wash compartment and reached for the door panel only to discover that there was none.  A clean grey tunic hung from a hook where the panel should have been.  There was no door separating the shower from the room at all.

Rey stepped back and shook her head.

“I can’t,” she whispered, her hands balling into fists.  “Not in front of you.”

“You will do as I command or you will die,” he repeated.

So that was his plan, she realized, to humiliate her before he tortured or killed her. The very idea of stripping her clothes off and standing naked before such a monster made her sick with loathing.  She hated him. Never, not even on Starkiller Base, had she ever wished she could kill someone as much as she did Kylo Ren at that moment. 

The right moment would come eventually, and she would remember what he did to her.  He would suffer for that, and for Han, and for Master Luke.

Beneath the mask, he scoffed gently.

“I see that your time with Skywalker has had very little effect on you.  That is good.”

Ignoring him, Rey entered the washroom and punched the command in to start the water.  With a smirk, she stepped beneath the steaming spray fully clothed, and began to scrub at her face.

The water stung!

Rey gasped and almost stepped back, but immediately realized that it came from the effect of the water coming into contact with the dried residue on her face and hands.  She grit her teeth and scrubbed harder, and soon a feeling of numbness overtook the burning pain.  She turned her attention to her clothing next, scrubbing at the mud coating her pants and armwraps.  The water which pooled around her toes before finding its way to the drain turned black from her efforts, but her clothing was beyond repair.  The mud had stained and burned holes through every bit of the fabric it touched.

At last Rey gave up and stopped the water.  Dripping wet, she turned to face Kylo Ren and found that he had not moved from his chair.  She shivered in the chill air as she waited for what would come next.

He stood, rising slowly from his chair, and crossed the room in three deliberate steps.  Rey fought the urge to cower.  Standing, he seemed almost too large for the small space.

“Give me your arm,” he drawled.

When she hesitated, he snatched her hand and yanked her arm straight.  He snapped a metal bracelet around her wrist and dropped her arm.  Rey stumbled backwards, eager to be away from him, and wrapped her fingers around the thin metal band.

“I wouldn’t,” he warned.  “That’s a Zygerrian Slave Band.  If you attempt to take it off, you’ll trigger it to release a poison into your skin.  You’ll die before you can take a single step.”

“No,” she whispered.

“Any attempt to dismantle it will result in your death.  It’s also set to trigger should you move more than 2 Trogan from my side.”

Rey removed her fingers from the band.  Her eyes large and wild, she stared first at it, and then looked up into the masked face of the monster, Kylo Ren.

“Ah.  You understand now, don’t you? You can’t escape, scavenger.”

Rey backed slowly away and stopped, afraid to test his words, yet equally afraid of her proximity to the towering creature in black. When he reached out a hand towards her, she stumbled back forgetting the limits set by her wrist band, but he caught her firmly by her shoulder and held her.

“Why are you doing this to me?” she hissed.  “I won’t tell you anything—“

“I know,” he soothed.

Rey felt a drop of warmth run down her cheek as a single terrified tear escaped.  With one glove hand, Kylo Ren reached out to gently cup the side of her face, even as she shrank back and turned her face to the side. He rubbed his thumb slowly across her cheek, wiping the tear away.

“Don’t be afraid,” he said, his voice tranquil and low, “You’ll understand all of this very soon.”

“I understand perfectly well right now.  You’re a monster.”

His hand fell to his side, where it curled into a fist.

The door to the cabin slid open abruptly, and a figure in black, cowled cloak, his hood pulled down to veil his face, entered and bowed to Kylo Ren.

“What is it?” the monster demanded.

“We’re landing soon, sir.  The others are assembling.”  The hooded man bowed again before disappearing.

“Landing?” Rey repeated.

“Come with me, scavenger, and be careful not to fall behind.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. More soon ;)


	4. Baudere

The most terrifying thing about Baudere wasn’t the near impenetrable dark, nor the legions of hooded figures lining the ancient processional way.  The most frightening thing by far, was the silence.

Baudere wasn’t a name she recognized.  She’d heard it as whisper passed between the Knights of Ren as they landed, and again from the hooded figure who’d approached Kylo Ren to welcome him home.

Rey doubted that she’d ever landed on a planet less deserving of being called ‘home’—not even Jakku.  There were no moons to cast shadows.  Light came only from the open gangway of the ship and the torches that spaced out along the processional way.  She could see little beyond their sickly glow, and  the thought that absolutely anything might be out there in the dark, frightened her more than she cared to admit.

She followed closely behind Kylo Ren as the returning knights made their way to whatever lay at the end of the cobblestone path.  Two robed figures walked in front, bearing a heavy, studded chest between them.  Kylo Ren came next, followed by herself and the rest of the Knights.  As they passed, one by one, each of the hooded figures standing along either side of the road, fell to their knees, and still there was silence— not a breath of wind or a murmur of a word, only the heavily shod feet of the Knights ringing against the cobblestone.

Up ahead, there were more torches. They were approaching something massive, she could tell by the way their footsteps echoed back.  The strange procession slowed, and Rey tilted her head back in an attempt to see the face of the massive statue blocking their path.  The torchlight gave only enough light to see the boots and the long, trailing cape of the stone figure, but she knew in an instant who it represented—Darth Vader. 

As each knight passed by, they extended a hand to touch the stone boots of the statue.  Rey shrank away from it, and then hurried past to catch up to Kylo Ren.

Beyond the statue, a pair of arched doors set into a wall—the dimensions of which she could only guess at—groaned open.  Rey followed Kylo inside, and found that they had entered a domed Hall.  Black silk banners with silver embroidery draped the walls, and long rows of columns supported the arched, glass ceiling.  The group of Knights splintered, each heading in their own direction.  Kylo Ren strode purposefully through the columns, through a doorway, and down a twisting hallway, with Rey keeping close behind.  He did not speak, nor did he turn his head to see that she followed.

They came at last to a door set deep into a niche, and when they passed through, Rey found herself in a small, but comfortable apartment.  One corner of the room was taken up by cupboards, and appeared to be a kitchen, and on the other side, a bed was pushed against the wall.  Separating the space was a table with two chairs, and the floor was carpeted in woven rugs.  Another door was set into the far wall, which suggested a washroom might lay beyond.

Kylo Ren removed his cloak.  His hands went next to his mask, but stopped.  He turned his attention to a panel on the wall, and with a touch, the lights dimmed.

“Where are we?” Rey asked, cringing at the loudness of her own voice.

“We are within the citadel of the Knights of Ren on Baudere, he replied, removing his gloves and tossing them onto the table.

“I don’t know Baudere.”

“No, you wouldn’t.”

“Is this where you live?”

“Occasionally.”

“What are we doing here?”

“Training,” he replied simply.

Rey scoffed.

“I won’t be your student.”

“You will do as I say, or you will die, he reminded her.

“Who are those people outside—the ones wearing robes?”

“Acolytes.”

She waited for him to speak again, to explain more, to give directions, to say anything at all, but he did not speak.  He went instead to the bed and sat down to remove his boots.

“What are you doing?” she demanded.

“I will sleep for a few hours.”

“And what am I supposed to do?”

“What you will.”

“How can you sleep with me here?  I might kill you.”

“You can try.”

He lay back, his long frame barely accommodated by the mattress, and rested his hands on his chest.  Rey glanced apprehensively to the table and chairs, but decided that it might be too far from him to risk for comfort.  She would not, however, sit down on the floor beside his bed like a trained pet.  How dare he sleep in her presence?  As though she posed so little threat!

“How can you sleep with that mask over your face?” she demanded.

He did not answer.  She doubted he had fallen so quickly to sleep, but it was impossible to tell.  She leaned over his prone form, and waved her hand slowly back and forth before his mask.  He did not move.

Rey sighed and her eyes again fell on the slim metal band that encircled her wrist.  By his account, tampering with it would activate the poison, as would removing it, or moving too far away from him.  If she killed him, she would have to take the body with her, which given his size, would prove nearly impossible.  However, if he was telling the truth, and the band on her arm could measure distance from him, it likely worked by honing in on a signal sent from something on his person.

He was not wearing a matching bracelet—that would be too obvious.  She scanned him visually for any bit of metal, any small token that might match the simple craftsmanship of her wristband, but discovered nothing.  The fingers of his right hand were slightly curled against his chest, as though he might be holding something loosely.

“Monster?” she whispered.  “Are you awake?”

The only answer was the steady rise and fall of his chest.  Slowly, she reached out and brushed her fingers lightly against the back of his hand.  She froze and waited for him to react.  He did not move.  His breathing continued as steadily as before.

Rey lifted his hand, ever so slightly, and swept her fingers swiftly across the palm of his hand.  She came up empty.  With a defeated sigh she dropped his hand, and leaned back.  She wasn’t even entirely certain what she was looking for.  It could be something under his clothes or it could be…

She glanced again at his mask.  Before, when she had been his prisoner on Starkiller Base, he had removed the mask almost immediately.  She remembered the moment quite vividly.  The face beneath the mask had fooled her, but only for an instant.  She had looked at him and thought him handsome, and then felt immediate shock and disgust at herself.  She wondered sometimes if he had seen that one moment of unguarded thought in her head as well.

This time, he was different.  He did not remove the mask, even to sleep, and though she assumed it was done to intimidate her, she secretly wondered if it meant something more.  She had wounded him after all.  In the forest she had struck him across the face with her light saber, and doubtless, it had let a scar.  Perhaps he didn’t want her to see a reminder of his defeat by her own hand, or perhaps… perhaps it was the mask itself which signaled her wristband.

It would be impossible to remove without waking him, of course.  If only there were some way to…

She could restrain him!  If she was careful and slow, she might be able to bind his wrists and ankles.  He would be helpless then, entirely at her mercy.  She would force him to remove the band, and then… well, she would sort the rest out later.

Rey scanned the area around the bed.  There were no obvious materials she could use to tie him up with.  Perhaps the cupboards or the washroom held something that might work, but that was too far away from him.  If he weren’t laying on top of the blanket, she might have been able to find a way to rip it up and use it for bindings, but to attempt that would surely wake him.  There was nothing—nothing but her own damp clothing!

Swifly, Rey unwound her arm bands.  She would tie his hands first.  She leaned over him, carefully lifted his wrist and slid the cloth band under it.  She tossed the other end over his opposite wrist, wrapped it around, and—

His hand shot up and snatched her wrist, yanking her forward, as he sat bolt upright.    She smashed against his chest and immediately struggled to free herself, but his hands moved up to clamp around her shoulders holding her firmly in place.  Her face was close enough to his mask that she could see the reflection of her own terrified eyes in his visor.

“Do not test my patience, scavenger,” he said, his words spoken calmly and slow.  “You will find I have very little of it.”

“I WILL find a way to free myself, monster! I will not stop try-“

He let go of her shoulder and swiftly raised one hand to her face.  Rey flinched, expecting him to strike her, but instead, the room went black and her terrified, racing, mind stilled.

*          *          *

 

Rey sat up with a terrified gasp, her last thoughts spiraling to the surface as she opened her eyes.  She expected to see him—his masked visage inches from her own face.  She expected to feel his long fingers wrapped securely around her arms, but her position was all wrong.  He was not there.

Disoriented, she leaned back on her elbows, and shook her head to clear it.  She recognized the small apartment as the one she had recently entered.  The bed was his, but now she was laid out on it, and covering her body, was a heavy black cloak—his cloak!    She snatched the collar and flung it onto the floor in disgust.

“Hardly necessary,” remarked a cold voice at her side.

She turned her head to see Kylo Ren sitting on a chair beside her.

“What did you do to me?” she hissed.

“I allowed you to rest.  You’ll be grateful for it soon enough.  Get up.”

He stood and retrieved his cloak from the floor, fastening it over his shoulder before walking away from her.  Rey jumped to her feet and followed, careful not to let him stride too far away.  He stopped at the door where a bundle of cloth lay folded.

“You may change into something clean if you wish,” he offered.  When he lifted the bundle, Rey could see that it was comprised of a simple grey tunic, a pair of leggings, and a heavy cloak.

“I don’t wish,” she snapped.

“Very well.  Wear this, you’ll need it,” he said and tossed the cloak at her.

“Why?”

“It’s cold where we’re going.”

“Where are we going?”

“To the eastern ridge of the Morfell Mountain Range.”

“Why?”

“To begin your training as one of my Knights.”

Rey followed him into the outer hall, still fastening the cloak about her.  It was slightly overlarge, made for someone of about her height, but with much broader shoulders.  She fought the urge to tell him that she did not want to train as one of his knights.  He would simply remind her that he could kill her any time he liked.

“You’re wasting your time with me.  I’ll never be like you,” she said, flinging the last few words with the intent of insulting him.

“We’ll see.”

When they reached the Hall beneath the high glass ceiling, Rey was shocked to see that the sky was still dark, yet her body felt well-rested, as though she had slept for hours.

“The nights last a long time on this planet,” she realized.

“The night lasts forever on Baudere,” he corrected.

Outside the boots of the giant statue gleamed dully in the flickering torchlight.  The acolytes had gone, and the cobblestone road lay deserted.  Kylo Ren paused long enough to lay his hand reverently against the base of the statue, before reaching under his robe, and removing a lightsaber.

He tossed it at her, and she caught it with one hand, immediately activating it.  The green blade cast an eerie glow around them.  For a split second, she imagined swinging it at him, cutting his head from his shoulders and watching the mask roll to a stop at her feet.  Kylo Ren gave a cold laugh.

“You will be a formidable dark force user,” he taunted.

“I won’t,” she switched the blade off and held the saber out to him.  “This isn’t mine.”

“The one you carried wasn’t yours either.  Keep it.  You’ll need it very soon.”

Rey clipped it onto her belt and again fell into step behind him.

“It’s a jedi blade,” she realized.  “Which jedi?  Who did you kill to take this blade?  Was it one of Master Luke’s padawans?”

Kylo Ren stopped again.  His fist clenched, and for a moment she wondered if would turn around and hit her.  She didn’t care.  The monster had murdered innocent children.  She hoped it hurt him to remember, hoped it made him angry to be reminded at least.

“It was mine,” he said at last.  “My first blade.”

He began walking again.  Rey hurried to catch up.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This piece is going to be really long, I'm afraid-- realllly, really long. I have a novel's worth of material in my head. Apologies.


	5. Resurrection Field

Rey swung the lightsaber again and again, its green blade flickering as it slashed through thick hollow spikes, shattering the strange formations to ash.  She could taste the gritty dust on her tongue.  She had to kick through the base of the spikes, which made moving forward extremely slow.

Kylo Ren followed silently.  He had taken his turn already, and was saving his strength for when her arms tired. 

“What are these things?” she grumbled, smashing her way through an especially thick clump of the strange, hollow, shafts.  She coughed on the cloud of ash produced.  For the first time, she envied him his mask.

“We call them sphix.  They are formed over years as gases heat and escape from the core.”

Rey paused to glance back over her shoulder at him.  It was the first time he had said more than one or two words to her since leaving the citadel.

“I suppose this is part of my training?” she sighed, swinging the blade again.

“Everything you will encounter between here and the Vulgas Pass is part of your training, yes,” he confirmed. 

“And when we reach the pass?” she wondered.

“You will speak the Chaata, a Force-seer.”

“Force-seer?  And what will I say?”

“Nothing.  She will tell you your death.”

Rey swung again and huffed in frustration.

“Well, that sounds pleasant!  I suppose I’ll be cutting through these the entire way.”

“No, but you will face other obstacles.”

“Of course,” she growled, and paused again to wipe the sweat from her brow.

Kylo Ren pushed past her, ignited his blade, and began clearing the path.  It was apparently Rey’s turn to rest.  She followed in his footsteps, holding her cloak over her mouth so as to breathe in less of the flying ash.

“Why should anyone want to know how they will die?” she asked, truly curious.

“So that they might accept it—“

“But why should they accept it?  If someone tells me that I’ll die by choking on an opfruit, I suppose I would avoid eating opfruit.”

“It is often in seeking to avoid one’s fate that one will find it,” he answered. 

With one swing of his light saber, he brought down more of the spines than Rey had with five.  She frowned at his back as she took a few more steps forward.

“I thought training would mean sparring, meditating—those sort of things.”

“You’ve already had that sort of training,” he answered.  “I also trained beneath that useless relic, Luke Skywalker.”

“And this is better?  Cutting our way through ash sticks in the dark, on our way to see a fortune-teller?” she demanded.  His barb toward Master Luke stung her.  When he didn’t answer, she sighed and rubbed at her sore shoulders.  “Is there truly never any daytime on this planet?”

“Baudere began as a rogue planet, drifting frozen through the darkness of deep space.  There has never been a daytime, and nothing has ever grown on this planet.  Be still a moment, and tell me what you feel, scavenger,” he stopped in his tracks, his crossguard saber still blazing red in his hand.

Rey closed her eyes and listened.  There was no wind, no noise, nothing but the sound of her own breathing and the hum of his lightsaber.  The feeling unnerved her—there was something missing, some vital thing.

“The Force!” she realized, her eyes snapping open in horror, “I can’t feel it!”

“You feel peace,” he corrected.  “The Force is there, it’s always there, but the Force is an energy created by living things.  On this dead planet, even the most powerful Force-users struggle to wield it.”

“It isn’t peace,” she argued, “it’s loss—like a part of me is missing.”

“You will learn to feel it even here,” he muttered.

She let him go on for some time, his blade slashing from left to right while his heavy boots stomped the spines to dust, but the silence now felt threatening to her.  She would rather hear anything, even the monster’s voice, than to be left in silence to focus on the loss of the Force.

“I suppose you’ve done this before—this training.  You’ve already gone to see the Chaata.  How do you die?”

“It isn’t a secret one shares,” he answered shortly.

“And I suppose you’ve accepted it, however it is that your end will come?” she prodded.

He did not answer, but it seemed to her that his next swing was particularly violent.

“I still think it a useless sort of training—to know when you will die, so that you can accept it.  I’d rather not know.”

“It’s a price to be paid for the knowledge you gain.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Once the Chaata tells you your death, you may ask her one further question.”

“What sort of question?”

“Whatever it is you most want to know.  The Chaata sees all that has ever been, and most of what will be.”

Rey’s thoughts flew at once to her parents, to the vision she’d had of their ship flying into the sky as Unkar Plutt yanked her away by her tiny wrist.  To know at last what had become of them, why they had never returned… but guilt came with that longing.  If she had one question, it should be to discover what the meaning of Dark Moon was.  After all, the girl on Ka’vec had likely escaped, and she was the only lead they’d managed to turn up.  Master Luke would say that the lives of many hung on that knowledge, it would be selfish of her to use her one question on her own curiousity.

“You’ve gone quiet.  I see the idea appeals to you,” Kylo Ren murmured.

“No,” she lied.  “I’ve had my fortune told before—back on Jakku.  There was a Crolute named Vardoy Bahl who came through Niima Outpost sometimes and told fortunes for rations.  Ask one question for one quarter ration, that was his rate,” she smirked at the memory.

“And what question did you ask of him?” Kylo asked, his interest uncharacteristic.

“I don’t remember,” she lied again.

He turned to face her, and Rey suddenly felt her scalp prickle and her forehead throb painfully.  In her memories Vardoy Bahl, leaned across the makeshift table and stared directly into her eyes.

 _“Never!  They’re never coming back and you already know as much,”_ he growled before snatching the quarter-ration fee from her.

“I see,” Kylo Ren said, and she knew, of course, that he did see, and that on Baudere, he could use the Force to enter her mind and she was powerless to stop him.

“How dare you,” she cried.

The monster froze and held a warning hand out to silence her.

“Be still, we’ve reached the Resurrection Fields.”

Rey looked and found that she could see a little ways ahead.  The spiny projections came to an end, and before them seemed to be a flat and level stretch.  When she squinted her eyes, she could see a faint bluish sort of haze that glowed faintly as it streamed upwards from the ground in narrow columns.

“The Resurrection Fields?” she repeated.

“It’s a trick,” he began.  “It’s important that you understand what you see here isn’t real.  They’re merely memories taken from your own head, though they might trap you here if you let them.”

“Speak plainer, what do you mean by memories?”

“They will appear as ghosts.  They will speak to you, beg you to stay, do their best to hinder you, but you must remember that they are not real, and if you linger on the fields too long, the toxic gases will kill you.  I advise you to run.”

Rey almost asked another question, but Kylo had already broken through the last spray of the spikes and was moving quickly across the open ground.  Rey did indeed have to run to match the stride set by his much longer legs.

“Ghosts?” she called to him.  “Your training strategy grows stranger by the hour.”

They were among the columns of luminous gas which she could now see rose from many small but ubiquitous geysers which peppered the field.  The glow which emanated from them had seemed blue at a distance, but now changed colors before her eyes, burning red, and orange, and golden as she watched.

Entranced, Rey jogged toward one, only to be jerked back by the monster at her side.

“Avoid those,” he warned.

Rey nodded, and glanced down at her wrist, surprised to see that he was still clutching it.

She had little time to consider why as the nearest column began to change shape and burn brighter, emitting sparks even, and then from the steam, stepped Han Solo.

Rey gasped, and almost stopped, but Kylo continued to pull her wrist.

“Ben!” Han cried, “BEN!”

“Not real,” Rey reminded herself, but it was difficult to believe her own words, when Han approached them, his clothes still displaying the blood-stained mark where the monster’s blade had pierced him.

“Ben, please stop.  Please listen to me.  Your mother wants you to come home, son,” Han pleaded.

Kylo Ren did not react.  He continued to drag her forward.

“I forgive you, son.  Your mother forgives you, just come with me…”

Rey glanced up at him and wondered what expression the face beneath the mask wore.  Did it bother him, or did he take grim satisfaction in the reminder of what he’d done to his father?  She shuddered remembering the moment the light saber sliced through him, the scream that had come from her mouth unbidden.  She had so admired Han, treasured the faint praise he had offered her.

The apparition turned to look at her as though she had spoken.

“Rey, you can’t go with him.  He’ll kill you too.  We can escape this sinkhole of a planet together,” Han said, extending his hand to her.

She almost reached for it, but at that moment, Kylo whirled and sliced the extended hand of Han Solo off at the wrist.  Rey screamed as Han’s body dissolved into clouds of hot, green gas.

“Faster!” the monster demanded, breaking into a jog.

Rey ran at his side, but there were more steaming, flickering figures approaching, with faces she didn’t recognize.  An old man in a dingy robe, shook his head.

“You cannot deny the truth that is your family!” he called as they raced past him.

Groups of people huddled together, screaming and covering their faces in terror—the ragged clothing they wore was strangely familiar to Rey.

There were other figures following them, a Twi’lek with her neck twisted at a freakish angle, a Stormtrooper, and countless others. 

Rey’s throat burned, and her legs felt strangely heavy.  It was growing hard for her to breathe.  Oddly enough, she could remember feeling the same way inside the Ka’vec brothel.  The air even had the same sickly sweet smell.

“Faster!” he demanded, and it seemed to her that all of the feeling had left her body except the point where his gloved hand gripped her wrist.  It burned.  She wished he would let go, horrible monster that he was!  It seemed very likely that all of the figures that pursued them had been his victims.

“REY!”

Her attention sharpened at the sound of the woman’s cry.  It was a voice filled with fear and longing at the same time, a voice that cried out to her in dreams.  She knew it.  It filled her entire being with hope.

“Mother,” Rey whispered.

She staggered toward them, as shocked to see Rey as Rey was to see her.  Giving a wordless cry she flung her arms out.

Rey’s burning wrist had become unbearably painful, she twisted her arm and broke free of him.

“Not real, she’s not real,” the monster growled.

Rey did not listen, she turned to run from him, and felt his fingers scrabble across her back, failing to find purchase.

“REY!” he screamed.

It stopped her briefly to hear her name come from his mouth, but she had waited too long to be reunited with the woman who held her arms out now.

“Where have you been?” her mother cried.  “I went back and you were gone.  Why did you leave?”

Just a few more steps, just a few more—

A red flash of light ripped through the darkness, passing with impossible speed through her mother.  The woman exploded into flying ash and gas.

“NOOOOO!” Rey screamed.

She whirled on him, reaching for her own light saber and igniting it just as he brought his down again, smashing the blade from her grip.

Rey staggered backwards.  Her heel caught the edge of a geyser and suddenly her foot felt as though it had caught fire.

She screamed again, and fell to her knees.  The pain was terrible, but had immediately cleared her thoughts.  The gas was toxic and had confused her thinking.  She had little time left.  Her breathing had become fearfully shallow without her realization, and the great shadowy monster who had created the legions of dead which surrounded them, towered over her, his crossguard saber still blazing.

The blade flickered out.  Quickly he bent, and lifted her from the ground.  He began to walk, and then to jog, and finally to run.

Her head bumped against his chest with every one of his footfalls, and she had to grit her teeth to keep from screaming at the pain of her foot being jarred again and again.  There were still voices, blurry shapes that continued to approach but now… now they were smaller.

They were smaller because they were children, and their voices were piteously young and sad as they called out to ‘Ben’ to stop, begging him to remember.

Kylo Ren’s breathing had grown ragged.

The silence returned.  The voices had stilled and all that remained of their ghostly companions was the faint glow of the geysers that came from over his shoulder.

Still he ran, his footsteps echoing in the dark.

“Stop!” she moaned, clutching at her knee.  “Stop please, my foot… it feels like it’s on fire.”

He slowed and finally stopped, immediately dropping to his knees.  She could hear him panting through his modulator.   He dropped her, and reached up to grip the sides of his mask.  The helmet hissed as he lifted it up and tossed it aside.

She couldn’t help but look.  The dim glow of the Resurrection Field reflected in his dark eyes, but in the faint light, she could barely discern the lines of his lean face.  She couldn’t make out the scar.

If he realized that she was staring at him, he did not show it.  Kylo tore her boot off and removed something small and silver from beneath his robes.  She flinched as he pressed the cold metal against the wound on her heel, and drew in a sharp breath when she felt it stab.  Her foot immediately felt numb.

“Fool,” he muttered.

“Did you kill all of those people?” she whispered.

“We’ll rest here,” he growled.

“Did you kill all of those people?” she repeated, louder.

“Necessary sacrifice,” he replied, his manner becoming calm and detached once more.

“And the children—were those Master Luke’s pada—“

“Enough, scavenger!” 

He stood and tossed her something heavy which turned out to be a flask containing water.  Wrapping his cloak tighter around himself he moved away and sat down far enough from her that she could only just make out his shape.

“It bothers you,” she said wonderingly.  “No.  It _pains_ you to remember it.”

He didn’t answer, and she could not see his face, but she knew she was right.  Kylo Ren could actually feel something like remorse.

Rey lay back, pillowing her head on her arm.  She found herself staring directly into the visor of his discarded helmet.  Slowly, she reached out and traced one finger across the line of silver which bordered the eyes of the mask, but froze as she was suddenly overcome by the feeling of being watched.

She quickly withdrew her hand and rolled onto her side, turning her back to him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't usually post more than one chapter a week, but this arc of the story is really coming out fast. I've already got a good start on chapter 6 and hope to post it Thursday or Friday. Thanks for reading, more to come!


	6. Brittle

_Sunlight… Rey closed her eyes and tilted her chin, savoring the heat on her face.  She could hear the Yarhls calling to each other in the trees nearby._

_Why couldn’t it always be this way?_

_As if in answer to her thought, a familiar fear seized hold so abruptly that she gasped._

_It was all wrong, all of it.  Master Luke was wrong.  Mother was wrong.  She’d seen the senators and how they wasted time, posturing to one another as Raiders burned another city, as people suffered, as children starved.  They couldn’t FEEL it.  They didn’t wake shaking and screaming in the night._

_Fear and anger brought the dark, Master Luke had cautioned.  Bitterness and hatred did not a Jedi make.  She clutched her head as though she could squeeze the thoughts from her head._

_Night time, and the whispering voice had come again.  It made promises to her.  It told her that her pain came from denying the Dark side, that she had only to accept who she was and the war inside her would be over.  How she wanted to!  How she wanted to believe that it was true.  The dark side isn’t what Master Luke tells you it is.  He doesn’t know, how could he?_

_She was so close—so close to letting go of the thread of light.  There was really only one option left.  She lifted the light saber with a shaking hand too large to be her own and placed the emitter over her heart.  Her finger trembled above the activation plate._

_She had to do it.  If she didn’t do it now, it would be too late.  She had already seen visions of what might happen if the darkness within her overcame the light._

_“Ben.”_

_Master Luke stood in the doorway, his face sorrowful.  Her heart leapt at the sight of him.  She hadn’t realized how much she missed her master.  At the same time, her veins burned with unexplainable anger and hatred.  She felt as though she were being torn apart._

_When she spoke, the deep tones of the voice belonged to the Monster._

_“Master Luke, please… please do it for me.  I am not strong enough.  I’m afraid.  I don’t know what I’ll do if—“_

_“That is not the way of a Jedi.  You must fight it, Ben.  You are stronger than you know.”_

_Her entire body convulsed with the hatred that surged through her, the light saber hilt fell from her hand.  Master Luke did not understand.  He would never understand what it was like._

_“I am not a Jedi!” she screamed.  “I will never be a Jedi!”_

Rey gasped, and opened her eyes to find the masked visage of Kylo Ren only inches from her face.  Startled, she lashed out, striking the side of his helmet, which bounced across the ground and rolled to a stop, empty.

Her foot throbbed as the memory of what happened in the Resurrection Field quickly returned.  She sat up slowly, recognizing the light-headed feeling that came from too many days without food.

Nearby, the monster still slept, though without the mask, it was difficult for her to remember that he was a monster.  He appeared even taller stretched out on the ground, with his long arms crossed over his chest.  Even in the chill air, beads of perspiration had formed on his pale face, and his forehead wrinkled as though something troubled him greatly. 

As she watched, his lips moved, mumbling something she couldn’t make out.  It occurred to her that if a monster like Kylo Ren could have nightmares, they must be very troubling visions indeed.

Curious, Rey inched closer to his sleeping form.  Sweat had caused tendrils of his long black hair to stick to his forehead and across his cheek, and the urge to smooth the few strands away caused her to reach out her hand before she realized what she was doing and snatched it back.

“You’re awake,” he said, without opening his eyes.

“Apparently, so are you,” she muttered backing away.

“And your injury?” he asked, sitting up and wrapping his arms around his knees.

“Hurts, but I suppose I’ll live.”

“Can you walk?” he clarified.

“I think so, but, do you… do you have any food?  I don’t know how long we’ve been out here, but it feels like a long time, and I don’t think I’ve eaten anything since before the raid on Ka’vec.”

“Hunger is a strong motivator.”

“You sound like someone I know back on Jakku.  I won’t argue that.  Hunger is as strong motivator, I suppose. I’ve seen good people do terrible things because they were hungry,” she said and sighed.

“And you?”

“What about me?

“You were only a little girl when you were abandoned on that wasteland of a planet.  I’ve seen it in your memories.  How did you survive for so long?  Did you not do terrible things yourself?

“No!” Rey answered, cringing as she realized that she had replied too quickly and too angrily.

She fidgeted nervously under his gaze for a moment, before she shrugged.

“Well, not too terrible.  I might have nicked a portion or two, but Niima Outpost was different when I was little.  It was never an easy place to live, but back then, there was a market.  Traders would come sometimes, and you could get a fair value for your salvage.  There were more people back then—other children even.  When times were bad, the scavengers would help each other out. That was before Ungar Plutt took over. He chased out all the competitors.  He set the trade values.”

“And there you waited and hoped,” he murmured, and rubbed the side of his chin thoughtfully.  “Such a pitiful existence, yet you don’t feel hate for the ones who abandoned you.”

“No.  There had to be a reason for it.  They meant to come back—“

“A miserable childhood—“

“No!  Well… not always.  When there were other children there, I played with them.  There was an old man who visited sometimes and told us stories.  I loved that.”

“Stories about what?” he asked.

Somehow he had moved closer without her noticing, and though he didn’t look at her when he asked, she could again feel genuine curiosity from him.

“What else?  Stories about the Clone War-- about Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader, Emperor Palpatine, the Jedi, the Force… we used to play pretend that we were rebel fighters afterwards.”

He scowled darkly at this, and picked at a stray thread from his cloak.  She had been careful not to include Han’s name, for those were always her favorite stories.

‘Tell me one,” he demanded.  “Is isn’t likely to be true, but I am curious.  I wonder what children in far off wastelands think they know of those people.”

Put off by his tone, Rey picked up the discarded canteen from the night before, and took her time unscrewing the cap to take a drink of water.  It didn’t help the empty feeling in her stomach.

“It was too long ago.  I don’t remember any,” she shrugged.

Kylo Ren did not call her bluff.  He frowned again, but after a moment, he reached under his robe, snatched a small black pouch, and tossed it to her without saying a word.

Rey opened it to find that it was full of soreltack—a dried meat often carried by Resistance fighters when they undertook long missions.

She snatched a piece and put one end into her mouth, jerking her head to the side to tear off a bite.  Soreltack was tough, but it lasted longer than just about anything.  As she chewed, she turned her attention back to the dark figure hunched beside her, and wondered why he did not eat.  She wondered also why he had asked her for her memory—not merely taken it as he had before.

“I suppose I might remember one,” she admitted, her mouth still full, “but it’s more like a song.”

“How is it ‘like’ a song?  It is a song or it isn’t.”

“It’s like a song, but really, it’s just a way to keep rhythm for a clapping game I used to play.”

He didn’t ask, but he glanced at her and raised one eyebrow.

“You know… clapping games?” she prodded.

He shook his head slowly.

Rey scoffed, but shoved the rest of the Soreltack in her mouth, brushed her hands off and held them out to him—one palm up, the other palm down.  When he did not offer his hands, she gave an irritated sigh and snatched both of his wrists.

“Like this!” she said, positioning his gloved hands, and then slapping them with her own.  “And then like this,” she positioned and slapped again. “And the last one is like this.  There.  Now you do that over and over.”

“Ridiculous,” he sneered.

“Well, I can’t tell you the rhyme if you don’t do it,” she shrugged.

She held her hands out in the first position, and snapped her fingers impatiently.  After a few seconds and a long dark look, she realized that he would not comply.

“Alright. Fine," she said, clapping her hands together to mimic the pattern of the game.  "It goes like this:

 

_Oil for the droids, trudging through the sand._

_A bandage for Luke who’s lost his hand._

_Soldiers for the princess from Alderaan._

_Death for the Jedi master Obi-Wan._

_Gold for the smuggler and his co-pilot._

_A meal for the Sarlacc in its pit._

_Rest for the old one, wise and green._

_A mask for the boy from Tatooine._

_Now, Light is the Force that’s rarely seen,_

_And Dark is the way of Palpatine_

_But grey is the balance in between_.”

 

Rey froze, interrupting the clapping rhythm.

“There’s more, I think, but I really can’t remember it.  I think it’s been too long,” she admitted.

Kylo Ren snatched his hands back and looked away from her.

“Get up, scavenger.  We still have a long way to go,” he ordered, and stood with the quick, graceful movement of a trained fighter.

Rey gave another frustrated sigh before reaching for her boot and pulling it grudgingly over her throbbing foot.  When she saw him stoop to retrieve his helmet, she scrambled quickly to her feet.

“Wait, STOP!” she cried, running towards him.

Kylo responded in an instant, his lightsaber out and blazing in his hand as he dropped into a defensive stance, and scanned the darkness before them.  He held his other arm out, directly in front of Rey’s face, as though keeping her back.

“Where is it?” he demanded.

“What?  Oh!  You thought…?  No, I—I didn’t see anything.  It’s just that I… it’s the helmet.  That mask again.  I just hoped you weren’t going to put it back on,” she stuttered.

The light saber hissed as the blade receded.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because you almost seem like a human without it,” she replied.  “Almost.”

In answer, he quickly bent and regained the mask, pulling it over his head without a moment’s hesitation.

As he walked away, Rey suddenly remembered the band around her wrist, and hurried after him.

Her foot hurt.  It throbbed angrily with every step she took, but at least it seemed that he was moving slower than normal.  Perhaps he was tired.  When he spoke again, she shivered.  The change in his voice was glaring.  When he spoke through the modulator, he sounded detached and emotionless.

“We’re coming to the Brittle Hills now.  You’ll need to be very careful to follow me as exactly as you can.  The trails that go up to the mountains are marked, but narrow.”

“What should I be careful of?” she wondered.

“The Brittle Hills are hollow, and the ground, in places, is very thin.  It can shatter beneath your feet, and if it does that, you will have a long way to fall, and a messy death.”

Rey grimaced.

When they had walked far enough for the faint light of the Resurrection Field to fade away, the ground did indeed begin to slope upward.  Kylo lit his blade and held it aloft, and in the red glow, she could see a stick driven into the ground.  Several feet away, there was another.

As they climbed upward, the hill became steeper, and the markers led them on a zig-zagged path.

“All that he did—All that he achieved…” Kylo Ren muttered.

“Who did what?” she called.

“Lord Vader.  He was one of the strongest Force users to have ever been born.  He conquered more planets, won more battles than—well, all that, and when children sing their foolish songs, he’s little more than a boy with a helmet.”

“You’re little more than a boy with a helmet,” Rey hissed under her breath.

“What was that, scavenger?” he stopped and turned slowly toward her.

He took one step toward her, and suddenly, the ground began to rumble.  A crack appeared from beneath his foot, a blacker line of black on the dark ground.

Was it an earthquake?

The crack raced out from beneath his foot and splintered, shooting into a dozen different directions at once.  It sounded like glass breaking.

“Get back!” he ordered.

Rey almost did, but then her fingers flew to the band.

“I can’t!” she realized.  “I can’t.  If it breaks, and you fall, I die all the same.”

Kylo took another step toward her, and then another.  The ground shattered.

He lunged as it broke.  The ground beneath Rey’s feet did not crumble.  It stayed intact.  If he could make it, he would be safe.

She reached for him, but realized that he had not had time to gather himself for the jump, and had not jumped hard enough.  He was not going to make it, and she could not even use the Force to help him.

His hand reached toward hers, and somehow, perhaps through his own Force use, his fingers brushed lightly over hers, and fastened on her band.  Rey wrapped her hand around his wrist and held tight as he fell.

Her arm and then her body was ripped to the ground from the weight of him, but she had somehow managed to hold on, stretched out on her stomach and dangling over the chasm as she held on with all her might—but her fingers were slipping.

“Hold on!” she ordered him.

But he did not hold on. Her wrist burned as he twisted the band.  It fell away, and then so did he.  Both were immediately swallowed by the darkness below.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know what you're thinking... All these wonderful, lovely smutty, smut fics on this site and I chose to read the one where 6 chapters in, they're playing pat-a-cake?!?!  
> He-he-he.  
> Slow burn!  
> More to come. Kudos and comments make me ridiculously happy ;)


	7. Things Unseen

The ground shuddered beneath her body.  She continued to lay on her stomach, her empty hands hanging over the invisible chasm which had swallowed him until the rumbling died into the skittering of small broken pieces as they descended unseeable slopes and settled.

And then silence.

Absolute silence, because she was holding her breath, and when she realized it, she let it out in a long terrified scream that sounded like his name.

No answer came. She was alone in the dark.

Paralyzed with fear, her breath came in shallow, shuddering gasps. The very thought of moving terrified her.  She could not go forward, but neither could she go back.  In that absolute dark, it was certain that she would eventually stray from the narrow path and set off another ground shattering quake.

And so Rey kept very still, and tried not to think about the fact that Kylo Ren had been standing on the marked path when the ground splintered beneath his feet, and that at any second, the same might happen to her.

She thought of Master Luke instead.  She imagined him stretched out on the ground beside her.  He would be silent as he considered how best to get out of the predicament.  Her fear would subside as she felt the peace that radiated from him.

Master Luke would use the Force somehow.  Even Kylo Ren had said it was not impossible to do so, just extremely difficult.

She cleared her mind again, attempting the meditative state that Master Luke had so often forced her to practice, and reached out… and felt nothing.

Of course!  Of course she felt nothing!  That was what she had been expecting after all, wasn’t it?  Using the Force wasn’t like she had thought it would be on Starkiller Base.

When it had first awakened in her, she could feel it—like hot scoria, burning through her veins as she bent people to her will, and fought the monster himself!  She had felt terrified and then angry and finally powerful, as though she could not lose to anyone.

And then came her training on Ach-to, and with it, the loss of that heady rush of power.  The Force did not come to her in the same way again.  It came like a wind, quickly and impossible to grasp, and it almost always slipped through her fingers before she managed to do anything with it.

She struggled to lift the tiny pebbles, and then the small stones, and her entire body shook as finally, Master Luke watched her levitate the jagged rocks around the base of the water fall.  It had drained her, left her exhausted and hungry.

Master Luke had said that such a struggle was normal for all padawans.  That it took time and patience to learn the ways of the Force, and when she had insisted that it had not been so when she had escaped the First Order, he would shrug and say that no skill worth having could be acquired without effort.

And though she had never said as much to him, she wondered if that was all there was to it.

Rey took a deep breath and tried again to clear her mind, but as she exhaled, her breath came out as a sob, and before she could force it down, another terrified whine slipped out, and she was struggling to breathe against the spasms of her own throat.

Terror had too strong a hold on her, and to fight it, she drew from her anger—her anger at Kylo Ren for capturing her and bringing her to this dark hole, her anger at the First Order, even her anger at Master Luke for not making her stronger.

And from the unknown depths of the chasm before her came a sound.

Or perhaps a feeling—it came like the beat from a deep drum—resounding and low, and then another beat, and then another…

She could feel it, could feel her own heartbeat slow to match this steady rhythm—because that is what this beating was—a life, a heart pulsing, and she knew it and knew it was his.  Kylo Ren had survived the fall.  At the bottom of the crevice, he continued to live.  The blood in her veins throbbed along with the beating of his heart.  She felt stronger.

“KYLO REN!” she screamed, and her voice echoed loudly back to her, but there came no answering shout.

Slowly, she moved her arm so that her hand skimmed the ground beside her, until her fingers traced over a lump—a small broken piece of the ground, perhaps.

Without hesitation she picked it up, flung it into the chasm and waited.

For a moment… silence, and then the sharp crack of it striking bottom echoed up to her—18 feet, or perhaps 20, which was far from the descent Kylo Ren had hinted at before, yet still far enough to do a good amount of damage.

Carefully, with her hands securely wrapped around the edge of the chasm, she sat up, and brought her legs forward until they dangled over the drop.

She took one last, steadying breath, leaned forward, and fell.

Legs bent, body loose, land on your toes, and above all, do not brace for the impact—Master Luke had made her practice falling.  He taught her to stay calm and collected, and to trust in the force, and though she had never fallen blindly through the dark, she clung to his training.  It was all she had.

Nearly there, she thought, squeezing her eyes shut, though it made little difference.  Knees bent, toes pointed and ready to absorb the hit—she would doubtless break some of them.

But it was not the ground which broke her fall.

Her legs were swept up as she was snatched from the air, but the force of her fall was too great to be stopped.  She was spun, her arms bound to her sides and her body cradled against something soft, before landing in a disoriented heap on top of someone else.

Quickly her hands moved across a torso, broad shoulders, a neck, and finally his face.

He stopped her searching hands by grabbing her wrists.

“You’re alive,” she said.

He sat up, causing her to roll off of him, and dropped her wrists.

“You jumped,” he said.

Light flared beside her.  Rey glanced down to see the outline of a large hand pressed against the ground.  The ground was glowing blue where he touched it!

“How are you do—“

“Why did you jump?” he whispered.

Rey glanced up and inhaled sharply.  In the faint light she could see that his face was only inches from hers.  He was staring so intently at her that she almost wished for the darkness to return.

“I don’t kn-“

“Why did you jump?”

“I didn’t have a choice.”

“You could have crawled back the way you came,” he murmured, his eyes never leaving her face.

“And risked the ground breaking beneath me?”

“Still a better option than jumping into a chasm.  Why jump, Rey?”

“Because… because, it wasn’t as deep as you said it would be.”

“Still deep enough to trap you.  I’ll ask again, why did you jump?”

“Because you fell.”

“And you knew that I was still alive,” he guessed, a slow smirk spread across his face.

“Yes.”

“How did you know?” he asked, and it seemed that he had moved even closer.  She could feel his breath on her face.

“I… I could feel it.  I just knew.”

“It is nearly impossible to use the Force on Baudere.”

“You can,” she said.

“Yes,” he agreed.  “And I could feel you.  I felt your fear… your anger… your hatred.  I felt you reaching for me.”

He raised his hand from the ground, and the light extinguished.  In the absolute dark, she could feel his fingers tracing the curve of her jaw, and then the soft press of his lips against the side of her face.

She froze.  She should have pushed him—screamed at him to stop, or at least pulled away, but she did none of those things.  She didn’t hate the feel of him touching her.  Perhaps it was relief.  Perhaps it was only the realization that she was not completely alone in the dark, but her heart was pounding, and—

And she realized that he had known exactly when to catch her.  He had used the Force to feel for her the way she had for him.  He had heard her scream his name and not answered.  Thinking back on it now, when the ground gave way, his demeanor had been strangely calm, even as he fell.  He had not even attempted to hold on to her hand!  He had waited silently at the bottom of the pit—waited, allowing her to think that he was dead, and that she was all alone in the dark with no way to escape.

All of this… was it a test?

Rey reached out.  Her fingers brushed against his hair.  Swiftly, she slid her fingers through it, grabbed a handful and yanked hard.

He gasped as she ripped his head back.

“What are you playing at?” she hissed.  “You wanted me to jump!  You could have answered me.  You could have-“

“I wanted you to use the Force,” he snarled, grabbing her arm and bending it to free himself from her grip.

“Then you should have asked.  You tricked me.  I was terrified and I thought… I thought…”

A new realization dawned on her.  She had used to the Force to find him, but had only accomplished this at the point when she had been the most afraid, and felt the most anger.  Fear… anger… the path to the dark side… the way the Force had come to her, almost too easily, making her feel stronger when it normally took energy from her… because it was dark. 

“Monster,” she whispered.

“I only want to help you… to teach you… but you must accept who you are.”

““I am not like you.  I will never be like you.”

“We’ll see.”

The red glow of his light saber blazed to life casting the dark canyon in a reddish glow. Rey winced.  He was standing.  He had gotten to his feet without making a sound, and now he stood over her, watching… waiting.

“I’ll kill you someday,” she said in a low voice.

He nodded slowly, and turned away.

“Get up.  We’re going to have to climb out,” he said, and began striding toward the far wall of the crevice.

Rey stood and followed.  Though as she walked, she pressed her fingers to the side of her face—the very spot his lips had lightly brushed against-- and felt the gooseflesh rise along her arms and down her spine.  She could remember vividly the feel of his mouth on her skin, and the way her heart had pounded against her chest.

Gritting her teeth, she curved her fingers, and scratched hard at her cheek, as though she could scrub the feeling off her skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. Hope you all liked it! Thanks so much for your kind feedback. More to come this weekend!


	8. The Chaata

Panting with exertion, Rey ignored the proffered hand before her.

The two had said little to each other during the climb.  The Brittle Hills had long since grown into the Morfell Mountains, and even after reaching the pass, the way was steep and treacherous.

The worst of it was that whatever he had injected her with had finally worn off, and the injury to her heel had become so painful that every step felt as if a knife was being driven into her foot. He’d had to stop and wait for her to catch up on multiple occasions, and she hated the idea that she appeared weak in front of him.

“We’ll stop here.  Rest,” he said.

“I am not tired,” she snapped.

“We’ve reached the Pass.  We aren’t going any farther.  We’ll wait here for the Chaata to approach us.”

In spite of her words, Rey dropped gratefully to the ground and immediately removed her boot.  When he sat down beside her—much too close by her standards—she scooted away from him and then proceeded to peel off her foot wrap.

Upon reaching the mountains, a drastic change had taken place upon their surroundings.  It had begun with the faintest of stars appearing in the black sky above them, which, as they climbed higher, had grown in number and intensity.  The skies now blazed with the light of uncountable stars, while directly above them, a large red planet flickered beneath a haze of rosy light.

She could see the higher mountains in the distance, and the darker valleys between them shrouded in dense, black fog.  More importantly, she could see her own foot, and the stains left on her footwraps from the draining wound.  Her heel was horribly swollen, and the dark color of the angry gash across it worried her.  It had become infected.

“Here,” he said holding out the water flask to her.

When she did not move to take it, he leaned over her body and poured water over her wound.  She hissed at the stinging sensation it caused, and threw her head back to focus instead on the stars.

“What planet is that?” she demanded through gritted teeth.

He stopped and shot a quick glance to the hazy red planet above.

“It’s a sun,” he corrected.

“It can’t be.”

“It is.  One of the oldest suns in this part of the galaxy.  It has been ages since Baudere came to this system, and now it is the only planet left in it.”

“What system?”

“Edonia.”

“I don’t know it.”

“No.  You wouldn’t, though this system, and especially Baudere, have long held special significance to the Sith.”

Rey stiffened at the word.  The Sith were gone, the last two—Palpatine and Darth Vader-- having died during the Battle of Endor, but still the very mention of the word was enough to make her shudder.  Their dark and violent history stretched for countless millennia into the past.  Even defeated, they remained terrifying.

“The Sith are dead, defeated,” she reminded him.

“The Sith have long had a habit of returning from the dead,” he said.  “Someday soon, we will travel to Korriban, and you will see for yourself that among the Sith, even the dead do not stay defeated.”

Rey scoffed.  The only way she would agree to go to Korriban would be bound and gagged—or dead herself.  Though she did not bother to correct him.  He surely knew that his training had so far had very little effect.

“Long ago, when this sun was young and bright, there were two planets which circled it.  The first was a forest planet, rich in resources, and populated by a race known as the Jerg,” he continued.  “The Jerg were a warrior-like race and vastly advanced in technology and training.  The second planet was a desert place, whose inhabitants were few and peaceful.  They lived as nomads, as water was scarce and they often had to travel far to find it.  These people were called the Vulgas.  In ancient times, long before the days of the Jedi or the Sith, the Jerg invaded the desert planet, seeking to take the Vulgas people as slaves.  A war followed, bloody and unevenly matched-- the Vulgas had little experience in fighting.”

His words conjured the image of her own desert home, Jakku, and the small community of scavengers she had long lived among.  She wanted to tell him that the Vulgas may have had very little experience fighting, but they were doubtless a resourceful and cunning people.  Though that hadn’t helped the people of Niima Outpost when the First Order had attacked.  This story was one she knew well.

“Among the Vulgas was a boy, a youngling known for his extraordinary ability to find water when no one else could.  It was said among his people that he could speak with the sands and the stars and gain answers to questions that no one else could.  The Sith believed that he must have been a Force-sensitive—one of the first in recorded history.  When the boy saw his people decimated, and his mother killed before his eyes, it was said that he fell into a trance-like state, neither eating nor sleeping for days and days.  During that time, the Jerg returned to their planet—their ships full of slaves—and began to ready themselves for another, larger attack.

“It never came to pass.  What came was the dark planet, Baudere.  It came from beyond the edges of the Edonia System, called from deep space by an unknown Force.  Baudere crashed into the forest planet, killing every life form on it—destroying it in an instant.  The entire event was witnessed by the Vulgas as it unfolded in the skies above them.  It was said that Baudere would have missed the planet entirely, but that the boy stood, and raised his arms to the skies, and the planets followed the movement of his hands.  From that day to this, there has never been a Force-user whose power could equal that of this one unnamed, desert boy’s.”

Rey had imagined the boy as someone very like herself.  A force-sensitive desert scavenger, made an orphan by forces greater than himself.  When the tale concluded with him rising up to destroy an entire planet, she shuddered.

“I wish you hadn’t told me that!  What a horrible story,” she mumbled.

“Horrible?  Surely not.  A defenseless, outnumbered people facing enslavement, rescued against impossible odds by the hands of one small boy.  Isn’t that the very sort of story that you Jedi strive to create?  That boy might have been the very first Jedi,” he taunted.

“The very first Sith, perhaps, but a Jedi?  Never!”

“He used the Force to protect the lives of his people.”

“He used the Force to destroy an entire planet—not just the warriors who had attacked his people, but their elders and their children, and every other living thing that existed on it!  And his people were on that planet too.  You just said they’d brought ships full of slaves.  He murdered his own people as well as theirs!”

“Better a quick and painless death, than life as a slave.  Perhaps their death was a mercy to them.”

“No.  As long as you live, there’s hope.  Slavery may be terrible.  Living everyday hungry, and afraid, and wondering may be a poor existence, but even then you can find reasons to keep going, to keep…” her voice trailed off as she remembered the series of marks etched carefully into the side of her own desert dwelling.  Just stay alive… she had told herself… just stay alive, because someday it could all change. “… to keep living,” she finished.

“What came of your hope, scavenger?” he whispered.  “You lived the life of a junk dealer’s slave in that desert, and now you live the life of a slave to your Master’s teachings.  When will you learn to break your chains and follow your own will?”

“As you have?” she spat.  “You are more a slave than I will ever be.  I’ve seen your Master—I’ve seen him in your dreams.  How he tortures you!  How you writhe and bow before him.  Don’t speak to me of slavery, Kylo Ren!”

“You know nothing!” he hissed.  “Do you think I do anything that I have not chosen of my own will?  You’re wrong!”

“Ah, I see.  You live with hope as well—though it’s a dark and twisted one.  That’s the way of the Sith, isn’t it—that they rise up and kill their Master eventually?  That’s your hope.”

“I am not a Sith!”

“Not in name, perhaps, but I’ve noticed that your Master only speaks to you from somewhere else.  He’s never in the same place as you, only communicates by holograms, doesn’t he?”

“The Supreme Leader has his reasons, and I doubt that he fears me… yet.”

Even arguing with him was more interaction than she desired.  She snatched the flask from his hand and used the water to rinse her foot wrapping, rebinding her wounded heel was agony.

Kylo Ren stood and began pacing beside her.  From time to time, he would stop, glance eastward, and then begin his pacing again.  Rey studiously ignored him.  Grabbing her boot, she eased it over her toes, and then biting down, attempted to pull it over her foot. Pain shot up her leg, curling into her stomach.  For an embarrassing moment, she thought it would make her sick.

Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes and tugged again.  The resulting wave of pain caused her to give a high-pitched shriek.

“STOP!” he ordered.  “Stop that now!”

He fell to his knees and ripped the boot from her hands.

“It’s swollen too much.  Can’t you see that?” he demanded.

“I can’t continue walking without it!” she insisted.

Dropping her boot, he stood, ignited his saber and swung.  Rey flinched as the fickering red blade cut through the air beside her, slicing the backside of her boot from top to heel.

He took a step back and glared down at her.  Grudgingly, she picked up the boot and slid her foot through the newly made opening.  Removing her arm wrap, she quickly wound the binding around her foot and ankle, tying it securely to hold the boot closed, ignoring the pain that clouded her vision as she wrapped it tight.

When she finished, she sighed and glanced up at him.

“It’s infected you know.  Once the infection gets in the blood, I won’t have long.  I’ll die.  I don’t know how long we’ve been travelling, but we’re days from any help, aren’t we?”

He did not answer, but resumed his pacing, swinging his blade nervously beside him.

“And the longer we sit here waiting for your fortune-telling friend,” she continued, “the more certain it is that I won’t make it back.  You know that, don’t you?”

He stopped, turning his back to her, and in that instant she felt something from him.  Not the steady beating of his heart, but a fierce wild surge of darkness that electrified her to the very core.

With a stifled cry, he raised his blade and swung wildly, attacking the rocky wall of the pass.  Sparks flew and bounced at his onslaught.  Transfixed, Rey stared open-mouthed.  She had never seen his cool demeanor broken.  The violence and anger that poured from him was palpable.

When it was over, he stood with his back to her, his shoulders heaving slightly as he breathed.  For a moment, she was too afraid to say anything, too afraid that his uncontrolled rage would turn on her and she would be sliced to bits, but fear was not the way of the Jedi.

“Did that rock insult your mother?” she scoffed.  “Perhaps you didn’t like the way it was looking at you?”

He turned his head to the side, so that she could see his face in profile.

“I see that you have changed very little, Ben Solo,” a strange throaty voice accused.

Rey turned to see the speaker, a very small and slightly greenish being with bulbous, milky white eyes.  Its robe was tattered and grey, and as it moved forward, it tapped a carved stick against the wall of the pass, the smack of the wooden stick against the stone echoed around them.  The creature was blind.

“You’re… the Chaata?” Rey confirmed.

“I am, and you’re the scavenger girl from Corellia, aren’t you?”

“From Jakku,” Rey corrected, and shot Kylo Ren a satisfied smirk.  Some all-knowing being!

“From Jakku recently, but born on Corellia, I think—though you wouldn’t remember.  You weren’t there very long,” the Chaata nodded.

Kylo Ren met her eye, his face impassive.  If this news surprised him, he didn’t show it.

“Come with me then, child,” the Chaata commanded and immediately she turned and began tapping her way back up the pass.

With a last backward glance at Kylo Ren, Rey stood and limped after her.

Ahead of them the path turned sharply, and for a moment, Rey thought the small creature had disappeared, but pausing to listen, she could hear the Chaata’s stick striking the ground again and again, and by following it, she found a narrow crevice in the mountainside.  Turning to the side, Rey was able to squeeze through and follow after the sound.

The path beyond the crevice was a narrow one, constricted by rocky walls on either side that went up and up until only a narrow strip of the starry sky could be seen.  It helped that Rey could press her hands against the walls and take some of the weight off her foot as she walked, but the farther she travelled the more obvious it became that she was in no condition for the journey back.  Perhaps she had come this far only for the Chaata to tell her that she would die of infection on this miserable, barren rock of a planet.  That would be ironic!

At every twist and bend in the trail, Rey expected to turn the corner and see the Chaata ahead of her, but the small creature was faster than her size hinted, and every time, there was only the endless rapping of her stick against the ground, echoing rhythmically through the constricted space.

And then there was silence.

Worried, Rey tried to move quicker, swinging her swollen and burning foot in wider arcs, and moving her hands faster down the walls.  Had the creature fallen?  Had it moved so far ahead that she could no longer hear the sound?

After a few minutes, the crevice walls widened so that Rey was forced to slump against one side, and then tapered down on one side so that she now stood on an exposed path that ran along the face of cliff.  It was dizzying to look down to the blackness below.

She moved slower, clinging to the face of the cliff, careful of where she set her feet.  Finally, the path ended and she stood before the entrance of a cave.

A fire was lit within, and the Chaata bent over it, stirring a small blackened pot suspended above it. 

 

“Hello?” Rey called, and winced as her voice echoed back to her.

“Yes, I know you’re there.  Come in then, come in and sit by the fire Rey of Jakku by Corellia,” the Chaata commanded.

Rey did as she was told, lowering herself as gently as she could, but the pain still caused her to inhale sharply as she sat.  The Chaata stopped what she doing to glance in her direction, as though the creature could see her.

“Yes,” the Chaata muttered.  “Definitely Corellia, but there was some time spent on Yavin 4 too, if I’m not much mistaken—though precious little time, if any at all.”

“And my parents?  My mother?” Rey questioned.  “She was Corellian as well, I suppose?”

“That’s not how it works, girl.  You get one question, and you only get that after I have my say.  Now then… you know what it is I’m going to tell you?”

“My death.  Kylo Ren said you were going to tell me how it is that I die,” Rey confirmed.

“Ah, but you speak of it with such indifference! What matter is death to you children who all see their lives as long lines stretched beyond their sight?  What I have to say is not a matter to be taken likely, and there are many wise beings who would chose not to listen, and rightly so.  It is both a power and a curse to know the ending of the story.  So I ask you now, do you truly want to know?”

“No.  I really don’t.  It was him that made me come all this way.  He wants to train me to be a Knight, but to what ends, I don’t know.  I don’t know what he hopes to accomplish,” Rey admitted.

“So go back to him, and tell him that you won’t do it,” the Chaata shrugged.

“He’ll kill me,” Rey scoffed.

“Do you think so?  I think you might be blinder than I am Rey of Jakku,” the Chaata gave a short wheeze which might have been a laugh.

“At any rate, if I listen to you, then I can ask a question—any question right?”

“Yes.  That is how it works.  Though you children never ask the right questions.  It’s always:  ‘ _How can I become more powerful_?’ or ‘ _How might I destroy my enemies_?’ I once had an acolyte who came all the way here, losing three fingers and the tip of his nose in the process, and all for me to answer the question: ‘ _How can I make her love me?’_ How inconsequential!” The Chaata shook her head at the memory.

“If those are the wrong questions, than what sort of questions do you consider right?”

“Oh child, I can’t tell you that.  That would be interfering, and I’m not one to interfere, but I suppose I can say that there are small questions one could ask that might change the fate of the entire galaxy.  If Ben Solo had asked a different question, the First Order would have been defeated before they began.  There are so few of you children who can see beyond your own shadows, but I’ve said enough.  You’ll have to decide.”

“Are you a dark force user?” Rey asked.

“Dark?  Light?  It’s all the same to me, child.  I’m blind—in more ways than one.  Here now, drink this,” the creature said, and lifted her pot from the fire.  The Chaata poured the contents into a small rock which Rey could see had been hollowed out, and held it out to her.

“What is it?” Rey asked, taking the heavy chalice from her.

“A drink with a bit of added ease for your foot.  It won’t help the infection that’s set in, but it will take the pain away for a short time.”

“Thank you,” Rey murmured, and lifted the cup to her lips.

“Well then, what’s it to be, Rey of Jakku?”

Rey took a sip, and considered for a moment.  There was nothing to stop her from leaving right now and telling Kylo Ren that she had had her fortune told and her question answered, but if she left now, she might never know what had caused her family to leave her on Jakku.

No, she reminded herself, if she left now, she might never find out what the Dark Moon was.  Still, the idea that she would carry the knowledge of her own death for the rest of her life seemed a heavy price to pay.

“Time is of the essence in your case,” the Chaata urged her.  “If you’re going to leave, you’d best leave now.  If you linger here too long, you’ll die before I can tell you that you’ll die.”

Frustrated, Rey downed the rest of her drink, and wiped her mouth on her sleeve.  This was no easy decision!  Perhaps Kylo Ren would use the Force to peer into her mind and see her death for himself, and if he found that she had refused to hear it, perhaps he would… but why kill her now when he could have done so at any time?  And what did it matter really?  As long as she died a Jedi, fighting for what she believed, how terrible could it truly be?

“Tell me!” she demanded, setting her cup down a bit too hard, and balling her hands into fists.

“Good.  There’s a brave child, and a brave death I foresee for you, many years hence.  You’ll fall in battle on an uncharted moon, but not before you defeat your greatest enemy.  You will be mourned by thousands.”

“I’ll die a Jedi then?”

“Is that your question?” the Chaata smirked.  “I must say, it is a very small one.”

“No!  No… I… my question is… my question…”

A war raged inside her as she struggled to form the words, but a Jedi must think of the universal good, and not of oneself, and Rey was determined not to disappoint Master Luke.

“My question is… what is the Dark Moon, and how do we stop it?”

“That’s two questions, child, and I’m not given to being generous.”

“Very well, than answer the first, what is the Dark Moon?”

“It is a vessel—an ancient ship of a sort.  Self-aware and at the service of the Sith.”

“But there are no Sith,” Rey said, though a question was implied.

“Aren’t there?” the Chaata sniffed.

“It’s a ship then?  How is it that no one has ever seen it?  How is it possible that a single ship might decimate entire armies?”

“Hadn’t you better be going?  I’d hate to be proven wrong about your fate—it was such a good one after all, and that medicine won’t last very long.”

“Yes,” Rey said, standing up.

“And not that I’m one to interfere, you understand, but if Ben Solo offers you the opportunity to accompany him to Korriban, you might as well accept.”

Rey nodded, and turned to go.  The agonizing pain had numbed somewhat, and she found that taking a step had become noticeably easier.

“There is still good in him,” the Chaata called after her.

When Rey turned to glance back at the creature, she found that the Chaata had bent back over her fire and was stirring her pot with great concentration.

“What did you say?”

“Nothing,” the Chaata smiled.  “Nothing at all.  I’m not one to interfere, you know.”

Rey waited a moment, but when she saw that the Chaata would not speak again, she turned and made her way out of the cave.

The Chaata stirred her pot and chuckled to herself.

 

 

 

 

 


	9. Fever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not even going to say anything... just gonna leave this chapter right here...

In the space of a few short hours, the Chaata’s first prophecy came to pass—the medicine did wear off quickly.

Rey began the descent plodding steadily behind Kylo Ren.  Before they had even reached the Brittle Hills, she was forced to lean against the rocky wall of the Pass to keep her balance.  By the time they encountered the first trail markers leading down into the foothills, the rock walls had long since disappeared, and she was forced to swallow her pride and accept the arm of the monster himself as her support.

To his credit, he did not sneer at her weakness, nor did he taunt her for needing his help.  By the third time she stumbled, he extinguished his blade, replaced it on his belt, and drew her arm around his shoulders, hefting her fully onto his back.

Rey would have liked to protest.  She would have liked to demand that he let her down and allow her the use of her own two feet, but she was tired—dreadfully tired.  It seemed to her that they had stopped twice to sleep on the way up to the Pass, but now he rarely halted, even for a few moments of rest.

She could see nothing without the light of his blade, and wondered how he managed to find his way along the narrow trail.  All the same, she was thankful for the darkness.  She could pretend it was someone else’s shoulder her cheek rested upon.

It became nearly impossible for her to mark the passing of time.  Always, he walked downward, and his even footsteps were the only thing she could focus on besides pain.  She suspected that she was drifting in and out consciousness, for at times she heard voices that she knew should not be there with her.  It was becoming ever more difficult for her to discern what was real.

At last he stopped, and the absence of his steps and the sway of his body, momentarily jarred her fully awake.

“We’ve reached the edge of the Resurrection Field,” his deep voice informed her.  She could feel the vibration of him speaking through his back.  “We’ll rest here briefly.”

He knelt slowly, and she thought she detected a slight tremor in his movements.  There were limits to even the strength of a monster, she realized as she tried to stand on her own feet.  She took a step back and immediately collapsed—unable to support her own weight.  In fact trying to stay upright made her feel extremely light-headed, and so she lay down at once.

She could see the dim glow that came from the flat stretch of land beneath them, and recognized the faint colors from her first trip across it—although she hadn’t been so cold then.  When had it become so cold?  She couldn’t remember.  Perhaps it was only the loss of warmth that came from him.  She shivered.

“A bad time to be a Jedi,” a voice informed her.

 She looked up to see a boy standing over her.  He wore a long grey tunic, the sort of robe favored by desert dwellers for its light weight and yet full cover.  Dark, untidy hair fell over his thin face.  As she watched, he reached up to brush the hair back from his eyes, but as soon as he dropped his hand, the hair settled back in its place.

There was something not quite right about the boy.  Perhaps it was the fact that he seemed to emit the same faint glow as the field beneath him.

“I said it’s a bad time to be a Jedi,” the boy repeated.  “If you go now, they won’t have to know you were here.”

“Not... real,” Rey rasped, hoping to vanish him.

“Sit up, Rey,” Kylo Ren ordered her.

When she did not comply, she felt the cool leather of his glove slide beneath her neck and tilt her head slightly.  The water flask was pressed to her lips, and she drank greedily, not realizing how thirsty she was until that moment, but her throat constricted as she tried to swallow and she coughed up most of it.

The boy shook his head sadly.

“Even if you run, they’ll find you.  Hide well youngling.  You’re far too small and weak to fight—“ the boy warned.

“We’re close,” she gasped.  “Too close to it…”

“Not close enough,” Kylo disagreed.  “The citadel is still more than half a day’s walk from the other side of the Field.”

“No… the Field… can’t you…” Rey’s voice trailed off.

She glanced between the boy’s pale, glowing face and the grim visage of the monster beside her.  He could not see what spoke to her.  She closed her eyes, determined that she would not see it either.

“Rey?” Kylo gave her shoulder a firm shake. 

“Go away,” she whispered.

She regretted her words immediately, as the monster removed his hand, and left her adrift in the dark.  She hadn’t meant him, but the boy did had not understood her meaning either, for even with her eyes closed, he spoke to her:

“He won’t save you, you know.  He acts like he will, but he can’t.  He’s a liar!”

It was more frightening to feel alone with only the voice, and so she opened her eyes and sought the comfort of the sight of Kylo Ren.  He was crouched nearby, staring down at the Field, and the glow that came from beneath them made his face appear slightly luminous as well.  The mask had gone, she couldn’t recall when.  Perhaps a long time ago, when he first fell into the crevice.  She hadn’t noticed.

“You aren’t listening to me!” the boy accused, and he stepped between her and Kylo Ren, demanding her attention.  “Are you thick?  You are, aren’t you?!  You’re as thick as a hutt’s ass!  I said leave!  Leave, or you’ll be sorry!”

“Stop.  Go away!” Rey breathed.

Kylo spoke then, but she couldn’t make out his words.  From the boy’s hand, came the green flash of a light saber being activated, and Rey tried to raise her hand against the blow she knew would come, but her arms were heavy.

“No,” she cried, “please stop!”

“I warned you,” the boy growled, and brought the blade down.

Rey tried to scream, but the sound died in her throat.  What touched her hand was not the searing blow a light saber blade, but the strong grasp of another’s hand.

“You’re hallucinating,” Kylo Ren informed her.  “Whatever you’re seeing now, it isn’t real.”

“The Field..”

“It isn’t the Field, Rey.  We aren’t close enough.  The infection is in your blood.  Enough rest.  We’re moving on.”

“No,” she said, shaking her head slightly.  “No.  You can’t… I’m stronger than you think.  I’ll be fine… still far, isn’t it?  You can sleep… a bit.  I’m tired anyhow.”

“No.  We’ll rest later.  Come on,” he lifted her arm, and slid his hand beneath her, but Rey shook her head, and tried to pull away.  He was a human, mostly, and surely he was nearing his limits.  He would need strength to get them both across the Field, strength he likely didn’t have after carrying her down through the Brittle Hills.

With a short sigh of frustration, he dropped her arm, and then reached up to stroke the side of her forehead.  It was the last thing she remembered.

 

*             *             *

 

An explosion of light and sound brought her out of a troubled sleep.  There was too much of it!  Bright and hot, like the sun on Jakku the light was strong enough to turn the blackness behind her eyelids to a fiery red, and when she tried to open them, it hurt.  She held her hand up to shield her face, but found that her arm was quickly snatched and secured to her side.  Her other arm was bound as well.  She couldn’t move!

Voices whispered and warned and called to one another, and whether they were real or not, she could not say.  There was too much light to see anything.

She remembered his touch and wondered if she were dreaming again, if this were some new nightmare brought on by the poison of the Resurrection Field, and she called out to him, but he was not there, because surely she would know.  Surely she would hear the drum beat that came from him if he was close.

She remembered the pain next, because it sharpened in an instant, and it seemed that a red hot iron had been touched to the wound.  The sharp and unimaginable agony that shot through her at that moment erased every other thought from her head.  She could smell flesh burning.  If her stomach were not empty, she would have puked.  She could feel the taste of acid in her mouth, and then… fortunate, blessed nothingness again.

 

*             *             *

“Rey,” his deep voice whispered, “Are you awake, Rey?”

She was now.  The light had gone.  It was dark behind her eyelids again, and the horrible pain had gone, but the weariness had not—nor the cold.  She shivered beneath her cloak.

“No,” she answered, and heard him release a long breath.

He must have stopped to rest at last.  Perhaps they had crossed the Field, though if memory served her well, they should have been among the ash spikes—he had a name for them, but she couldn’t recall what it was.  Perhaps her memory was not so good after all.

“Does it hurt?” he asked.

It did, of course, but infinitely less than it had.  Her foot had become a dull throbbing thing, a thousand times more endurable than what it had been before.  Perhaps that was a bad sign, and he would immediately insist upon moving on, but she was so tired!  Rey shivered again, and drew the cloak tighter around her body.

“Cold,” she murmured.

“I’ll fetch you another blanket.  I’m afraid we don’t have any body temperature regulators here.”

“Funny!” she scoffed, annoyed by his sarcasm.

The weight of another layer of cloth fell over her, and she opened her eyes to see that he was leaning over her in different clothing than she remembered.  The ceiling behind his head was slightly arched and somewhat familiar.

“Where am I?” she whispered.

“The Citadel.  You’ve been in and out of consciousness over the last three days.  What do you remember?”

She shivered again, and glanced about herself.  The room itself was not one she recognized, though its furnishings were very similar to the small apartment she had first seen.  This time she found it comforting instead of sterile.  He, however, did not look well.  His hair hung lank and unwashed framing a face that seemed paler than usual. Dark circles beneath his eyes gave him a rather haunted expression.

“The Field… I remember reaching the Resurrection Field.  The boy there wouldn’t go away…and then you made me sleep!” she accused.

“The boy?”

“He told me to leave this place, and said you couldn’t be trusted,” she remembered.

“You were unwell—hallucinating.  You remembered the story I told you of the Vulgas boy and imagined him there.  The medic said that you called out in your sleep, though your words made little sense.  He came very close to taking your foot.”

Frightened, Rey lifted the blanket and glanced down, but was immediately reassured by the sight of her heavily bandaged foot.

Lifting the blanket even for so brief a moment had chilled her, and she shivered again.

“Why can’t I get warm?” she wondered, and closed her eyes.

“Your body is still fighting the infection.  It’s the fever.”

He rested one large hand against the side of her face— it was so warm that she did not protest.

“You carried me,” she mumbled, “You saved my life on the Resurrection Field, and during the raid on Ka’vec. I don’t understand you.”

“Because you would kill me if given half a chance?” he asked.

Rey considered it.  She wanted to agree, but deep down, she suspected that she could not.  She had hesitated even on Starkiller Base when she had very much wanted to end his life.

“Not right now, I wouldn’t,” she whispered.

“Not right now?” he repeated.

“Your hand is warm.”

He made a low noise in his throat that might have been a laugh, and laid his other hand across her shoulder.  She could feel its warmth through the blanket.

“Why are you being kind to me?” she asked.

“It isn’t kindness to keep you alive, Rey.  I have use for you.”

“What use?”

“To let me train you.  To allow me to be your teacher.”

“I’ve seen how many acolytes there are in this place.  I’m sure one of them would love to be your apprentice.  Why can’t you chose someone else?  Someone who wants to be your student?  I already have a teacher.”

“It has to be you, or I’ll never complete the Supreme Leader’s training.”

“You’ve been following Snoke’s orders all this time,” she realized, and for some reason it made her blood boil.

“You will come to understand how wise the Supreme Leader is in time.”

She considered it, traveling by the side of Kylo Ren the way she had with Master Luke.  Although his hands were warm and comforting now, they had done much evil, bringing death to a vast number of people.  She had seen their bloodied and twisted bodies on the Field.  She could not imagine herself apprenticed to the Dark Side, the student of Kylo Ren.  Yet if she continued to refuse him, his patience would one day wane, and without her Force abilities, one of those large warm hands was all he would need to snap her neck.

“I will train you, Rey.  You may hate me if you wish.  Perhaps it is better that you do.”

“The way you hate your master?  Will you train me the same way he trained you—with pain and torture?  Is that what you mean?”

He drew back and she almost groaned at the loss of warmth from his hands.

“Pain is learning,” he murmured.

“Then teach me now,” she growled, opening her eyes.  “I’m weak and I can’t defend myself.  Use the Force against me the way he did to you.  Make me scream and writhe and beg.  Make me hate you.  That’s what you want, isn’t it?”

He watched her without blinking, his expression detached yet focused… and then he smirked.  Irrational anger surged through her.  She sat up, ignoring the fact that being upright caused the room to spin.  She was tired of being toyed with, of being trapped and dependent on a cruel, sadistic monster.  Had she truly thought she couldn’t kill him?  What she wouldn’t give for a light saber now!

“Master Luke will find me!”

“I do hope so.  It will save me the trouble of finding him.”

Rey wasn’t sure if her body was shaking from anger or from cold.

“So that you can do to him what you did to Han Solo?” she hissed.

“You barely knew Han Solo.”

“I know you!  That’s more than enough.  I see your dreams, even here on this dead rock of a planet.  I used to think you a creature in a mask—a terrifying beast, but I know better now.  You’re something far worse than that.  You make people believe there’s some good in you, you make them believe that there’s something that might be saved, but there’s nothing!  There’s nothing but darkness, and death.  You’re a trap.  You give them hope so they won’t suspect your blade.”

“By your own mouth, anything, even slavery is bearable if a fool can hope,” he sneered.

Rey threw back the blankets and stood, clenching her fists.  She was cold no longer.  If pain was learning, she would teach him a lesson now.  She could feel the power in her veins.  The electric, vibrating strength that flowed through her, and knew that she could turn it against him.  She could reach out with her mind and…

The throbbing of his heart thudded in her ears.  It beat rapidly, too fast for his calm, arrogant appearance to be true.  Not from fear… not fear of her at least, of that she was certain.

He had set another trap, she realized.

In her rage and hatred, she had once again managed to draw on the Dark Force, and when she understood, she closed her eyes and shook her head—willing herself to be calm.

“No, scavenger!” he growled.  “Don’t let it go.  Use it.  Use the Force to make yourself strong!  Look how weak you are without your Master— useless and fragile, shivering from cold!  That is what the light does to you, it makes you weak!  Be strong, Rey-- stronger than your master.”

“And that’s what the Dark has done for you… it’s made you stronger?” she demanded, but her anger was fading, and her hands were so cold they shook.  She hid them behind her back so that he would not see.

He shot out of the chair and snatched her chin, forcing her to stare directly into his eyes.  She should have been afraid.  He towered over her.  Her energy was gone, and not just her hands, but her entire body now shook with chills. Perhaps he intended to hurt her, but such a comfortable heat he radiated.  His hand was hot on her cold skin, his breath warm on her cheek, and she remembered lying her face against his shoulder and how warm his back had been.

“Hate me,” he whispered.

“That is not the Jedi way.”

“You are no Jedi, scavenger girl!”

She opened her mouth to reply, but he moved faster, and jerked her forward, sealing her lips with his own.  She struggled to break free, but found herself crushed against his body as he wrapped his long arms around her.  The heat of his body-- even through the heavy fabric of his tunic-- melted her, and it felt so good to be warm that she moaned against his lips.

He moved lower, running his lip down the side of her cheek and then trailing hungry, rough kisses down her neck.  His mouth burned hot against her ice cold skin and she gasped at the sensation.

She must not lose her head.  A Jedi must not give in to--

Kylo Ren, leader of the dark knights, murderer, monster, and enemy buried his face against her neck and made a sound that nearly broke her resolve, something between a groan of agony, and a cry of longing.

But when she, for reason she didn’t know, raised her trembling hand to trace the angular line of his jaw, he jerked away as though he had been the one burnt, releasing her abruptly so that she stumbled and fell back against the cot.

He turned quickly away from her.

“If you aren’t strong enough for anger, at the very least, don’t be weak enough to die of fever,” he growled.

Rey had no smart answer for his taunt.  She was left stunned, reeling to try and understand what had just happened, and before she could gather herself enough to call him a dirty name, he had gone.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	10. MT-5927

MT-5927 had been on Baudere for almost a year, when Kylo Ren staggered into the medic wing of the Citadel with the body of a mostly dead girl flung over his shoulder.  He dropped the limp form on the nearest gurney, took a few more steps, and then collapsed to his knees, panting.

The medic’s first reaction had been to attend to the Knight himself.  Kylo Ren was, after all, the highest ranking member of the First Order on site, and even an untrained eye could see that he was in bad shape.

MT-5927’s eyes were not untrained, and therefore did not miss the shallow, rapid breathing, the pallor of his skin, or even the ragged and filthy condition of his superior’s clothing.  He immediately brought water for the man, and when Kylo reached out take the cup and accidentally knocked it from his hand, the medic suspected that his body might be shutting down from over-exertion.

He snatched the vitals probe from the desk, and dropped down beside the dark figure to begin administering aid, when all the air was sucked from the room.

MT-5927 tried to gasp, his hands moving immediately to his throat, but found instead that his body had frozen.  In the same instant, he was flung across the room like a used-up sterishot.  His body crashed against the wall, knocking over a tray of bloodprobes.

Kylo, meanwhile, had climbed to his feet, leaning heavily against the girl’s gurney to support himself.  MT-5927 had made an error in judgement.  He had approached his superior without permission, and in doing so, had silently acknowledged the Knight’s weakened condition.  He had enough experience with Kylo’s temper to stay where he was on the floor.  A second error in judgement might cost him his life.

“This girl… there is infection,” the Knight struggled to speak through labored breaths.  “If she dies… so will you.”

MT-5927 was on his feet before Kylo finished speaking.  He had received that threat before.  It had come from the mouth of General Hux after Kylo Ren had himself been dropped onto a gurney in front of him, bleeding and unconscious.

The medic assessed the girl as he approached.  It was difficult to tell if she was still breathing.  Her body was slender to the point of being bony.  Her skin appeared dry and her eyes slightly sunken, but just as he reached her side, her entire body spasmed—proving there was life there still. 

Dehydration… Malnourishment… Fever… Convulsions… and that was before he had even located the wound.  Another few seconds scanning her and he noted the shredded boot secured to her foot with linen wrappings.

He hastily pressed the call button, which quickly summoned the post’s two surgical droids—an out-dated 2-1B, and a modified DD-13.

“Deedee, Remove the patient’s left boot, so we can get a better look at the injury.  Two-one, I’ll need a vitals check,” he ordered.

The two droids immediately moved into action—the DD unit clamped down on the girl’s jerking leg, and used its surgi-laser to burn a precise incision down the boot, while two-one secured her flailing arm and swiftly inserted a needle probe.

“Species identified: Corellian… female… aged approximately nineteen years,” two-one reported.  “Body temperature exceeds average Corellian range by seven points.  Heart rate exceeds average Corellian range by—“

The droid’s report was interrupted by MT-5927 gagging.  With the removal of the boot, the horrible stench of advanced infection filled the room.  The smell of rotting meat and dead body was strong enough to cause even Kylo Ren to blanch.

Through watering eyes, MT-5927 watched as the DD-13 peeled away bandages wet with pus, to reveal a raw angry gash across the girl’s heel.  The foot had swollen to twice its normal size and dead tissue around the wound had already blackened.

“That foot will have to come off,” MT-5927 affirmed, though everyone present certainly realized it.  He reached for the overhead surgical light and positioned it above the gurney as he spoke, switching it on as DD-13 began transitioning its appendage to surgical mode.

The bright light appeared to have caused a response in the girl.  Her eyelids fluttered weakly, as she tried to turn her face away, and then her arm came up to swat at something they couldn’t see.  Two-one moved quickly to secure that appendage as well—but this only served to frustrate the patient more.  She grimaced and struggled against her bonds.  Her lips moved, and as the medic moved in to catch her words, he was halted by the deep voice of Kylo Ren.

“You will not remove her foot.  I want her whole,” the Knight commanded.

MT-5927 opened his mouth to argue—the infection was too far gone! Her starved body was in no condition to fight off anything, and it wasn’t as though they had anything like a bacta tank on this far-flung outpost.  It was madness to expect him to save both her and her foot, and against standard protocol besides.  He’d seen amputations occur with patients of far better prognosis aboard the Finalizer.  With prosthetics as advanced as they were these days, it was far more cost effective to lop of an appendage and replace it with a standard robotic limb—the medical unit bought them in bulk.

He wisely decided not to voice his dissent. Kylo Ren would realize all of this already, of course.  As a member of the First Order and a battle-hardened warrior, he should have known to remove her foot himself.  One swing of his light saber would have brought it off while instantly cauterizing the arteries.  Yet he chose to carry her until his own body almost gave out— suggesting a strange relationship between the knight and the rough-looking girl.

“Two-one, I need an update on stock.  How many units of bacta do we have on-hand?” MT-5927 snapped.

“Three units, sir.”

“Do we have any body temperature regulators?”

“None, sir.”

“Fine.  Give her a shot of Ficol—enough to knock her out.  Follow that with a unit of Bacta.  DeeDee, we’ll need to burn out the dead tissue… now, NOW!  Let’s go, you old bucket of bolts!” the Medic ordered.

The girl’s lips moved again.

“Be still.  You’re safe now.  Try not to move,” MT-5927 warned her.  There was little chance she heard or understood his words, they were spoken more for the benefit of Kylo Ren, whose eyes followed his every movement and whose tense, stiff posture reminded him of a predator about to strike.

Her lips moved without stopping, and at last the medic could make out a few of the words they formed.  Two to be exact:

 _Kylo Ren_.

She said his name over and over, and even bound, her hand moved to reach for something… or someone.  She was delirious, certainly, but the Knight himself was behaving strangely—careful never to look at the girl or her wound, focusing his attention on the medic instead.  His tension perhaps came not from a desire to attack.  Perhaps it was fear.  This girl’s life must somehow be extremely valuable to the First Order.

“Am I talking to myself, Two-one?  Ficol, now!” MT-5927 demanded.

The droid was probably calculating the exact amount required for the body mass of a Corellian suffering from dehydration and malnourishment, but at the sound of his voice, Two-one’s probe jerked forward and stabbed the girl’s leg.  DeeDee extended its surgi-laser, and in instant later, the smell of burning flesh almost overpowered the odor of rot.

The girl’s body shuddered violently as she opened her mouth in a soundless scream.

“More Ficol!  MORE FICOL!” MT-5927 yelled.

Kylo Ren was faster than the droid.  He shoved two-one roughly aside, and extended a hand above her forehead.  She immediately went limp.

For a moment, there was only the sound of the DD-13’s surgi-laser burning through the dead tissue.  The Knight still held one hand above the girl’s face, his fingers close enough to almost touch her forehed.  When he realized the medic was staring at him, he hastily withdrew his hand and turned away.

“If she dies… you die,” Kylo Ren repeated, and with that, he strode quickly away.

 

*             *             *

 

Three days and two more injections of Bacta had brought vast improvements to the wound, though the girl herself had never regained full consciousness.  There were times when she spoke in delirium, and at those times, MT-5927 listened attentively, curious to discover who she was and what the First Order would use her for, but the bit and pieces of the one-sided conversations he could make-out relayed little of value.  She spoke to her mother once, and assured her master that she was coming several times, but most often she called out for Kylo Ren—though she never said why.

The Knight had haunted the sick bay over the past few days—a silent specter who stood impassively in the corner of the girl’s room, vanishing almost as soon as MT-5927 noticed him.  The mask he always wore seemed to have disappeared, or at least he did not wear it when he visited her.

Of course MT-5927 had seen Kylo Ren without his mask before.

He often thought about that day—there was little else to do on Baudere besides think.  Had he known that day that he would have been exiled to the darkest corner of the galaxy, perhaps his decisions would have been different… or perhaps not.  He was honest enough to admit that he was not a brave man.

Twenty years of training under the First Order had not taught him bravery, nor had it ingrained the unquestioning loyalty in him that it had in his fellow stormtroopers.  He was the veteran of countless re-education sessions-- one couldn’t say that Captain Phasma hadn’t tried her best, but when it became clear that no amount of training or torture could mold him into a First Order Stormtrooper, he was quickly reassigned to the Medical Unit.  The First Order was, after all, anything but wasteful of its resources.

The Medical Unit had been a comfortable fit for him.  There was no one shooting at him, for starters, and he never had to skip meals.  In his leisure hours aboard the Finalizer, he could always find a trooper in the common rooms who might be up for a game of Holo-chess or a hand of Death Star Bluff.

The work was less than demanding as well.  The droids handled patching up most of the Stormtroopers.  Human medics were, in most cases, only at the disposal of the commanding officers.  Droids made decisions based on algorithms, and could not be swayed by screams of discomfort or threats.  If a trooper was too badly damaged, a droid’s assistance might be a quick, painless death.  Of course the officers of the First Order usually only went into a battle once it appeared that victory was imminent, and therefore suffered very few injuries.  Medics, however, still had their uses, and one of those was discretion.  MT-5927 couldn’t count the number of times he’d been approached by a shame-faced officer, just back from leave, who mumbled something about burning pains in their nether regions, and had then asked for a steri-shot or two—off the record, of course.

 Then came the defection of FN-2187, and with that, the foundation of half-truths and justifications the medic had built his life on began to crumble.  It had never happened before, not that he knew of anyway.  A Stormtrooper who had not only deserted, but joined the Resistance to fight against the First Order?  That was madness, surely!

Yet the idea of leaving the First Order stayed with him.  He often found himself imagining different scenarios whereby this might be achieved—usually these day dreams involved him blasting through a wall of white-clad troopers with a gorgeous, scantily-clad Resistance fighter at his side.  There were several problems with this dream.  The first being that many of those troopers were his friends and acquaintances.  The second was a shortage of gorgeous, scantily-clad, Resistance prisoners, and the third… well, he was not a brave man after all.

He had been asleep in his bunk at the time Starkiller Base had been destroyed, and awoke to the wail of the siren signaling the approach of ships bearing the wounded.  He’d made it to sick bay just as the first survivors were rushed in.  There weren’t many.  There weren’t many at all, and he soon learned the reason why.  The time between the evacuation order and the planet’s implosion was only minutes.  The First Order had lost almost every trooper stationed on Starkiller.

Not Captain Phasma though, and not General Hux, and certainly not Kylo Ren.  That was the first time MT-5927 saw the Knight’s face, the day he was carried in by General Hux’s private guard, and dropped unceremoniously on the gurney before him.  The lightsaber wound which ran the length of his face, seemed even more pronounced against the sickly pallor of his skin.

“If he dies,” General Hux informed him, “So do you.”

When DD-13 burned away the cloth from his torso, 5927 flinched.  It wasn’t just the gaping hole in the man’s side, his chest, and as the medic later discovered, back and arms were covered in scars. 

DeeDee’s outdated catalogue of battle wounds came in handy that day. 5927 had never seen a bowcaster wound before.  The hole in Kylo’s side had been made when a bowcaster shot a metal quarrel encased in plasma energy directly through him—it was amazing that the man had lived, and continued fighting by the look of him.

He did, however recognize wounds made by a lightsaber, though he knew not to ask questions.  Among the officers of the First Order, Kylo Ren was known as the Jedi Killer.

The Knight had healed slowly, even submerged in a Bacta Tank, and when at last he had regained his mobility, he’d immediately boarded a command shuttle at the behest of the Supreme Leader, and gone to Baudere, and as he was not at that time fully healed, MT-5927 had been ordered to accompany him.

A year had passed.  An entire year on the dark planet with no orders and no company save for DD-13.  His assignment had officially changed at some point from the care of Kylo Ren to the medic assigned to the Citadel on Baudere, but it made little difference.  The acolytes never required his services.  They were ambitious when it came time to prove their worth before the Knights of Ren, each hoping to advance to the position of apprentice.  In that quest, they maimed and murdered one another with a regularity that was almost comical, but never acknowledged that such things happened to themselves or others.  To seek medical care would mean official documentation of such incidents and no one wanted that.

And so, MT-5927 slept a great deal, and thought, and played cards with DD-13, and thought some more.  The girl was his first case since Kylo Ren.

On the third day since her arrival in his empty sick bay, he awoke early, and felt something almost like anticipation.  Perhaps her fever had subsided during the night.  Perhaps she would be awake.  Perhaps she would feel like talking.

He dressed quickly, and opted to forgo breakfast too check the status of his patient, but did take the time to access the morning reports.  It was with no small amount of interest that he noted the departure of a certain commanding officer from the base.  His curiosity piqued, he hurried into the corridor.  He had almost reached the sick bay when he ran into several acolytes in the hallway.  The door to Kylo Ren’s private quarters was flung wide, and he could see acolytes inside as well.  They appeared to be working at removing the wreckage of what was once furniture from his rooms.  As they carried out the still smoking pieces of a small table, MT-5927 winced.  He had seen Kylo Ren’s anger before.  Something had set him off.

When he continued on his way, his steps were much quicker.

 

The girl was awake.

He paused in the doorway for a moment, taking in the sight of her small frame seated on the floor in a position of meditation.  Her eyes were closed.

“DD-13,” he called.  “The patient is awake.  Bring food… water… bring something.”

The girl did not open her eyes at the sound of his voice.  MT-5927 cleared his throat loudly as he crossed the floor to her.

“Who are you?” she asked, her voice guarded.

“MT-5927.  I’m a medic— _the_ medic here on Baudere.  What is your name?  Where are you from?  Can you remember what happened to you?”

She opened her eyes at last, and one eyebrow quirked upward as though suspicious of his many questions.  He would have to do a better job of pacing himself.

‘Your name?” he asked again, making an attempt at a friendly smile.

“Where is he?” she asked, ignoring his question completely.

MT-5927 knew without asking what ‘he’ the girl was referring to.  By the tone of her voice, he inferred that the Knight and this girl were not on good terms.

“Gone.  Kylo Ren left on a mission sometime during the night.  You’re safe here… for now.”

“If you want me to feel safe here, perhaps you might return my weapon,” she said.

“I’m not… well, I’m certainly not authorized to do that,” he explained.

DD-13 fortunately chose that moment to arrive with a tray of food, and 5927 seized the opportunity to change the subject.

“I’m afraid that light fare is all we can offer you at this time.  Your body shows signs of long term malnourishment and I think it would be best if you stuck to liquids and soft foods for the time being.  If you handle that well, we can certainly add meat and other more substantial nourishment.  I’ve brought you a broth to start.”

“How do I know it isn’t drugged?” she asked.

5927 scratched at his head thoughtfully.

“Well, I haven’t been given any orders to drug you—not that I could even if I was ordered to.  We’re terribly under-supplied here.  We’ve run through our entire stock of Bacta treating you, and we don’t even have standard equipment like body-temperature regulators.  I wouldn’t know where I’ even find the sort of drugs you’re talking about,” he admitted.

She studied him as he spoke, and her expression slowly melted from outright suspicion to reluctant acceptance.

“Where did he go?” she asked, “Kylo Ren, I mean.  What missions has he been sent on?”

“I can’t answer that.”

“You mean you won’t answer it.”

“No.  I mean I can’t.  I’m not important enough to be told things like that.  In fact, I’m probably the least important Stormtrooper in the entire history of the First Order.”

She smirked at this, and then shook her head, and gave a short wary laugh.

“I’m Rey,” she said, “Nice to meet you, I think.”

“MT-5927,” he said reaching out to shake her hand, “and this is DD-13.”

“You don’t look like a Stormtrooper,’ she decided.

“It’s the armor, isn’t it?  I don’t have the armor, so it’s hard to believe, but technically, I am still a Stormtrooper.  Medics are still part of the ranks, we just don’t wear the armor.  What’s your rank?”

“I don’t have one,” she shrugged, “but if I did, I don’t think I would rank very high.”

“Are you a Resistance Fighter?” he asked.  He could feel his cheeks burn at his own audacity.

“I suppose I am.”

“Why are you here?  What happened?  Were you captured?  Were you trying to assassinate Kylo Ren?”

She stared levelly back at him, and he realized at once that she had no reason to trust him, and would not be answering any of his questions.  Disappointed, he sat down in the chair beside her bed, and stared back.

“Can I at least hope that you know how to play Holo-chess or Death Star Bluff?” he asked.

She smirked at this.

“I might,” she admitted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your kind comments, and kudos. I really appreciate the support-- it keeps me going ;) I hope to have the next chapter up by Friday.


	11. Homecoming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. Hope you all enjoy!

She watched his face carefully as he removed the bandages.  They might have been playing cards for all his expression gave away, but she could see for herself when he unwrapped it, that her foot was not healing as it should.

“A few more days, and we should see some improvement,” the medic nodded to himself.

Rey said nothing as he finished wrapping the clean dressing and tossed the soiled bandages into the waste chute.  He went immediately to his desk and called up a map on the holodisplay.  Although she did not recognize the system, she had figured out that he was using it to track ships moving across it.  His face was easier to read during these times.  There was definitely something worrying him.

“You always do that,” she sighed.

“What?”

“Whenever you finish a dressing change, you call up that map and stare at it.  What are you looking for?”

“Nothing… nothing—just a resupply ship.  It isn’t important,” he lied.

Rey slowly shifted her legs so that they hung over the edge of the table, and slid off, making sure to bear the weight on her good foot.  A makeshift crutch leaned against the wall, and she snatched it, jamming it under her arm so that she could hobble over to stand beside him.

“Is it running late?” she asked, glancing toward the small, dark planet that floated before them.

“What?”

“The resupply ship—is it overdue?”

“A little.”

“And you’re waiting for something that it’s supposed to bring.  Is that it?” she guessed.

His silence confirmed her suspicion.

“What is it?”

“Nothing important,” he repeated, flicking off the display.

“Bacta,” she realized, glancing down at her foot.  “Its Bacta isn’t it?  You only had three units and you used them all on me.”

“Supply ships are important for MANY reasons when you live on a rock in the middle of nowhere,” he countered.  “We could use more Bacta, certainly, but food and water are just as precious.”

“Except that we have food and water—at least, as far as I know.  It’s my wound, isn’t it?  It isn’t healing like it should.”

“Another unit or two of Bacta would help,” he shrugged.

“Where does your supply ship come from?” she asked, trying to make her voice sound off-hand, as though she were only attempting to make light conversation.

“A First Order stock-pile on an uncharted planet.  Why?”

“Just curious, I guess.  Do you sup-“

She was cut off by the flashing off a red light on the holodisplay console, and the sudden appearance of DD-13.

“Incoming transmission.  Signal detected from Transport 009.  Signal is HoloNet compatible,” the droid informed them.

“If you don’t mind…” MT-5927 said, jerking his head toward the door.

“I thought you weren’t important enough to be told anything of interest,” Rey said, quirking an eyebrow.

“I’m not.  Really, it’s just… it’s probably nothing…but it’s against protocol to… to…”

His voice trailed off uncertainly as she settled herself comfortably in his chair, far enough from the holodisplay to be out of view, and glanced expectantly at him.  He seemed to struggle with something silently for a moment before squaring his jaw, and hitting the projector button on the console.  He gave Rey a quick wink as the transmission flickered and sharpened into focus, and for a moment, he reminded her of someone she missed very much.  It was strange that she had never noticed it before.

The mask of a storm trooper materialized on the screen, as MT-5927 cleared his throat.

“Eight-one,” the medic greeted him.  “It’s been awhile.”

“Not long enough to warrant 17 high priority status checks,” the trooper snapped back.  “We were stopped on Bespin for three days.  The Resistance attacked the stronghold there—“

Rey’s heart leapt in her chest.  She wondered who among her friends had been on the raiding party.  Had they been successful?  What were they after?  What was General Organa up to?  It was hard to keep her mouth shut and stay in her seat.  Sensing her reaction, the medic glanced warily in her direction.

“How bad was the damage to the stockpile?” he asked.

“Bad enough.  You’ll see for yourself when the supplies arrive.  You should know ahead of time, that yours isn’t the only post that’ll see tightened rations.”

“What about the Bacta?” 5927 asked.

“No one’s getting Bacta.  Not even the officers.  I saw a commander’s transport land a few hours after the attack.  He demanded 20 units, but there wasn’t anything left.  All our medical stock was destroyed, and the weapons cache was pretty thoroughly looted too.  They’re still cleaning up the mess down there.”

“Then why don’t we order direct from Thyferra?”

“Do you really think we haven’t tried?  General Hux sent the order right after the attack.  He asked for anything they had on hand on Thyferra to be sent to the Finalizer.  They refused!”

“Wait a minute,” 5927 rubbed his forehead as though it pained him.  “You’re saying that the Zaltin Corporation is refusing to fill orders for the First Order now?  They’ve been under contract to us for years.”

“Not anymore.  Their factory was attacked shortly after the raid on Bespin.  The rumor is that a force-user fought their way through twenty armed security droids, and a unit of clones, and destroyed half the facility in the process.  All that and they only made off with maybe a dozen or so Bacta units.”

“So why cut ties with the First Order?” 5927 demanded.

“They’re saying that the thief boarded one of our ships.  Not to worry, Five-nine. We’ll send them a convincing reason to continue our agreement very soon.  For now though, there’s a hold on all Bacta units ordered.  No one is getting any.”

MT-5927 cursed under his breath.  He did not make eye contact with Rey.

“We’ll dock in a few hours,” eight-one informed him.

“Right,” the medic nodded, and hit the button which killed the transmission.

He turned to face Rey, though he still did not meet her eye.

“It seems your friends have made things harder on us,” he sighed.  There was no malice in his pronouncement.  He merely sounded tired.

Rey watched him shrewdly as he put away his tools and hunted through his desk for the now familiar pack of cards.

“You remind me of someone,” she said.

“Oh?”

“My friend, Finn.  He was like you once.”

“You’re talking about the traitor, FN-2187.”

“He was a Stormtrooper.”

“You think I’m ready to turn traitor and fight the First Order?” the medic smirked.  “Come on, now, all I did was allow you to sit in on a transport status check with a low level unit chief.”

“And when he told you that they were attacked, you didn’t ask why, or what the casualties were.  All you cared about was the Bacta.  You asked him about the damage to the stockpile, that was all.”

“I’m still a soldier.  I’m trained to think like one, to focus only on what I need.”

“You’re a soldier who doesn’t believe in what he’s fighting for,” she decided.

“Maybe I don’t believe that anything’s worth fighting for,” he scoffed, sitting down to shuffle the cards.

“You’re wrong.”

“Am I?  What are you fighting for, and just whom are you fighting?”

“To defend the weak, to protect those that can’t protect themselves, to bring order from chaos, to stop the First Order from destroying more life—“

“And to do that you’ll fight the First Order, is that right?”

“When I must.”

“Would it surprise you to learn that the goal of the First Order is to bring order to the Galaxy—to achieve peace among all the peoples in it?”

“That’s a lie.  They’ve destroyed entire planets—millions of lives, gone.  You don’t really believe their goal is peace.  Whether you’ll admit it or not, their goal is power over others.”

MT-5927 frowned as he cut the deck and shuffled it together.  He dealt the cards into two piles.  Annoyed, Rey shoved her hand to the side without glancing at it.

“You don’t have to rot here,” she hissed, lowering her voice.

“Careful, what you say,” he cautioned.  “You can’t trust me, after all.”

“You could be free,” she whispered, looking him directly in the eyes.  “You could escape, and go so far from here that they’d never find you.”

“I couldn’t,” he mumbled.

“Why?  You know that what they do isn’t right.  You want out, I can sense it.”

“To think about something—to dream about it even, is one thing.  To act is something else entirely.  I’m not a rebel.  I’m not a fighter, not really.  How do you think I ended up a medic?  I’m a coward, of course,” his last words were tinged with bitterness.

“You choose to save lives rather than take them.  That’s not cowardice, that’s compassion.”

His hand shook as he reached for the cards he’d dealt himself.  She knew enough about Finn’s past to guess what his own experiences had been like.  Even if she had the use of her Jedi powers, she wouldn’t have used them.  He would have to decide for himself.

“I’m not a prisoner, or so I’ve been told. No one would stop us if we went to the hanger right now.  If they did, you’d only have to say that you were going to meet the resupply ship.  We could steal a-“

“There is no hanger.  There are no transports even.  Ships only land to deliver goods or people.  The only ones who have permission to come and go at will are the Knights.  Once an acolyte is dropped here, they stay until they become a Knight or die trying.  Even a First Order medic like me would need a flightpass approved by a captain or better to board a transport, and the resupply ships have life support scanners that would alert them to anyone trying to stowaway.  There’s no escape from this planet.”

Rey grinned and reached for her cards.  It was a start, a confession that he’d thought about it at least.

“There’s a way,” she nodded.  “There’s always a way.”

The opening of the sickbay door alerted them both to an unexpected presence. One of the ubiquitous black-robed acolytes entered, carrying a shapeless bundle which clinked as he walked.  He dropped his parcel on the gurney and bowed his head quickly.

“Resupply order for medical unit,” he informed them.

“Resupply order?” MT-5927 asked.  “But I just spoke with the transport.  They’re hours from here.  What do you mean?”

The acolyte bowed his head again and left without an answer.

Rey and the medic exchanged a long glance before he stood up to inspect the delivery.  As he untied the fabric parcel, her breath caught in her throat.  She recognized the material—its weave and frayed edges— she could almost feel the fabric against her cheek and the warmth of his back that radiated from it.  Had he returned?

“It’s Bacta,” 5927 mumbled.

 

*             *             *

 

She wasn’t sure how many hours had passed since his arrival, and still he had not come to the medical unit.  MT-5927 had wasted no time in submerging her foot in a makeshift Bacta bath—even injecting the site of the injury before doing so.  20 units had been delivered in total, which suggested that the First Order had indeed been involved in the attack of the Zaltin Corporation, though neither of them acknowledged it out loud.

When the resupply ship arrived, MT-5927 took his leave, and Rey returned to her room, minus her crutch.  The Bacta had healed her foot almost entirely.  Dinner came with DD-13—another weak broth with rehydrated vegetables, which she took her time eating.

And still he had not come.  Yet she did not doubt that he was near.  She could feel him there—that beat, faint but insistent, a cadence that matched the rhythm of her own heart.  Could he not feel it as well?  Did he ignore it?

Rey realized that her foot tapped unconsciously against the floor, matching it.  She stood and paced the floor of her small room.  Her foot still tingled from the Bacta injection, but the pain was gone.  She should go for a walk!  Certainly, she should.  After all, she had been cooped up within the sick bay for days with her injury and had never gotten the lay of the place.  It would be good to stretch her legs, and to familiarize herself with her prison.

But upon reaching the outer corridor, the faint beat of his presence grew stronger, and she followed it, knowing that truly it had been her intention from the start, and soon she had reached a somewhat familiar hall and found herself outside a somewhat familiar door.  She had been to these rooms before.

She stood outside that door for some time, feeling his presence, and knew that she was waiting for him to acknowledge her there.  At any moment she expected the door to open—but it did not, and that made her angry.

She reached for the access pad, expecting it to be encoded, and when the door actually opened at her touch, she gasped and almost fled.  It was the sight of tall, black boots, empty and placed beside the doorway which kept her rooted to the spot.  Another piece of his façade abandoned, perhaps, a reminder that Kylo Ren actually was human.

Though his empty boots suggested his presence inside, she could not see him from where she stood, and so, nervously, she stepped inside.

His long, black tunic lay discarded on the bed—not folded neatly or laid out, but tossed there quite heedlessly, and it was then, before her eyes even fell upon him, that Rey realized she had made a grave mistake.

Kylo Ren stood in the doorway leading to the fresher.  Tendrils of damp hair clung to his neck and face, and his naked chest glistened wetly.  He was clad only in loose-fitting pants, and had paused in the act of wrapping his shoulder in gauze.  When their eyes met, he smirked, as though he could read her thoughts.  Perhaps he could. The realization was enough to draw blood to her cheeks.

“What do you want, scavenger?” he asked.  The absolute calm of his voice told her that he was not at all surprised to see her.  That it was likely he had felt her there, standing outside his door as surely as she had felt him.

He had allowed her to come to him, perhaps to prove some point, she didn’t know, but she felt disgusted with herself.  She cast about for an excuse.

“I wanted to thank you,” she began stiffly, “for the Bacta, I mean.  If it isn’t a good time, I could…”

He shrugged and turned away, as though she were too insignificant to acknowledge.

The gesture irked her.

“Where did you go?” she asked, taking a cautious step forward.  She knew the answer, but still wanted to know why.

“I had other matters to attend to,” he answered shortly, stopping with his back turned to her.

“Other matters?’ she probed, taking another step.

“It isn’t your concern.”

“I thought I was your apprentice,” she scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

“I thought you said you would never be an apprentice to me,” he taunted, and with this he turned to face her, and stepped into the room.

She almost wished he hadn’t.  They were too close, and he was too big and too… too exposed.  Too much skin… too human—much more a man than a monster.  There was something about the curve of his bicep, and the lean, hard quality of his body that made her want to touch him—just to see what it would feel like.  Was he reading her thoughts?  Why did he stare at her in such a way?

When he took another step towards her, she didn’t back away, though she did drop her gaze immediately to her feet, and her face felt hot again.  He leaned down, bringing his face close to hers, and though she did not look up to meet his gaze, she could feel his hot breath against the side of her face.

“What is it, scavenger?” he taunted, his voice low—almost a whisper.  “You don’t wish to kill me any longer?”

“N—not at this exact moment, no,” she stumbled.

He smelled good—clean, and it reminded her that she herself had done little more than clean herself from a bucket for countless days.  She was suddenly embarrassed, desperate to be away from him, yet too stubborn to show it.

“You were eager for me to return,” he guessed, and when she did not deny it, he closed the small amount of space that remained between them by reaching out to lightly stroke the side of her face.  She shivered at the contact.

“Still cold, little jedi?” he whispered, his lips lightly brushed against her earlobe, while his long fingers twined through her hair. He jerked her head up and when his lips met hers it was with a possessive forcefulness that took her breath away.

For a moment she froze, knowing somehow that her lack of response frustrated him, fueled the violent way in which he kissed her and made his hands tighten almost to the point of pain around her shoulders.  

Her thoughts scattered and the only thing she could focus on was the pressure of his mouth as it moved to her neck, and the smell of his hair, and before she could think of the consequences, she reached out to grab a fistful of his wet locks and forced his lips back to hers-- at last returning his kiss with a desire that matched his own.  He moaned low in his throat.  His hands ran the length of her torso, and wrapped around her, squeezing her so tightly against himself, that her thin shift was immediately dampened by his chest.

She didn’t care, and she didn’t care when she felt his hand move lower, running over her bottom which he gripped tightly once before hefting her up.  They were moving.  He was backing her slowly towards… towards his bed, and though she surely knew what he intended, when his hands moved to the hem of her shift, tugging it up, panic gripped her with a startling suddenness.

She cried out, breaking away from his bruising lips, and shoved him roughly.

“Don’t!” she pleaded.  “Stop this.”

He did not move, and she did not dare to look at him, but she could hear his staggered breathing and feel the heat of his body.

“Rey…” he breathed, and his voice was so gentle that it terrified her.  That gentleness might break even her iron clad determination.

“Don’t touch me,” she warned.

He took a step back, and with a deep sigh, his breathing returned to normal.  When she at last dared to glance up at him, he was regarding her with something like an amusement.  It confused her.

“You almost abandoned your jedi training so easily, little scavenger,” he taunted.  “Did you really miss me so much?”

“That was… that was all… all a-a test?” she stuttered.  Her stomach clenched painfully, though anger was quick to make her clench her fist at the same time.

“You are somewhat less malleable than I expected,” he confirmed, “but not strong enough.  You will soon bend to the dark side.”

She drew back her arm, and with one swift movement, punched his face with every bit of strength she had.  His head snapped to the side and he staggered back from the force of her blow.

She stood before him, quivering with rage, wanting to scream, wanting to hit him again, and could not understand why, more than any of those things, she wanted to cry.  She felt the sobs coming, and knew that she wouldn’t be able to stop them.  The least she could accomplish was to hide that weakness from him.

Without another word, she turned and fled the room.


	12. Bargaining

“I have to leave here.  I have to find a way to escape, now!  He truly is a monster!  I cannot abide another minute on the same planet as that… as that…”

Rey stopped pacing to spare a glance toward MT-5927.  He was bent over his desk.  The components of DD-13’s heuristic processor were spread out before him, while the deactivated droid sat slumped over by his side.  The medic frowned in concentration as he carefully pried apart the delicate inner chip compartment.

“Why do I bother?  You aren’t even listening to me,” she sighed.

“I’m listening,” he mumbled without glancing up.  “You despise Kylo Ren… and so on, and so on.”

“What are you doing anyhow?” she growled, dropping into the empty chair beside him.

“A few hours ago, you were cautiously feeling me out about my loyalties.  Now you’re plotting treason in front of me.  What changed?” he asked, ignoring her question completely.

“What do you mean ‘what changed’?  Nothing!  He’s a fiend, and a lying, manipulative, murdering bastard, and I cannot abide another minute in his presence.”

Rey clenched and unclenched her fist.  She had hit him hard enough to leave her own hand sore.  Good!  That meant his face was sore as well.  She hoped she’d at least left a bruise.

Still, she’d half-expected him to respond with one of his tirades. Perhaps, in his rage, even running her down and turning his blade on her.  For a half an hour she’d watched the sick bay door nervously, waiting for his familiar robed figure to come sweeping through and dole out some sort of punishment.  That he had not, suggested that her reaction did not upset him, evil bastard that he was.

“Hmmm,” 5927 replied.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t say ‘nothing’, you were obviously thinking something.”

The medic frowned again, and picked up a pair of tweezers to gently remove the microchip.  Rey waited impatiently for him to speak, her foot tapping nervously on the ground.  When she realized that her foot tapped to the same beat that throbbed faintly in her ears, she forced herself to stop.

“You called out for him when you were sick,” he said at last.

“I was delirious!  I was hallucinating ghosts and voices and his was the last real face I saw.  I was sick and—”

“Hand me that micro-welder,” he interrupted.

“What?  Oh… here.  Anyhow, it doesn’t mean that I… I… wait a minute!  Where did you get that?”

Rey snatched the shiny new chip out of its box and held it up to the light, oblivious to the medic’s growl of frustration.

“The resupply ship, of course.  Now give that here,” he ordered, jabbing at her with the tweezers.

“Really? I recognize the brand—Qwar, isn’t it?  Expensive!  The First Order stocks these?”

“Not usually, no,” he muttered, ignoring Rey’s raised eyebrow.

“Not usually?” she repeated, when he didn’t volunteer an explanation, she laid the chip carefully on the table and leaned back in her chair, studying 5927 as he switched them out.  “DeeDee is an outdated unit.  Interesting that an out-of-date droid who barely sees any action would qualify for such an expensive upgrade,” she noted, careful to keep her voice neutral.

“I paid for it myself,” he admitted.

“That’s interesting.  I didn’t realize the First Order compensates you with credits for your service.”

“They don’t.”

“Which begs the question… how did you pay for it?”

“Resurrection Dust.  Baudere is the only known source in the galaxy of Resurrection Dust.  It’s used in all sorts of things because of certain properties that it has.  If it’s dried and pressed, it can be burned as incense—an incense which makes people hallucinate and, over time, go mad.  It’s also used in certain recreational drugs--”

“5927!  You’re a black market drug dealer?” Rey gasped.

“When you say it that way, it sounds horrible.  Look, you were just saying that it’s imperative that you escape, weren’t you?  That’s going to be very hard to accomplish as it is, but without any resources?  It’s impossible.”

Rey’s attention sharpened at the word ‘escape’.  She leaned forward, close enough that when 5927 glanced over his shoulder and came face-to-face with her, he started in surprise.

“You’re _actually_ thinking about it, aren’t you?  No… you must have been thinking about it even before I said anything,” she grinned.

5927 shrugged.

“Why did you believe it necessary to update DeeDee’s heuristic processor?” she asked.

“Heuristic processors allow droids to learn outside of their programming—to learn from doing and from the humans they’re around.  Some people call it, ‘the personality chip’,” he explained.  “First Order medical droids all come equipped with heuristic processors, however there are very strict limits on what a droid can learn with a standard chip—we wouldn’t want them picking up shoddy procedure from human medics.  Empathy would be a bad thing to learn as well.  After all, depleting limited medical resources because they form an attachment to a bad-off patient, isn’t cost effective.  We also wouldn’t want them to pick up any feelings of disloyalty, and most of all, we don’t want them to learn to lie.

“Years ago, I modified DeeDee’s chip myself.  It isn’t any fun to play Death Star Bluff with a droid incapable of lying, but there is only so much one can do to with a standard chip.  For instance, I can’t obliterate the main directive, which is service to the First Order—“

“But with a new chip,” Rey interrupted.  “He’s free to do as he wishes.  So what’s your plan?”

“Plan?  Who said I had a plan?” 5927 scowled.  “I’m still thinking it over.  Don’t go raising your hopes, I haven’t got the first idea of how to escape.  But, for the sake of argument, if I did decide to plot some daring and elaborate attempt, I wouldn’t want it ruined because my best friend is programmed to rat me out.”

Rey chuckled and leaned back again, crossing her arms behind her head.

“We’re going to get off this rock,” she declared, “It’s too bad I won’t get to see the look on his face when we do!”

5927 leaned over the droid and carefully secured the new chip in place before replacing the head plate.

“There,” he mumbled, and keyed in the sequence to begin the droid’s start-up protocol.

The droid’s body stiffened, and his eyes flashed orange.

“Good Morning, DeeDee,” 5927 greeted him.

“My settings indicate that we are near the end of this station’s wake cycle,” DeeDee replied.

“Welcome back, buddy.”

“If you can get a rare heuristic processor in exchange for this… for this… Resurrection Dust, it must be quite valuable.  Could you get your hands on enough of it to—“

“To bribe my way onto a resupply ship?  Not a chance.  Eight-one might be willing to turn a blind eye to a bit of illegal bartering now and then, but he’s not going to turn rebel.  There’s other things I can trade for that might help though.”

“Like what?” Rey asked.

MT-5927 gave her a quick glance before springing from his chair and heading for the door.  He opened it, stuck his head into the hall, and looked both ways.  Satisfied that no one was nearby, he shut the door, and hurried back to where she sat.  As he leaned over her, Rey almost flinched at his proximity.

He reached into the drawer, pulled out an unmarked glass bottle of golden liquid, and set it proudly on the desk.

“Corellian Whiskey for one.  A bit of liquid courage never hurts,” he said.  “Grab those mugs behind you.”

“Thank-you but—“

“Don’t say you can’t.  I got it because of you, so you know.  You’re Corellian, after all.  Your blood work proves it.”

“I might have been born there, but I don’t remember it.”

“Well this is the best way to be reintroduced,” the Medic insisted, reaching for the mugs himself.

When he poured and shoved a mug across the desk to her, she did not refuse.  What was the harm after all?  5927 lifted his mug and tapped it against hers.

“To your health!” he grinned.

“Right,” she scoffed, but she lifted her mug when he lifted his, and took a sip.

The whiskey burned her throat.  She coughed and shot the medic a dirty look when he chuckled.

“It takes a bit of getting used to, I suppose.  It goes down easier the more you drink,” he offered.

“It takes like acid.  A little more than a bit of getting used to I’d say!”

5927 grinned and topped off her mug.

The two drank in companionable silence with the exception of Rey clearing her throat a few times. She noticed that he told the truth about the whiskey going down easier after awhile.  The back of her throat soon numbed, and beyond that, each sip she took merely warmed her stomach.  Even better, she noticed that when the mug was half emptied, the faint throb in her ears had quieted so that it was barely noticeable, and her mood had improved.

“You can’t possibly like being called MT-5927 all the time,” she said suddenly.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well… it’s… it’s a number, not a name,” she insisted.

“It’s both.”

“Hmmm,” she frowned.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“I thought we’d already established that ‘Hmmm’ means something.”

“Alright,” she chuckled.  “Don’t you have a nickname—something shorter that your friends call you?”

“Five-nine.”

“No.”

“Doc?”

“A little better, but-“

“Brick.  In my old unit, back before I was a medic, my nickname was Brick.”

“Brick?  Why?”

“Because Captain Phasma used to say that I was about as useful in battle as a brick tied to her foot.”

Rey laughed, but noticing the glare he shot her way, attempted to turn it into a cough.

“Sorry.  I like Brick.  Brick is good.  It’s strong.  You need Brick if you’re going to build anything.  It’s better than 5927 at any rate.”

He leaned towards her to clink mugs again, but glancing down, noticed that hers had almost emptied.

“One more?” he suggested.

“No.  Thank-you but no.  It’s late, and I should sleep.  Kylo Ren thinks that he’s going to train me as his apprentice.  I’ll let him believe that while we find a way off this rock, but I need rest if I’m to keep my guard up around him.”

5927 stretched and stood, slid the whiskey bottle back into the drawer and locked it.  Rey followed him to the hallway leading back to the recovery wing, still holding her mug, but as she walked, she realized that her head felt strangely light, and the room seemed to list ever so slightly.  She stumbled sideways to account for it, lost her balance, and threw her hand out to catch herself.

The mug smashed against the counter, slicing her hand and drenching the sleeve of her shift in whiskey.  The alcohol burned a little against her fresh wound, mixing with the blood to run down her hand and arm.  Strange that it didn’t hurt more for all it bled.

“Clumsy!”  She said the word as though it were a curse, and squeezed her hand tightly to stop the bleeding.  When 5927 attempted to survey the damage, she hid it behind her back.  “No way, Brick!  You’ll probably want to amputate!”

“Ha!  Give it here.  Let’s see,” he ordered.

“It’s a scratch.  Hand me one of those towels and help me back to my room.  I think the floor’s a bit uneven.”

“Don’t be a tough patient, now.  I’ve got Bacta, thanks to your good friend, Kylo.  It won’t take a minute to—“

“I’m tired. You can look at it when I wake up.  It doesn’t even hurt, _really_.”  Truthfully, it didn’t hurt, and she could almost forget it was there at all, if not for the ticklish sensation of the blood running down her arm.  How funny!  Rey giggled.

“Give us a look, Rey.  Don’t make me call DeeDee over to hold you down,” he teased.

Rey stuck out her tongue and backed away.  When he lunged for her, she easily dodged his half-hearted attempt to grab her, but again lost her balance and slammed her shoulder against the wall.

“Owww!” she complained, and giggled again.

“You’re drunk,” he informed her.  “For a Corellian, you sure don’t have much of a—“

“Sssshhh…”Rey warned.  “Do you hear that?”

“What?” he asked, and cocked his head to the side, listening.

“Like somebody playing a drum, louder and louder and lou—“

The medic used her distraction to lunge again, this time snatching her bloody wrist and yanking her upright.

“Sneaky!” Rey accused, giggling while he used his free hand to pry her fingers apart.

The door slid open and the two froze.  The drum beat in Rey’s ears merged with the stomp of Kylo Ren’s boots as he slowly crossed the room to where they stood.

For an instant she could see everything through his eyes: the pieces of a broken mug on the floor.  The smell of whiskey.  The blood streaming down her arm and dripping to the floor, and the way 5927 gripped her wrist, as though they were struggling against one another before the door opened.

Her eyes travelled up the length of his black-robed body to the familiar and hated mask beneath his cowl.  She opened her mouth, but before she could form a word, his light saber blazed to life in his hand.  The fiery beam spun upward, and as he swung down, she managed to scream:

“NOOO!”

The end of his saber stopped only a hair from 5927’s neck.  Eyes wide, her friend swallowed thickly, staring fixedly at the flickering point before him.

“No!” she repeated.  “It’s not… it isn’t what you think.  He was trying to help me!”

She pulled on 5927’s arm, forcing him to back-step from the threatening end of Kylo’s light saber, but the Knight advanced with them, holding his blade steady.

“Please don’t hurt him,” she pleaded.  “Please don’t.  He hasn’t done anything wrong.”

Rey tried to step in front of him, putting herself between the medic and the threat of having his head sliced off, but with the flick of his wrist, Kylo Force threw her to the side.

Rey hit the floor and rolled to a crouch. Glancing up, she saw his gloved hand tighten around the hilt.  He was going to do it.

“NO!” she screamed against. “Please no!  I’ll do whatever you say!  I’ll be your apprentice.  I won’t fight you,” she bargained.

“You just can’t seem to keep your hands off the Stormtroopers, can you?” he demanded, his voice artificially deeper and somewhat metallic.

“I’ll be your apprentice-- Your real apprentice.  I’ll do as you say.  I’ll train,” she pleaded.  “Please…”

“Get… out…” he hissed through the modulator.

MT-5927 swallowed again and shot Rey a panicked glance.

“Go,” she whispered.  “Just go now, Brick, please.”

Slowly, the medic sidled away from the blade and backed toward the door.  Kylo Ren continued to stand completely still, his light saber now threatening empty space.

“Go!” Rey repeated, fearful that at any minute, Kylo Ren would change his mind and swing his blade around to cut the man in half.

5927 nodded and hurried for the door.  When it slid shut behind him, Kylo’s arm dropped to his side, and the terrifying blade disappeared.  He turned to face her, and she winced with the first step he took.

“Get up,” he growled. 

When she didn’t move fast enough, his hand shot forward and snatched her wrist, yanking her roughly to her feet.  He did not let go, but brought her hand up to his mask, so that she could see the faint reflection of her bleeding hand in his visor.

“I was going to bed,” she explained.  “I tripped, and it’s… well, it barely hurts.  I can have it looked at in the morning.”

He dropped her arm.

“You won’t be back in the morning.  Your training starts now.  Grab that towel and follow me.”

“Where are we going?” Rey asked, wrapping the towel around her injured hand.

“As my apprentice, you’ll be given the rooms next to mine.”

“I… I’m fine here… here in sick bay,” she stuttered.  “I don’t mind.”

“If you defy me now, scavenger, I will band you again, and you will sleep on the floor by my feet.  Chose.”

She ducked her head in quick agreement.  She could feel the anger in him, just the way she had felt it in the moments before she met the Chaata.  He was on the verge of uncontrollable rage, and if she refused him now, he might change his mind and go after the medic.

“Follow me,” he repeated.

As he swept from the room, Rey followed meekly in his wake.

They passed out of the medical wing and back through the main hall, to the corridor where she knew his rooms to be.  He stopped at an unmarked door, beside the one she had fled through earlier in the evening, and touched the access pad.  The door slid open, and Rey found herself in rooms that were almost identical to his own.

At least that meant she’d have her own fresher, and with any luck, a shower.  Kylo Ren, however, did not immediately leave, and as he stood beside her, silent and still, she caught herself staring at his mask.

So he was wearing his helmet again.  He no longer wanted her to see his face.  That could mean that she had indeed injured him earlier, or it might mean that he wanted to intimidate her.  If that was so, his silence was doing well enough at that.

“I… I’ll sleep then, I suppose,” she said, her voice cracking at the end.

“You will begin your training when you wake,” he informed her.  “We’ll start with basic light saber forms—testing you to see what you’ve already learned from Skywalker.”

“Testing me,” she repeated, and her thoughts flashed immediately to earlier in the evening, when they had stood in an identical room, tightly pressed together as he moaned against her lips.  Her face grew hot.

“If this is going to work,” she began, “you need to start treating me like a real apprentice.  No more lies, no more mind games or tricks.”

Kylo Ren did not face her, but did tilt his head slightly to the side.

“I will push you.  I will test you,” he answered.

“That’s fine.  I expect that, but what you won’t do, is touch me.  Don’t kiss me, or put your hands on me.  I am your apprentice, and even a sith would not take advantage of his apprentice in such a way.”

“I am not a sith!” he snapped.

“Perhaps not, but I certainly don’t think your master trained you the way you’ve attempted to train me.  At least I hope he hasn’t.”

Kylo Ren considered her words silently for a moment.  With his face hidden behind the mask, she had no idea how he took her request.  Was he annoyed… angered?

“Very well,” he answered calmly, “and in return, you will speak only to me, learn only from me, and do only what I tell you to do.  If I catch you in the medical wing, or anywhere near MT-5927, I will not hesitate to kill him.”

“That hardly seems fair—“

“I WILL BAND YOU LIKE A SLAVE AND NOT ALLOW YOU TO MOVE ONE STEP FROM MY SIDE!” He threatened, his artificial voice rising to its loudest setting.

“Fine!” she snapped.  “I’ll be ready when you send for me, but right now, I’m tired.”

Beneath the mask, he was staring at her, she was certain.  He was purposefully not taking the hint to leave her in peace, and she wondered if he was secretly considering banding her anyhow.

“I’ll do as you say,” she agreed though gritted teeth.  “I suppose you were right.  It is better if I hate you.”

He considered her for a moment more, and then without another word, left the room.  His footsteps echoed down the hall, and though she listened, she did not hear his door open.

It was hours later, as she lay in her bed after a long shower, trying to fall asleep, that she heard him return.  Through the wall shared by their rooms, came the faint sound of a door sliding open, and then his muffled but heavy boots crossing the floor.  Silence then, and she imagined that he was sitting down, removing his mask and boots.  Her thoughts were interrupted by a feral growl, and then the sound of a light saber destroying every piece of furniture it touched.

Rey sighed and covered her head with her pillow.


	13. Sparring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! I was binge watching Stranger Things on Netflix. I'll do better this week, I promise!

_She recognized Starkiller Base immediately—though the angle seemed all wrong.  The girl was close, she could faintly feel the pull that the young force user did not realize emitted.  The girl could not hide for long._

_“Ben!”_

_The shout was pained, and echoed loudly through the chamber.  She froze, overwhelmed by a tidal wave of conflicting emotions._

_No.  Why?  Why here? Why now?  Why couldn’t he have stayed out of it?  She’d known the minute she’d spotted the Millennium Falcon, daringly crashed above the edge of the Eastern Rim, that the time had finally come.  She would face Han Solo and prove her loyalty… or perhaps not. The light was beckoning to her once again—promising impossible scenarios of things she rarely allowed herself to consider._

_She turned to face the man standing at the end of the walkway._

_“Han Solo.  I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time.”  Her voice was distorted and hollow._

_The sound of his slow, deliberate footsteps as he made his way down the bridge caused her to cringe beneath the mask.  When had he grown so old?_

_“Take off that mask.  You don’t need it,” Han demanded._

_“What do you think you’ll see if I do?” she countered._

_“The face of my son!”_

_Han stopped and waited—still far enough away that he could run.  The old man had not lost his caution.  She reached up and unlatched the helmet, lowering it slowly as they regarded one another in silence._

_“Your son is gone,” she warned him. “He was weak and foolish like his father.  So I destroyed him.”_

_Han took a few more ambling steps forward.  He was still moving slowly, careful to maintain eye contact, as though he was afraid she would spook._

_“That’s what Snoke wants you to believe, but it’s not true. My son is alive!” Han growled._

_Relief washed over her, and in that instant something deep within her awoke—a voice which struggled against her, desperate to cry out, ‘I AM here.  I am still here!’  How was it that Han could be so certain?  The man who had never really known her—never even tried.  She would NOT be seduced!_

_“No.  The Supreme Leader is wise,” she insisted, though there was hesitance in her voice now, and Han surely sensed it._

_“Snoke is using you for your power,” he said.  He was closer now, too close.  “When he gets what he wants he’ll crush you.”_

_Han stopped directly in front of her. Close enough that she could reach out and—_

_She began to take a step back, but stopped herself.  She had to face this._

_“You know it’s true,” Han observed._

_“It’s too late,” she whispered.  She was shaking now, as two wills battled inside of her._

_“No it’s not.  Leave here with me and come home,” Han paused and his eyes bored into hers.  “I miss you.”_

_With those words, something within her ripped.  The pain was real and visceral.  That voice from before, the one which insisted Han Solo was ‘father’, cried out that it could all end now.  She saw a way out._

_“I’m being torn apart!” she gasped.  “I want to be free of this pain.  I know what I have to do, but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it.  Will you help me?”_

_“Yes.  Anything.”_

_She released the helmet, and it clunked loudly against the floor.  Carefully, she removed her lightsaber from her belt and offered it to him with both hands.  She was not strong enough to do it, but Father would be.  Father was no Jedi.  He would do what Uncle Luke could not._

_Han placed his hand over the lightsaber, confused, but ready.  As she turned the emitter towards herself, Father’s eyes grew wide and horrified.  He gripped the hilt, fighting against her, trying to turn it away._

_They stared into each others eyes, arguing without words as the hilt shook with the force of the struggle between them._

_Han Solo would not give her peace.  He was not strong enough to understand that killing her was the only way to stop her.  He was weak and foolish, like Skywalker._

_The struggle inside her head stopped as she twisted her wrist the other way, and ignited the blade._

_The light saber slashed though him, and he slumped forward, the shock evident on his face.  It was done, she thought, exhaling a shaky breath.  She had finally chosen.  The traitorous voice within her went immediately silent, as though she had finally managed to kill it along with Han Solo.  For the first time since she could remember, she felt peace._

_“Thank you,” she breathed, yanking the blade out. Angry sparks flew from his flesh with the force of her withdraw.  From somewhere above, the scavenger’s horrified scream rang out, as with his last ounce of strength, Han Solo lifted one shaking hand and laid it gently against the side of her face._

_A new pain started within her, clenching her stomach, making her want to throw up, trying to force its way out of her mouth as a sob or a scream.  What have we done?  WHAT HAVE WE DONE?_

_This was not peace!  The Supreme Leader lied.  Han’s death was not a reprieve for them._

_The man she had called Father took one last breath and fell… backwards into the abyss._

_She heard a sound then that she had only heard once before—the cry of a wookie in deep anguish.  Before she could react, a searing pain shot through her side, stealing her breath away.  She fell to her knees, clutching the bleeding hole that had torn through her._

_And then the room exploded._

_She glanced up and was horrified to see herself standing on the balcony.  That feeling of horror was at odds with another feeling—not her own.  The feeling of relief that the scavenger girl was alive and close, but as her eyes passed to the figure standing beside the girl, she was seized with rage.  Beside the girl, THEIR girl… was the traitor.  The traitor who had caused all of this to happen.  The traitor who had no doubt been the one to bring Han Solo to his death.  The traitor who now clutched the girl’s hand and pulled her away.  The traitor who was going to take everything from them._

_No!  She would not let that happen.  She would not lose the girl.  She had allowed the traitor to live once.  She would not make that mistake again._

Rey awoke as a faint scream died on her lips.  She sat up and flung the covers off, leaping immediately to her feet.

Her heart was racing, her mind a confused stew of memories real and imagined—but then the dream had seemed so real, all of it!  The expression on Han’s face would be stamped forever in her mind. 

She reached up to swipe at her blurry eyes and realized that she was crying, that it was as if he had died all over again, and Finn!  Seeing Finn, even through eyes clouded with hate, was enough to remind her of how much she missed him, and Poe, and Chewie, and—

Rey sucked in a sharp breath and covered her face with her hands.  She would NOT break down!  All of those people, her friends, were waiting for her to come home.  Perhaps they were even looking for her.  Maybe that was what they were doing during the raid on the First Order stronghold.

At any rate, she had to keep it together.  It was only a dream.  Finn was alive, and far away where Kylo Ren could not hurt him.  These were only memories, things which had already happened.

She sat down on the bed, and began to massage her forehead.

Did Kylo Ren always dream of the past?  Why was it that she only seemed to be able to enter his head while she was sleeping?  Was she using the dark side of the Force unknowingly?  And why did her head hurt so terribly?

Although she laid back down, she was not able to fall asleep again.  Her mind returned time after time to the moment when Kylo Ren ignited his blade, killing Han Solo.  Though strangely, she was starting to feel faint stirrings of pity for the monster.  There was at least a small part of him that hadn’t wanted to kill his father.  In fact, if what she had seen was truly his memory, there was a part of him that would have preferred dying over murdering his father.  Also, there was that moment—that brief few seconds, when Han had reached up to touch the face of his son for the last time, and Kylo had felt real and true horror at what he’d done.

She wondered, not for the first time, if he was somewhat mad.

She was still lost in her thoughts when the door opened, and DD-13 announced himself by asking if she was awake.

“I am, yes!” she agreed, sitting up quickly.  “Where’s Brick, DeeDee?”

“MT-5927 is unable to attend to you this morning due to a no contact order from a superior officer.  However, I am fully capable of assessing and treating any wound with a severity level of 1 to 4, independently.  Please extend your hand, patient.”

Rey dutifully held her hand out to the droid.  It had long since ceased to bleed, but trying to straighten her hand caused her to flinch.  DeeDee’s eyes glowed, emitting a wide beam of orange light which swept across the palm of her outstretched hand.

“Right hand wound of approximately 2 scale 3 in length, depth estimate of .02.  Wound severity assessment level 2,” DeeDee announced.  “Suggested treatment, one quarter unit of Bacta administered by injection at site.”

“It was Kylo Ren wasn’t it?” Rey guessed.  “He ordered Brick not to have any contact with me, didn’t he?”

“I am unable to confirm the origination of the no contact order,” DeeDee replied.

Rey flinched again as DeeDee’s needle shot forward and stabbed into her hand.  The injection stung, but she forgot that after a few seconds as her healing wound began to itch.

“At two hours past the start of the last sleep cycle, Commander Ren entered the Med Bay and spoke with MT-5927 for exactly 7 minutes,” DeeDee continued.  “There were no droids present and no record made at the time of this meeting.  I was informed of the no contact order directly after this meeting occurred.”

Rey smirked.  Perhaps the new chip was already beginning to work.  DeeDee was offering information that he didn’t have to, to someone who was not a member of the First Order.

“DeeDee, if I had a message for Brick, would you be able to deliver it to him without informing anyone else?” she asked.

DD-13 rescanned her hand, and apparently satisfied with the improvement, released its grip on her.

“My intent and abilities are occasionally incompatible,” the droid informed her. “I can deliver a message covertly, however, my memory chip is removable and readable to any officer with a ranking higher than squad leader.”

Rey nodded her understanding.

“I get it.  Look, would you just tell him… tell him that I’m sorry about what happened last night, and that he should… he should know that nothing has changed.  Can you tell him that for me?”

“I can.  Would you like me to-“

DeeDee’s question was interrupted by the door opening, and the arrival of one of the ubiquitous black-robed acolytes.  He carried a parcel tied in black cloth which he set reverently on the table before giving her a short, stiff bow.

“Armor for Lord Ren’s new apprentice,” he hissed as he backed away.

Before she could ask him anything, he was gone.

“Armor, huh?” Rey scoffed, flexing her newly healed hand.  “I hope he doesn’t think I’m going to wear one of those ridiculous helmets.”

“If I can be of no further service…” DD-13 excused itself.

“Oh, right.  No, go on.  I’m fine.”

With the droid gone, Rey inspected the contents of the parcel.  There was a hooded robe, made of the same stiff, woven black fabric that Kylo Ren wore, a new pair of boots, and what she assumed was a breastplate made of shiny black metal.

She dressed quickly, pulling the robe over her thin shift.  Catching a glimpse of her reflection in the polished metal face of a cabinet door, Rey shuddered and quickly looked away.  She looked  a great deal like the other acolytes she had seen.

When the knock came on her door, she was ready for it.  She had sensed him approaching.

“You’re awake,” Kylo Ren greeted her.  He paused in the doorway, and from the slight tilt of his helmet, she had the feeling that beneath it, he was looking her over.  When she didn’t reply, he stiffened, almost imperceptibly.  “Come with me,” he ordered.

She followed him through the Citadel without a word.  She had agreed to be his apprentice.  She would wear his ridiculous costume.  She would let him think he’d won, but she didn’t have to be gracious.  She didn’t owe him friendship, or banter.  She would no longer give him the satisfaction of believing that they had anything in common.  She would speak only when spoken to.  It was a small rebellion, a stand against civility, but at least it was something.

The training room was a cavernous space, with tapering walls that curved into an arched ceiling high overhead.  Light radiated from strips along the padded floor as they entered, wreathing the ceiling in shadows, making it seem as though it was farther overhead than it was.  Along the opposite wall a collection of heavy, old-fashioned weapons were arranged neatly in a rack.

Kylo Ren stopped and turned to face her.  The silence between them was deafening.  Was he waiting for her to speak first?  He could wait forever then!  He could—

“There are seven forms of light saber combat developed by the Jedi,” he began.

“There are three!” she corrected him, forgetting her resolve almost immediately.

“Seven…” he repeated and paused.  “Yes, I know what Skywalker teaches.  I trained under him as well.  Luke Skywalker is admittedly, a skilled duelist.  He learned his basic forms from Obi-wan, but he hadn’t the time to learn properly.  He learned forms from instinct, and created the three styles himself.  Forget those.  Now you will be trained properly.  We begin with the first form, Shii-Cho.”

At this he strode past her, to a collection of what she though was old-fashioned metal armor.  With a flick of his wrist, the armor righted itself, standing up to form the shell of a body.  Kylo’s light saber blazed in his hand. 

Turning to see that she was paying attention, he swung his blade in a lazy circle around the armor’s torso.

“We’ll begin with the six zones of attack.  When you master those, we will move on to the three rings of defense,” he said.

Quickly, he demonstrated each attack.  Although Rey paid careful attention, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to remember each of his moves.  When he finished, switched off his blade, she swallowed nervously.

“Well?” he prompted.

“I haven’t got a light saber,” she reminded him.

With an agitated sigh, his arm shot up and his hand stretched toward the rack.  In answer, an old sword rattled free and flew to his hand.  This he tossed at her feet.

“It’s much heavier than a—“

“That’s the point,” he snapped.  “Now pick it up.”

Scowling, Rey did so, and immediately rushed at the armor, bringing the sword down upon its head with all the fury she felt towards him.

The armor clanged and the blade reverberated wildly in her hands, causing her to drop it.

Kylo Ren sighed again—a strange distorted sound coming through his modifier.

“You can’t kill an empty suit of armor,” he reminded her, “the point of this exercise is to learn the appropriate striking marks.  Force is unnecessary.”

Flushing, and gritting her teeth to keep from replying, she picked up the sword, and swung it toward the right arm of the armor.

“Zone Two,” she muttered as it clanged again.

 

After he was satisfied with her attacks, he taught her the corresponding parrys, using an antiquated sword himself.  Most were familiar to her, and as they went along, she began swinging her sword faster, and faster, hoping that she might catch him off guard, or even drive him back a little.

Unfortunately, he seemed to have no problem blocking each and every one of her thrusts.  With a sudden spark of inspiration, Rey swung to her left and feinted an attack to zone three.  When he moved to block, she swept upward, almost catching him in the armpit, but he was faster.  With his free hand, he caught her sword wrist and twisted it violently, forcing her to drop her weapon.

“That’s _not_ a Shii-Cho attack!” he hissed.

“No.  It isn’t, but if you’re really in a fight you should expect—“

“This is NOT a fight, scavenger.  This is practice, Shii-Cho practice, and you will refrain from-“

“Let’s fight then,” she interrupted.  When he didn’t reply, she swept her sword up and held it defensively in front of her.  “Come on, you said yourself that you wanted to see what I know.  Now is as good a time as any.  Spar with me!”

“I am the Master here!” he growled.

“Prove it then,” she grinned cruelly, “because the last time I remember fighting you—“

With a snarl, he stepped toward her.  His sword flashed, and she moved to block it in the nick of time, stopping the blade mere inches from her face.  She smirked behind their crossed blades as they pushed against one another.

“Now this is familiar,” she taunted.

His foot shot forward, hooking her ankle, and almost sweeping her off her feet.  She ducked and rolled to the side, narrowly missing the blade that he brought down. She stepped back and crouched, and when he swung, she leapt back again.

She was leading him toward it slowly, hoping it would be too late when he realized what she had planned.  Ducking yet another of his swings, and allowing him to press her back another few steps, she finally reached her goal.  She was within arms’ reach of the weapons rack.

Before he could realize what she intended, she swung swiftly downward, and as he moved to block, she reached back and ripped a second sword from the rack, swinging it at his other side.

She was flung forcefully back, as if an invisible hand had picked her up and thrown her.  She hit the wall, hard, and slid down it, collapsing at the base.  Stars and dark spots danced before her eyes.

“Rey?”

She heard the thump of a sword falling to the floor, and then his quick, muffled footsteps.

She couldn’t focus her eyes, but something heavy hit the floor next to her.  When she tried to look at it, it seemed like nothing more than a black and silver blob.

“Rey?” his voice was different, more human somehow—gentle sounding.

One of his large hands slid beneath her head, cradling it as he lifted her.  Slowly, his face came into focus… his real face—large, dark eyes, the slightly fuller lower lip.  She swallowed around a lump in her throat.  Something akin to relief flowed through her. She hadn’t realized how much she’d wanted to actually see his face again until that very moment.

He carefully brushed the strands of hair that had escaped her buns away from her face, his fingers lingering against her cheek for slightly longer than necessary.

“Are you injured?” he asked, his voice low.

“You… you threw me into a wall,” she mumbled.

“You were going to hack my arm off,” he reminded her.

“You used the Force against me.  You know I can’t—“

“It was a well-thought out move you made.  I didn’t expect it,” he cut her off.

She closed her mouth against replying, and stared back at him, still somewhat dazed.  Once again, his face was too close to hers, dangerously close.

“What is it?  What are you thinking?” he demanded, and his fingers returned to smooth back the loose strands of hair, tucking them gently behind her ear.  It made her think of the time he had held the water bottle to her lips above the Resurrection Field, and when he had carried her for days, and the night when she had been shivering from cold and his hands had wrapped around her and-

“That I hate your mask.  I-I hate it.” She stuttered.  “You don’t need it.  You just wear it so that no one will see… will see…”

“Don’t mistake me for someone I am not, Rey,” he warned.  He withdrew his hand, but she reached out and caught his wrist, causing his eyes to widen in surprise.

“You weren’t supposed to touch me,” she whispered.

He glanced away, but she reached up and caught her fingers in his hair, giving his head a firm tug.

“You weren’t supposed to-“

He stopped her words with his lips and she gasped against them before kissing him back, tightening her hold on him, trying to bring him closer still.  The hand holding her head, slid down to grasp her neck, while his free hand slid over her shoulder, and across the heavy fabric covering her chest.  He slid his arm beneath her, hauling her to her knees, and then squeezing her against himself.

He buried his face against her neck, kissing and biting the tender flesh at the base of it, while his hands moved to the cord that cinched her robe around the waist.  Breathing raggedly, with her lips pressed to his forehead, she helped him to unknot the tie, and threw her arms up, allowing him to tug the robe hastily off over her head.  She shivered in her thin shift at the feel of his gloved hand moving up her leg as he kissed beneath her chin.

She fell back, pulling him with her, feeling the weight of his body on top of hers.  He leaned back, straddling her, so that he could look down on her while he removed his gloves and tossed them to the side.  When his hands returned to her body, she gasped at the warmth of his skin, closing her eyes as his fingers skimmed along her inner thigh, pushing the fabric of her shift up.

He was watching her still, perhaps waiting for her to—

The door to the training room opened, and twisting her head quickly to the side, Rey could see at least a half a dozen pairs of boots entering.

“Well, well… what do we have here?” hissed an unfamiliar voice.


	14. The Sphere

Rey flinched.  It was the only movement she could make.  Had he not been straddling her, she would have rolled immediately to her side and snatched up her fallen sword, but his reaction suggested that these visitors were no threat.

He glanced toward the speaker with an air of languid indifference, before standing slowly and straightening his robes.  Rey sat up the moment she was freed, and scrambled to her feet beside him.  She was suddenly and acutely aware of the absence of her own robes.  It was a good thing she had chosen to leave her shift on beneath them.

In the doorway stood three masked figures and a black-robed acolyte.  She recognized the three from the raid on Ka’vec.  These were members of Kylo’s Knights of Ren, and the way they stood, lax and at ease, suggested that they were on very familiar terms with him.  The acolyte was the only one who stood with his head bowed beneath his hood.

“I am training my apprentice,” Kylo began, his voice measured and low.  “I do hope that this interruption is not without reason.”

“Training?” the first repeated.  It was a woman beneath the mask, Rey was certain.  The timbre of her modified voice suggested it, and her body, even in its black armor, was noticeably slighter than her comrades.  “I don’t recognize the forms you’re teaching.  Is that the sort of _training_ you learned on Ka’vec?”

The largest of the Knights snorted at this, and Kylo’s eyes went immediately to him.  He was not amused. Rey could feel his anger building.

“When you’ve finished your _training_ , perhaps you’ll let me have a go with her, eh?” the tall one scoffed.

Rey’s eyes were on Kylo.  She saw his head tilt to one side as the tall Knight fell to his knees and grabbed at his neck.  He was making choking sounds which sounded metallic through his mask.

“Is that the girl you dragged out of the mud back on Ka’vec?” the woman inquired, ignoring her choking companion as she paced toward them.  “You’ll have to forgive me for saying it, but she doesn’t look like much.”

“Will I?”Kylo snarled, turning his attention to her.  The choking Knight collapsed, finally breathing in great, shuddering gasps.

“You’ve waited so long to take on an apprentice.  I suppose I had assumed that when you finally did, your apprentice would be… well, something more, perhaps.”

Rey’s hands itched for the cast-off sword.  She didn’t like the way the woman was sizing her up, almost as if she was looking for a fight.  The woman was armed to the teeth, and moved with the grace and confidence of a skilled fighter.  Rey wasn’t sure she like her odds.

“And I suppose you believe your own apprentice to be far superior?” Kylo growled, and for the first time the woman glanced over her shoulder toward the black-robed figure standing with his head bowed near the doorway.

“Oh, I had almost forgotten.  I came to present my new apprentice to the Master of the Knights of Ren.  Kylo Ren, may I introduce Yure Vlock.  Yure, bow to Master Ren.”

The figure kneeled in response, dipping his head even lower.

“Yure has mastered six of the seven forms of lightsaber combat, and he’s currently training in Massassai weaponry.  He is a worthy apprentice, and I believe we can expect great things from him.  We will soon test him in combat,” the woman finished, as she slowly circled Rey.

“Fine,” Kylo nodded.

“And your apprentice?” the woman asked.

“My apprentice isn’t your concern, Jaila.”

“What are her talents?  Hand-to-hand combat, I take it?  What else—is she force sensitive?” Jaila asked, ignoring the warning note in his voice.  Rey continued to stand very still as the female knight appraised her.

“Her talents are considerable.  I suggest you find somewhere else to train before I allow her to demonstrate.”

“But I would like a demonstration,” the woman urged him.  “Yure, come here!”

At her order, the hooded figure stood and approached swiftly, bowing once again as he reached them.  Jaila reached for his hood and swept it back revealing the sharp-featured, red-skinned face of her apprentice.  His yellow eyes swept quickly across Rey before returning to the floor, and she thought she detected a hint of a smirk cross his face.

“What do you say we match them against each other and see how she does, Master Ren?  Surely, any apprentice of yours has nothing to fear from mine,” Jaila challenged.

Rey glanced quickly at Kylo, hoping that neither her shock nor fear showed on her face, but he did not deign to notice her.  He seemed to be considering it.  Rey wished she could kick him!  Without her Force abilities, Jaila’s apprentice was likely to beat her senseless. When Kylo nodded, she couldn’t stop the angry huff of breath that escaped her.

“Very well, but my apprentice has only recently recovered from her latest injuries.  She’ll need rest, and time to familiarize herself with a new weapon.  Shall we say three days hence?” he agreed.

Jailia’s helmet jerked in a quick nod.

“Fair enough, Master Ren.  I look forward to it.”

“We’ll leave you to your training then.  Your apprentice will need it much more than mine,” he sneered. 

He extended his arm toward his helmet, and caught it as it flew to his hand.  He passed Yure without sparing him a glance, and after a moments hesitation, Rey hurried after him, keeping her head up and her lips clamped firmly as they took their leave.

It was harder to keep her mouth shut while following him through the Citadel.  She wanted to stop him, accuse him of using her for sport, and demand an explanation, but she suspected that any attempt she made would be quickly shut down with one wave of his hand.  There was no telling who might be listening, and she knew him well enough to know that he would not tolerate any expression of doubt from his apprentice which wasn’t made behind closed doors.

She was breathing heavily by the time he stopped and finally turned towards her.

“You will begin a new type of training now,” he said, and motioned to the door before them.

It was a heavy, and oddly-shaped metal door which tapered up to a point at the top, and appeared to be bolted shut from the outside.  Something about it was foreboding to her.

“What is this?” she demanded.

“Go in and see,” he ordered.

Glancing again at the heavily bolted door, Rey could not help the look of suspicion that crossed her face.

“After you, Master Ren.”

Kylo smirked, but threw the bolts and stepped through the darkened doorway.  After a brief second of hesitation, she followed, cringing away from the walls as she walked through the darkened, narrow hallway.

There was something wrong with the room beyond the door, something that raised the hairs along the back of her neck, and across her arms.  Standing in the dark, she tried too place it— and recognized, at last, the tingling sensation that raced through her veins.

She drew in a sharp breath feeling the Force in her hands as she hadn’t since coming to Baudere… but that wasn’t exactly true.  She had felt it, had sensed flashes of it when she was angry with the monster who held her captive, and then she understood what was wrong.

The Force was dark.

A light flared in front of her, sparking bright blue and then white before glowing brightly, revealing the space around her.

Rey gasped.

The room was spherical, with only one, massive chair in the very center of the floor.  The chair reclined backwards slightly so that anyone sitting in it would be staring at the center of the ceiling, from which hung sheets of quivering gray and pink matter.  She mistook it for material at first, but upon closer inspection, the pinkish grey sheets seemed to pulsate slightly. Glancing quickly around, she realized that the walls were made of the same stuff, and that the entire room seemed to pulse and quiver like a human’s spilled innards.  The room was alive!

She covered her mouth, and stepped back, crashing immediately into Kylo Ren, who had moved behind her without her realizing.  He stood between her and the door, and she could not get by him without touching one of the walls—something that she had no intention of doing.

“Wh-what is this place?” she stammered, repressing the urge to push past him and run from the room.

“A remnant from the days when this citadel was a Sith stronghold.  This is called a meditation sphere—a space which almost has its own consciousness.  It multiplies a Force-users abilities many times over if used correctly,” he explained.

“Why is it _moving_?” she demanded, lowering her voice, ‘walls shouldn’t move.”

“Technology borrowed from the Yuuzhan Vong—the greatest bio-architects this galaxy has ever known—though they themselves came from far beyond it. From now on, we’re going to work on strengthening your Force abilities.  You won’t beat Jaila’s apprentice with your meager combat experience.  However, I’ve seen your Force abilities and they are… formidable.  There is not an acolyte or apprentice on Baudere who could match you.”

His words rekindled her anger, and she almost forgot her trepidation of the pulsating room as she regarded him through narrowed eyes.

“You had no right to say that I would fight him!” she accused.

“As your master, I have every right,” he replied coolly.

“No!  Not in this.  You’re training me as your apprentice, he is training as well, we are not enemies.  There is much that I have compromised to save my own life, but not this.  I do not fight for honor.  Not for my own, and certainly not for yours.”

She flinched, waiting for his anger to come, but it did not.  Kylo remained cool and detached, reaching past her to set his helmet on the arm of the chair, and removing the cowl from around his neck.  This he began to twist slowly between his hands, Rey swallowed… hard.

“Is that what you think I did, offered you up to serve my own honor?” he asked lightly.

When she didn’t answer, he smiled bitterly to himself and nodded.

“What you don’t realize, scavenger, is that Yure and his fellow acolytes have served at this Citadel for years, training, competing against one another for the slim chance that one day they might be chosen to ascend to the rank of apprentice.  Yure has proven himself in skill and wit, time and again.  He did not gain his position easily.  It is likely that he killed many of his peers to gain his place. You, however, are an unknown.  You came here upon no one’s recommendation but my own.  Your skill has been displayed to no one but me.  You must understand that the position you inhabit is one of great envy—“

“I didn’t chose it!” she spat.

“That may be true, but no one but you and I know the way of it.  Yure is well known to be an exceptional fighter, a warrior of great strength and cunning.  He has little to fear from any of my knights nor from the jealousy of the acolytes.  There are few who would challenge his place.  You however… you have yet to prove yourself to my Knights.  They do not yet think you worthy to fight among them—and that can have dangerous consequences for you—“

“You mean… you mean that one of them might attempt to assassinate me,” she murmured.

“But if you were to win against Yure…”

Rey thought it over briefly.

“I’ve been here… well, I don’t know how long, and no one has ever tried to kill me,” she muttered.

“It was assumed that you were my prisoner.  I had not claimed you as my apprentice.”

“It is against the Jedi code.  We don’t fight unless we have to… we don’t—“

“You are not now, nor were you ever fully a Jedi, little scavenger.”

“I… I don’t… I don’t know—“

“This you will do, girl.  You will do it because I order it so, and I am your master.”

She scowled, and twisted her hands nervously together as she backed away from him.  It was true that she had agreed to follow his orders—one of the many compromises she had made in order to stay alive.  She could not deny that, nor did it seem that she would be able to deny him in this.

He watched her reaction, his eyebrows drawing down, as he stopped twisting the cloth between his hands.

“I will give you something,” he murmured after a moment of silence between them.  “Succeed in this and you will win a concession from me.”

“What?  What will you give me?” she asked, pricking up almost immediately.

“What do you wish?”

“My freedom!” she said at once, and saw her mistake almost immediately.

He sneered and turned away, almost as though she had spat at him, and for a moment, she feared that he would leave her there, bolting her in, and in a panic, she sprang after him, grasping the back of his robes.  He froze at her touch.

“The sun,” she whispered.  “I want to see the sun, any sun.  All this darkness and cold all the time.  I’m not… I can’t stand it.”

He turned slowly to face her, and she let go of his robes, and backed away, ashamed of her fear and the desperation in her voice.

He took a step forward and then another, forcing her to back away farther, until she was stopped by the brush of the chair against the backs of her knees.

“Then you will train in the Force again,” he said, and with one swift movement, he wrapped the twisted cowl around her face, tying it tightly behind her head so that her eyes were bound.

Rey fought blindly to free herself, only for her wrists to be caught and held.

“Peace, scavenger, peace,” he growled.  “All beginners must first learn not to see with their eyes.  Surely Skywalker taught you in the same way.”

He was right, of course.  Master Luke had tied a scarf around her eyes and forced her to deflect small rocks he tossed at her for hours.  She remembered the bruises, and how she loathed being blind, but it was different with Master Luke.  Being blinded before him had never made her feel vulnerable, or exposed.  Blind before Kylo Ren, she shivered, and for the briefest of seconds imagined his hand stoking her thigh the way he had in the training room.

“You must be able to sense an attack before it happens.  You must use the Force to predict what your opponent will do before they do it, and finally, you must learn to do what Skywalker did not teach and use the Force as a weapon,” he instructed.

His voice was moving, coming from her side at one moment and from behind her at the next.  He was circling her slowly.  When his voice stopped, she tilted her head nervously, listening for any telltale rustle or breath. Would he attack, or would he toss objects at her as Master Luke had?  Perhaps that was part of his training.  He wanted her to determine his intentions for herself.

Rey took a deep breath and tentatively reached out with her mind.  He was easy to sense.  His Force signature was so strong, that even on the dead planet, Baudere, she could almost always feel him.

The steady beat of his presence throbbed in her ears almost immediately, and she turned toward the source of it and was rewarded with a low chuckle.

Still he did not move, and once again, she tried to move the flow of power she felt in her veins outside of her body to push against him, to sense his thoughts—a skill she had never tried before.

But that wasn’t quite true.  She had done it once before, driving her will into his thoughts to pull out whatever might hurt him.  She had been under attack then, however, and her duress had certainly added to her abilities—darkening them as she now understood.  This was not a Jedi skill.

Her senses sharpened to her immediate left, and at once she could feel the shift in the air, and visualize his hand in the darkness.  He was reaching slowly toward her.

She turned and shot her arm out, neatly catching his wrist.

“Good, but had I been trying to attack you, your reaction would have come too late.  Attack wasn’t my intent, Rey.  What did I intend to do?”

“I don’t know,” she growled.

A force hit her from the opposite side, knocking her back so that her knees bent against the chair and she fell back into it.  She made immediately to get up, but was stopped by a pressure against her chest.

“My intent was to off-balance you.  To focus your attention to one side, so that you would not see my true attack—an old trick.  One you would have easily seen through had you attempted to ascertain my intent and not my position.”

“Alright, I see your point.  Let me up,” she hissed.

“No. Try again.  My intent, Rey.  What is it?”

Before she could sense his movement, she felt his fingers sweep lightly across her cheek and down her neck.  She drew in a quick breath, and repressed her own thoughts, flashes of the moments before they were interrupted in the training room… his hand moving slowly up her thigh.

His intent—focus! Gritting her teeth she drove every bit of the tingling, burning sensation in her veins towards him.  She would dig into his head the way he once had hers.

_Immediately, she felt fear.  It was all her fault.  She wanted too much too fast.  Now the girl was grievously injured and not healing.  Her skin was cold to the touch and she shivered beneath the heavy blanket.  When the medic came and went, he was always muttering, pretending that he didn’t notice her standing there.  As soon as he left, she once again lifted the blanket and slipped into bed beside her, pulling the girl’s small, cold body into her arms, breathing hot against her neck.  She was all bones, small and breakable, and yet the girl relaxed against the heat of her body as though comforted, yet her own fear intensified.  She would soon have no choice but to leave the girl and get the Bacta herself._

A sharp stinging pain across her cheek brought her out of the memory.

“You slapped me!” she accused.

“Focus, Rey.  What is my intent?” he demanded.

“I can’t… I don’t know how to find it.  There’s… there’s too many other thoughts in a person’s head!”

“Because you look too deep.  Intent in battle is a shallow thing.  Again.”

This time, she felt pressure in her own head, and realized that he was forcing his way into her thoughts.  Struggling with the power that flowed through her, she once again directed it at him, forcing him back, away from the embarrassing feelings she harbored.

He slapped her again.

Rey screeched in frustration.

“You will battle those who will use the Force as a weapon, wielding it at as fast as they swing a light saber.  You must learn to shield your mind as well as your body,” he snapped.  “Your very thoughts will be used against you.”

“I’m trying!”

“Again.”

His hand moved across her knee, and slowly up her leg, his trailing fingers lightly, massaging her inner thigh.  He was… he had seen her thoughts!

Intent, she reminded herself, and immediately directed the Force at him—not trying to dig into his mind, but allowing the power to brush lightly over him.  She sensed emotions first.  His anger was always there, though not the strong beat that she normally felt.  His frustration was much stronger.  Was he frustrated with her?

By focusing on his feeling, she found that his thoughts relating to the feeling unfurled easily around it.  He was frustrated by her.  He was frustrated by a need involving her.  He intended to—

Her focus was suddenly shattered by the sensation of warmth and wetness against her inner thigh.  His mouth… he was kissing her there, and then the tip of his tongue was tracing a line up and up, as his hands slid under her shift, and over the thin underwear she wore.  His fingers hooked around the edge of the material at her hips and tugged gently downward.

With a gasp, Rey stiffened and grabbed the arms of the chair.  He froze, his lips still pressed against her thigh, and then he slowly lifted his head.  An instant later, she heard the rustle of his robes, and the creak of the chair as he leaned over her, his fingers still wrapped around her undergarments.

“My intent, Rey?” he whispered.  “What is it?”

“I… I think I know it,” she stammered.

His lips pressed against hers and without thinking, she opened her mouth to his, and he moaned as her tongue moved against his.  His hand tightened around the fabric gathered at her hips, pulling the material taught against the throbbing between her legs, before hastily yanking it down, his mouth moving down her neck as he pulled, and she felt the rush of air against her most sensitive parts.

His hand moved between her legs, his fingertips trailing lightly across her sex, and she shivered violently at the sudden contact, and at the realization that he his mouth was moving closer and closer, kissing her stomach, and then his breath, hot against that tight throbbing before she felt the tip of his tongue—

“OH!” she cried out, digging her nails into arms of the chair, knocking his helmet to the ground.

Her legs were shaking now, and his hands slowly massaged her thighs as though he was trying to calm her, but his tongue… his tongue…

Rey bit her lip, trying to stifle the uneven gasps of breath she took.  This was… this was wrong.  This was all wrong.  Kylo Ren was a… he was a… monster… an enemy, and she wanted this, wanted his hands on her, wanted him to… no. NO!

She was blindfolded.  Better to pretend that it was someone else.  Better to think of anyone else.  Someone she loved and trusted.  Finn!  No, not Finn.  Her mind raced to find anyone, anyone but her nemesis, the murderer who knelt between her legs.

Poe Dameron!  The pilot who had once flirted with her and bought her a drink after the destruction of Starkiller Base.  It was Poe Dameron whose finger was teasingly circling her wet entrance.  His mouth which sucked at the sensitive nub above it.  Poe Dameron who stopped abruptly, causing her to whimper with loss.

“Poe… Dameron?” Kylo Ren hissed.  “Poe Dameron, scavenger?”

Rey ripped the blindfold off as he stood up, noticeably adjusting his robes.  Disgust showed plainly on his face, but she felt it as well… disgust with her.

He snatched his helmet up, and turned his back to her.

He was leaving!  He was leaving her there!

“The door locks from the outside,” he growled.  “You’ll stay in here until you can use the Force to open it.  Train hard, scavenger, the bolt is heavy.”

“Kylo, No!” she screeched, jumping to her feet.

She was too late. The door closed behind him, and she heard the bolt fall into place as she reached it.

“KYLO!” she screamed, beating the heavy door with her fists, but he was gone.

She was alone in the strange, pulsing room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More to come ;)


	15. The Reaper

At the end of the empty hallway, the bolt rattled wildly against its clasps. The metal door gave a portentous groan as first one, then two rivets flew from it, striking the opposite wall before skittering across the floor. A sharp crack preceded the dent which appeared as if it from nowhere across the face of it, and then, with a final loud clang and the scream of hinges being bent the wrong way, the door exploded from its frame.

Rey paused a moment in the empty doorway, leaning against the frame as she caught her breath.  The amount of power that throbbed through her veins was overwhelming.  The pulse of the room behind her matched the beat of her heart, pounding double quick in her chest.  As she began to walk away, the thumping pulse grew stronger.

She didn’t know how long she had spent crouched on the floor of that room, afraid to touch the oddly lifelike walls, humming to herself to drone out that pulsing beat, covering her ears when the whispers started.  The anger and hatred and hunger for revenge had started outside of her head—or at least she thought so—disembodied feelings that forced themselves on her as she did her best to resist. 

She had repeated the Jedi creed until her voice had grown hoarse, but it hadn’t kept her thoughts from returning time and again to Kylo Ren, and to everything he had done to her.  She hated him for capturing her, for taking her from Master Luke, for forcing her to walk through that terrible, dark wasteland, for murdering Han Solo in front of her, and for dreaming about it, thereby forcing her to watch it again.  He had tricked her into compromising herself.  She hated him for the false tenderness he sometimes displayed in order to twist her into doing what he wanted, and most of all, she hated him for the disease he had spawned in her—a mental sickness it surely was, which made her want to see his face and feel his touch.

She could no longer separate her thoughts into reasons, they had lumped together so that there was only one thought in her head, one idea, repeating over and over with every beat of the new, strange power inside her:  I will kill Kylo Ren, I will kill Kylo Ren, I will kill Kylo Ren.

Her feet moved without instruction.  She could feel him, was being pulled toward where he was, and did not resist.  They would fight, and she was certain that he would fall.  She did not doubt the final outcome.  Had the Chaata herself not assured her that she would die a long ways off?

Her footsteps slowed at the sound of metal striking metal.  She was nearing the training room, and upon reaching the entrance, she stopped.  The sound of combat echoed from inside.  He was not there, she knew it, but it occurred to her that she would need a weapon.  The training room contained a weapons rack.

 

 

Jaila’s apprentice swung the curved metal bar.  It flew through the air, slicing through the torso of the suit of armor at the other end of the room and then swerved, returning to him.  He caught it with a grunt, and froze as a determined-looking Rey strode past him without a glance.

He spoke not a word until she reached the racks, selected a double-bladed staff, and turned to face him.

“I see,” he muttered, “So you have decided to face me without your master.  That is brave of you, little one… brave, but not wise.”

As she paced toward him, Yure crouched into a fighting stance, waiting.  It took him a moment to realize that she did not return his gaze.  The girl’s eyes were wild—unfocused even— as though she did not see him at all.  He would not be tricked.

As she neared, he reached out with the Force- tentatively.  It was a skill he had yet to master.  He immediately encountered a powerful block and winced—the feeling was similar to touching a live wire.

With only a few feet left between them, he tightened his grip on the handle of his weapon and waited.  Two feet… one foot…

The girl strode past him, again without looking in his direction.  She was going to leave… she was going to walk through the door…

 

 

The desire to kill Kylo Ren grew stronger.  The memory of him standing over her with a look of disgust upon his face was all that she could see.  She was aware of the other apprentice in the room—could sense his resolve and his desire to prove himself, but it mattered not.  He was nothing but an annoyance.  When he called out to her to stop, her steps didn’t slow for an instant.

A second later, she sensed danger that sliced through the air, aiming for her back.  Rey threw herself to the floor, just as the curved weapon whizzed over her.   As it swerved into its return, Rey rolled to her knees and heaved her staff at it.  Her blade struck the end, which immediately changed the path of the curved bar.  The ancient Massassi weapon hit the wall and stuck.

Rey shot to her feet and spun to face her attacker.  Weaponless, they stared at each other before the dark apprentice gave a growl of rage and charged toward her.

Rey laughed and held her arms out to him.  Had she actually been afraid of this thick-headed slug?  How ridiculous!  He was all bluster and muscle.  He could swing a heavy weapon, heavy enough to crush her skull… but she could crush his without lifting a single finger.  It was no match at all.

The apprentice stumbled before he reached her, and fell to his knees.  He glanced up at Rey, a look of confusion on his sharply-angled face, followed by an expression of fear as he gripped the sides of his head and bent over in pain.  When he lifted his head again, black blood dripped from his nose.

It wasn’t enough!

Kylo had warned her that the other acolytes would try to kill her.  The Knights didn’t believe her fit to fight beside them.  They thought her weak and unworthy.  She would show them.  She would show all of them!  Jaila’s apprentice would serve as an example.

Rey clenched her fist and felt the overwhelming power of the Force surge from her and wrap itself around the dark apprentice.

 _Pain_ , she thought, _Pain… break him… more blood…an example of what will happen to all of them…_

The beat inside of her grew stronger and faster.  She could feel his life force now—Jaila’s ridiculous apprentice—he was already growing weak under the pressure she commanded.

His arm twisted backward, giving a deeply satisfying snap, and the blood from his nose ran heavier.  He opened his mouth, and she saw that his teeth were also blackened by blood.  Why didn’t he scream?  He should scream and beg her for mercy!

Angered, she clenched her fist tighter, and the apprentice fell forward, twitching.

“Stop!” hissed a metallic voice.

Rey recognized it.

Jaila had come.  Perhaps she felt her apprentice’s pain, or maybe she sensed that he was dying.

Rey did not stop.  She would squeeze until she was sure that that he was dead.  With an inhuman shriek of rage, Jaila charged.

Rey turned to face the doorway, and the figure of the Knight which raced toward her, wielding a light saber.  This threat was also no match for her, and it surprised her that one of Kylo’s knights had no better sense than to know as much.

With the flick of her wrist, the light saber flew from Jaila’s hand, extinguishing itself as it hit the floor and rolled.  Rey laughed again.  The power of the Force was almost too strong.  It grew inside of her the way insta-bread did, only there seemed to be no end of it.  The beating in her ears was so fast and so loud that she could no longer sense Kylo Ren through it.  Small matter!  It was easy to kill these dark ones.  Perhaps she would kill them all, one-by-one as they came for her.  Kylo would be among them sooner or later.

Jaila snarled and crouched to pull a dagger from her boot as she ran.  She was upon Rey now.  She raised her arm high to strike, and then… froze.

She could not move.  Her arm shook as she strained to break from Rey’s invisible hold, and at last, Rey felt a Force power strong enough to push against her own contending with her.  She smiled as she walked slowly around the enraged Knight—the woman was weakening, she could feel her growing weaker as she herself grew stronger.  Her head was pounding now and she could barely feel her own body—the Force inside of her was strong that it seemed as though her very body was made of it, and she knew that when Jaila’s defense gave out, she would be crushed in an instant.

“Force-reaper!” Jaila hissed.

“Stop,”

Rey whirled to face Kylo Ren himself.  He stood in the doorway, his hands clasped lightly behind his back, his face exposed but impassive.  He stared back at Rey as though he were only mildly interested in the spectacle before him.

She moved to take a step toward him, forgetting Jaila in her desire to kill him, and was immediately stopped by a sharp, stabbing pain in her shoulder.  Jaila had brought the knife down, driving it in just above her shoulder blade.

Rey gasped and stumbled.  Her anger caused the Force to surge within her again, and her vision faded to a blurry wash of subdued colors.  She fell to her knees, and realized that she could feel her own body again, and that the muscles in her legs and arms were spasming and she could not control them, and then the pain seemed to come from everywhere.  The power was leaving her.  She fell forward, still shaking as she heard the sound of his boots padding across the floor toward her.

“I said stop, Jaila,” he growled, and Rey realized that the Knight had withdrawn the dagger from her shoulder and had pinned her to the ground with her knee, gripping her face with one hand and pressing the point of the blade against her throat with the other.

“She killed Yure!” Jaila snarled.

“You wanted a match between them.  Will you punish my apprentice because she bested yours?” he asked.

“You tricked me!  She’s a Force Reaper.  You never said she—“

“You assumed she was weak.  You insisted they spar. I conceded to your demand, and she won.  Now take your hands off my apprentice.”

His footsteps stopped, and Rey knew with sickening certainty that he now stood over her.

Jaila removed the blade from Rey’s throat, but did not move fast enough for Kylo Ren’s liking, for Rey immediately felt the loss of her weight as she was flung forcefully to the side.  It was Kylo’s hands she felt next as the slid under her back and legs. He hefted her up from the floor and readjusted her gently in his arms before he began to walk.

Cradled against the chest of her most despised enemy, she thought she heard Jaila whisper something else, but couldn’t make it out over the strong beat of the Force which came from him.

He walked quickly as Rey struggled to stay conscious.  Soon she heard the hiss of a door opening and felt softness beneath her as he laid her gently on the bed, and walked away.

She wasn’t certain how long she laid there.  It was likely she passed out for a short time, for suddenly, her thoughts were sharpened by a fresh wave of pain from her shoulder.  The haze cleared from her eyes, though the world seemed dimmer than she remembered.

She lay on his bed and he was there, leaning over her, sponging at her shoulder with a damp cloth.  Her wound hurt, but not as much as she suspected it should.  Even stranger was the realization that she had desperately wanted to kill him only moments before, and now, being so close to him, caused no reaction in her.  She had no emotions—even her hatred of him seemed to have dissipated.  She felt nothing.

“That won’t last,” he murmured, as though she had asked him a question. “You were overwhelmed.  Your body isn’t trained to handle that level of power, and began shutting down.  You were drained, but you will recover.  After you rest, you’ll begin to feel like yourself again.”

She glanced away from him. She did feel tired, and though she couldn’t muster the energy to hate him, she would have rather been alone.  He should have brought her to the medbay.  Brick was surely better equipped to deal with her wounds.

“Your friend is no longer with us,” he answered her.  “MT-5927 was discovered while returning from an unauthorized trip to the Resurrection Field last night.  It seems that he was illegally gathering resources and participating in black market activity for personal gain.  He was assigned to reeducation and was picked up during the last sleeping cycle-- while you were still… training.”

Rey knew that this would normally cause her anger and fear—sadness even, and for Brick’s sake, she desperately wanted to feel those emotions, but try as she might, there was only emptiness inside her.  Master Luke had once told her that the Force—dark or light—always took a toll on its wielder.  That power always came with a cost.  She hadn’t known it would be so high.  Stealing a quick glance at the lean face which hovered over hers, she wondered how much he had paid.

If he heard her thought, his face did not betray it.  He dipped the cloth again and rung it out, reaching for her hand.  Slowly, he cleaned the dried streaks where the blood had run down her arm and dripped from her fingers.  Although she felt nothing, she guessed that she would later regret her passive acceptance of him, and mustered the energy to open her mouth.

“Is that why you are the way you?” she rasped.

“How am I?” he mumbled.

“Empty.  An obedient shell that does your master’s will.  A calculating, cruel monster without any real feeling,” she replied.  “It’s because of the Force, isn’t it?  The dark force… you’ve wielded it for so long, that there’s nothing left of the real you.  That’s why you say Ben Solo is dead, right?”

He did not give her an answer, but his lips tightened at her words, and when he scrubbed at her fingers, she winced at his forcefulness.

“Jaila’s apprentice is dead, isn’t he?” she whispered.

When he nodded, Rey at last felt something—the faintest stirrings of regret.  She suspected that when her feelings did return, this one, regret, would become almost unbearable.

“Jaila called me a force reaper…” her voice trailed off uncertainly.

“Yes,” he agreed.  “Skywalker never told you, did he?”

“I don’t think he knew-“

“He knew.  He knew from the moment he met you.  It took me longer.  The Force had barely awakened in you on Starkiller, and then, when we met in the woods… when I was trying to disarm you… at first I thought you’d somehow discovered battle meditation, but I kept growing weaker and weaker while you grew stronger.”

“I steal the Force from others?”

“It isn’t as simple as that, Rey.  When you become angry or afraid you draw that sort of energy from those around you.  You thrive, becoming more and more powerful.  There have been Force reapers before, the archives mention such things, but beings like that were always extremely rare.”

“I thrive only on the Dark Force?” she whispered.

“Yes.  Do you understand now?  You were not meant for the light, Rey.  Skywalker knew it. You struggled with your training under him.  I saw it in your memories.  He didn’t want you to know, he was afraid that you’d turn to me if you understood.  He worked hard to block you from drawing on dark energy when you were frustrated or angry, and tried to train you to use the Force as a Jedi, the way he was trained.”

“And that’s why you locked me in that room.  That’s why you trapped me there, left me feeling angry and afraid and… and… humiliated… because you knew.  You knew what would happen when I got out,” she accused.

“The meditation sphere is like a reservoir, filled with Dark Force.  I knew you would draw it in, becoming more powerful if you were angry and afraid, yes,” he admitted.

“And you knew that I would kill Yure.”

“No.  I couldn’t have known exactly what you’d do.”

“But you knew when I freed myself.  You must have.  You must have felt my anger, you must have felt so large a disturbance in the Force.”

“Yes.”

“And you didn’t come.  You didn’t stop me.”

“I had an audience with the Supreme Leader.”

“You let it happen.  You knew if I was in control of myself, I’d never do that, and you let it happen.”

Rey closed her eyes, not wanting to see his face anymore.  She heard the cloth drop into the bowl as he laid her hand gently across her stomach. A moment later, his gloved fingers spread hers apart, intertwining with her own as he squeezed her hand.

“It gets easier,” he whispered.

“I don’t want it to.”

She opened her eyes to glance down at their hands, clasped together.

“The happiest moment of my life,” she murmured, “the happiest moment I can remember, was on Starkiller base.  I was trying to escape, and I opened a door and I saw… and I saw Finn and Han.  They came for me, and I knew that Finn didn’t care about the resistance.  He risked his life to come and get me.  I spent my entire life alone.  No one had ever came back for me before… no one.  I knew then that I wasn’t alone anymore, and I thought… I thought I never would be again.”

“The traitor could never understand you.  He doesn’t know what it’s like… to have such power… to fear yourself… to be so alone…“

“But you do,” she interrupted.  “Is that what you’re getting at?”

“Yes,” he agreed, gripping her hand tighter.

They stared at one another for a long moment, but as he reached out to lightly stroke her cheek, Rey abruptly turned her face away.

“You do understand,” she agreed.  “You saw how alone I was from the very first time we met, and you’ve used it against me-- used it to manipulate me into doing what you want.  I was so afraid of being alone again that I made myself believe that your compassion was real, that your touch was something I wanted.  I knew that you were a monster, I saw you kill your own father, and yet like a fat-headed lump, I still hoped… well, I don’t hope anymore.  I don’t hope.”

She pulled her hand away and tucked it under her arm as she turned on her side, away from him.

“You’re tired,” he murmured.  “You’ll be yourself again soon.”

She felt him stroke her hair and moved further away from him in response.

“I’m going to Korriban,” he said.  “The Supreme Leader has work for me to do there.  I want you to come with me…”

When she didn’t answer, he sighed.

“There’s sunlight on Korriban—not the sort of warmth that you’re used to, but I promised you sunlight—“

“I don’t care.  If you order me to go, I’ll go.  If you tell me to stay, I’ll stay.  I truly don’t care anymore.”

She heard the rustle of his robes as he stood.

“This will pass, Rey.  Sleep now, and when you wake, you’ll be yourself again,” he said, though he didn’t sound entirely certain.  The thought occurred to her that he was speaking more to reassure himself than to comfort her.

Rey closed her eyes again, relaxing only when she heard the door shut behind him.  The last thought she had before falling asleep was of the Chaata.  In her mind, the tiny, wrinkled, old seer leaned over her pot and stirred it with great concentration.  “If Ben Solo offers you the opportunity to accompany him to Korriban,” the Chaata began.

“Ben Solo is dead,” Rey murmured, correcting the old creature.  The Chaata chuckled knowingly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what's coming in the next chapter? All that slow burn... yeah, it's finally going to bubble over. Anticipate it...
> 
> Also, thank you to everyone who is following along chapter by chapter. Thank you for your comments and your kudos and for bookmarking this. I write so much faster knowing that people are waiting for it!!


	16. Memories

_She recognized the emotions filling her as foreign.  These were his feelings, the constant pain of fighting against oneself.  She was being torn apart, though without any feelings of her own, she was able to view his emotions objectively.  He was almost like two people, fiercely at odds with one another._

_Master Luke reached out to lay a hand on her shoulder._

_“Ben, we can’t know the future.  No one deserves to be punished for choices they haven’t made yet,” he soothed._

_“But the Republic is making the same mistakes.  This has happened before, we can’t stay out of the—“_

_“Your grandfather often struggled with this as well.  I know you’re tired of being told that you have much in common.  I know it frightens you, but we must acknowledge this and learn from the mistakes he made.  Did I ever tell you that Jedi Master Yoda saw the great capacity for darkness in him very early on, and watched Anakin carefully, always seeking to keep the balance within him?”_

_“Yes, and we know how well that worked,” she snapped._

_Master Luke smiled sadly._

_“There was one thing Master Yoda did that helped to balance Anakin-- at least for a time.  Come, walk with me.”_

_She fell into step by his side, but glanced apprehensively toward the training field where Master Luke’s other students had gathered to discuss the latest news of the Republic.  There were so few, only a fraction of what they could be and already divided by ideology and politics.  This new generation of Jedi was weak, and unworthy—that, she was certain of._

_“When Anakin was still a young man, fresh from his days as Master Kenobi’s padawan, Jedi Master Yoda noted his reckless streak.  He thought long over what to do, and came up with a solution that was rather unique.  He assigned a padawan to Anakin—and not just any padawan—a rebellious, headstrong little girl.  I believe she was a Togruta from the planet Shili.  Her name was Ahsoka.”_

_“Ahsoka Tano… she was a hero during the Clone Wars,” Rey repeated almost mechanically._

_“Yes, but before that she was a mouthy, stubborn child who worried her master endlessly.  You see, as Jedi we are tasked with an almost impossible goal.  We are required to feel compassion for all life.  For many of us, this is overwhelming and often results in confusion over whether to take sides, or to fight, or to…”Master Luke’s voice trailed off as his attention was caught by a ripe, and low-hanging yashefruit dangling temptingly from the branch they were passing under.  He reached up, plucked it, and handed it to her.  “Sometimes, Ben, we as Jedi become so focused upon the needs of that greater good, that we forget to see those very life forms as unique and precious individuals.  The care and training of a padawan can remind us to feel compassion for the individual.  It can give a Jedi a new perspective and a very personal sense of purpose in the universe.”_

_She scowled at the yashefruit before tucking it in her robe.  Over the years, Master Luke had travelled throughout the known galaxy in an attempt to find Force-sensitive children to train as Jedi.  His results, to her knowledge, were mediocre at best.  Besides herself, he had found only four others, and none of those were young enough to come to the new academy without attachments and bias—even now, her peers were contemplating abandoning the academy, and using their subpar and underdeveloped abilities to serve the corrupt New Republic. Had Master Luke been more selective about training padawans, they would not be in this predicament._

_“You’re thinking of taking on a new apprentice,” she guessed._

_“Not exactly,” Master Luke said, with the hint of a smile on his face._

_They crested the hill that looked down upon the main building of the academy and stopped.  A Correlian transport ship had landed on the academy’s launch pad, and a woman with dark hair stood nearby, holding a little girl tightly by the wrist._

_“I’m thinking of assigning you a padawan,” Master Luke chuckled._

_A riptide of anger coursed through her, drowning her own thoughts in Kylo Ren’s violent reaction.  She felt her body stiffen and her lips clamp firmly together in his last effort to stem the tide of accusations she suddenly and desperately wanted to hurl._

_“Not immediately, you understand.  She’ll have to learn her forms and practice her meditations for a time, but I think… I think that you’re ready, Ben.”_

_She drew a deep, shuddery breath, fearful of what would come next._

_“You think I’m ready?” she hissed.  “Ready for what?  The New Republic is full of incompetent, loud-talking fools who care more for their own ambitions then the fate of their people.  They’ve divided, one against another—mother has to hide or risk being assassinated.  We’re on the brink of war, your padawans have turned on you, and you… you think I’m ready… to waste my time playing nursemaid to some Correllian toddler of no consequence?  You think I’m a danger, don’t you?  Like Father—you think that I’m—“_

_“No,” Master Luke interrupted, grasping her shoulder roughly.  “No.  My students haven’t gone to the Republic yet.  They are lost—full of anger and desires, but they have always been lost, each came to us with some darkness already in their hearts.  They may yet find their way.  This child… is different.  This child in uncorrupt and innocent.  Ben, I trust you so much that I chose you to protect the Force in its purest, untainted form.”_

_She clenched her fists, while the voice in her head screamed that these were lies, all lies—that Master Luke was trying only to get rid of them, because he knew the dark thoughts they harbored._

_“I won’t make you do something you abhor.  If you cannot teach the child, then I will do so myself, but Ben… consider it at the very least.”_

_So saying, Master Luke clapped her once more on the shoulder, and began to descend the hill toward the woman and child.  She waited a moment, attempting to smother her anger and resentment before following behind._

_Upon reaching the bottom of the hill, the woman turned to face them, pulling the child around with her, and Rey’s heart leapt.  The small girl had been scrubbed until her cheeks were red and shiny, and her rough tunic was spotless.  Her hair was carefully brushed back and pinned into three small buns, and when she made eye contact with “Ben”, she dropped her eyes shyly to the ground, her small rosy face growing redder still._

_Rey knew at that moment that she was looking at herself, and her eyes flew to the dark-haired woman who watched Master Luke approach with trepidation on her face._

_“Ahh… so you’ve come,” Master Luke greeted her._

_The woman gave a short nod, and clutched the child tighter to her._

_“You have nothing to fear.  Come, walk with me.  You may leave the child.  My nephew will keep her safe while we talk.”_

_Rey’s mother hesitated a moment, glancing down at her child as though looking for permission, but Master Luke gave off such a peaceful and relaxed aura, that she quickly assented, glancing once in the direction of his nephew before releasing the child’s arm and joining him._

_In that brief moment of eye contact, Rey had undergone unimaginable anguish.  She wanted to call out to her mother, to cry, to follow her, to beg her to acknowledge her child grown into a woman, but this was but a memory that she inhabited by chance, and Kylo Ren had no interest in the woman.   She was dragged along by his intent, and could do nothing to stop the woman.  When her mother passed out of sight with Master Luke, his attention returned to the girl—to her._

_She was shy, he noted, taking a few steps closer.  He had little use for a padawan that had no spirit.  What was he thinking?  He had little use for any padawan!_

_The child had cast her eyes to the ground as her mother walked away, and was taking great pains to look anywhere but at him.  Were all children so quiet?  He couldn’t recall knowing many, not even when he was one._

_“How old are you?” he demanded._

_“I’m five,” she murmured, her voice barely louder than a whisper._

_“Five?” he scoffed.  “You’re small for you age-- a runt, I suppose.”_

_Her head came up, and her eyes narrowed.  With her tiny hands clenched into fists at her side, she finally met his eye._

_“I am not!” she insisted.  “You’re not very nice for your age!”_

_So there was some fire in the child after all.  Rey felt his face twist into the smirk she had come to know so well._

_“What’s your name?” he asked._

_What’s YOUR name?” she replied._

_The girl stared levelly back at him, and Rey felt a strange foreboding that she realized was not her own.  There was something knowing about the child’s large, clear eyes—as though she were looking not at him but into him.  It made Kylo nervous._

_The child’s stomach growled loudly, causing her to glance away in embarrassment._

_“Here,” he hissed, thrusting the yashefruit Master Luke had given them into her hand._

_Although the child took it from him, she held it uncertainly, studying it as though it might be poisoned.  Annoyed by her reaction, he turned his back and strode purposefully away.  Her younger self waited a moment before hurrying to catch up._

_“Where are you going?” the girl asked._

_“To meditate,” he answered, “being a Jedi is very boring, you know.  You spend most of your time sitting very still, and trying not to think about anything.”_

_“The Jedi aren’t boring,” the girl argued.  “The Jedi are heroes.”_

_“I’m a Jedi—or very nearly one anyway, do I seem heroic to you?” he snapped._

_The child pursed her lips, considering._

_“You’re not so bad,” she said at last._

_“Not so bad?” he repeated, stopping to glare down at the child by his side._

_She flushed again, not meeting his eye, but in her embarrassment, she suddenly remembered the yashefruit in her hand and took a large bite of it.  As she swallowed, she stole a sneaky look at him through lowered eyelashes.  Rey felt his lips twitch as if he would smile._

_“BEN!”_

_Another young girl, this one long, dark hair and wearing the same drab robes that clothed both Master Luke and herself, was quickly descending the hill towards them.  Rey felt his body freeze and his fist clench.  He had been expecting this—whatever it was._

_“Ben, it’s happened!  The Nala attacked a Bov Trade Ship.  The Senate is sending troops, and—“_

_“They have no right!” he growled._

_“The Bov senator announced today that he had the support of the Jedi.”_

_“Master Luke would never!”_

_“But Fyomor would—Bov is his home world, and the senator has promised him a position with—“_

_“A Jedi has no need for positions,” he snarled._

_“It isn’t just Fyomor, the others are going as well.  They’ve gone to call a transport now.  Master Luke has already said he won’t stop them.”_

_“Master Luke is a fool!”_

_Rey cringed as his words passed their lips.  Even the dark-haired girl appeared shocked by them.  His anger was gathering like a storm—Rey knew what would follow.  This she had seen before.  She grasped at the furious and half-formed thoughts that whipped around her—The Jedi’s principles were too unfocused… The Jedi were easily corrupted… Master Luke had grown weak…The Senate was corrupt, and its senators were bought and sold like trinkets… The Jedi had outlived their usefulness…  They had been brought to the brink of extinction for a reason… He knew what he had to do… Snoke was right… he had been right from the beginning…_

_He turned to the child beside him.  Her eyes were wide and frightened in her small face, and she shook her head slightly almost as if she knew his thoughts.  Master Luke would learn nothing from his failed students, and would continue his pointless mission to restore the Jedi.  The child was proof of that._

_“Sleep,” he whispered, waving his hand before her face._

_The child’s body slumped lifeless against his arm as the dark-haired girl gasped._

_“Ben, you’re not supposed to—“_

_“I’m through with drawing a line between dark and light.  The line between right and wrong doesn’t follow nearly so narrow a path,” he growled as he laid the child’s sleeping form gently on the ground.  “Bring me to Fyomor.”_

_As the two hurried off, Rey’s consciousness spiraled into a dark, formless void of fear and anger from which there was no escape._

Rey gasped, sitting bolt upright on the bed.

The room was dark and empty, but it still smelled like him.

Her forehead throbbed, and touching it, she realized that she was sweating, and that her heart was thumping wildly in her chest.  She remembered the training room—how she had crushed the life out of Yure, and how Jaila had attacked her.  The wound on her shoulder still burned from Jaila’s dagger.

Yure was dead, she was sure of it, and that knowledge brought with it a crushing feeling of remorse.  Reaching out, she grabbed the edge of the bedside table, steadying herself as she stood, but seeing what had been laid out there, she stopped, withdrawing her hand slowly.

It was a yashefruit.

So he knew.  He knew what she had seen in his head-- perhaps he had shown it to her on purpose.  Perhaps he wanted her to know.

Rey’s hands balled into fists.  Had he also killed her mother, along with Master Luke’s other apprentices?  Why not her?  How had she ended up on Jakku—and where was he now?  Was he hiding from her?

No.

She could feel him somewhere nearby.  He was awake and waiting for her.  Well, she would find him!  She would demand that he tell her everything he knew about herself and her mother.  Rey got to her feet quickly, heading for the door, but was stopped by a thought.

She shook her head slowly.

The last thing she remembered him saying was that when she woke up—she would be herself again.  He was right in that the numbness was gone—seeing the face of her mother had shocked her out of it… and she did feel anger, which was, perhaps, what he intended.  And now he sat somewhere waiting for her… waiting for her to come to him angry and hurt and demanding answers.  Was he once again attempting to raise her emotions so that he might warp her further?

“What game are you playing at now?” she whispered to the empty room.  “How does it suit your purpose to show me such things?”

Whatever his intent, she would not play into his hand.  She would not be manipulated by him again.  Master Luke had often warned her not to let her emotions rule her, and not to form attachments, and it was time she remembered who her true master was.

Taking a deep breath, Rey sank to the floor, folded her legs beneath her, closed her eyes, and emptied her mind to begin meditation as she had been taught.

 

 

“Rey…”

She opened her eyes at the sound of his voice to see Kylo standing over her, holding his helmet.

“I didn’t hear you come in,” she admitted.

“You must have questions,” he said, not quite meeting her eyes.

“No.”

“After… after what happened on Yavin 4, your mother took you to Jakku, I assume to hide you.  I do not know where she went or why she didn’t return.”

“It is of no consequence now.”

“I don’t believe you.  I’ve been in your head, Rey, and I know… ahhh.  You’re afraid, aren’t you?  You’re afraid of becoming angry, afraid of your own power.”

“No.  I mean that it matters very little now.  What’s done is done.”

He sighed and turned away, setting his helmet on the table and dropping into the chair beside it. She watched his movements carefully, noting the way he rubbed his forehead as though it pained him.

“You don’t have to be afraid, Rey.  I’ve been where you are now.  I can help you.  I can teach you how to control it.  That was always my intention.”

“Was it?” she asked.   “That’s why you took me from Master Luke?  So that you could help me?  I don’t believe you.  You always have only one reason— because Snoke told you to.

His eyes flashed with anger and his pale face colored at her words.

“You think Snoke told me to train you? No, scavenger.  After Starkiller, Snoke wanted you dead.  My orders were to hunt down you and Skywalker and kill you both.  It was I who convinced him that you would prove valuable to us—and if I fail him in this, make no mistake, he will destroy you… and perhaps me as well.”

“Should I feel grateful then?” she scoffed.

“Feel however you want. I didn’t make this decision for your benefit.”

“Yet you wanted me to see that you spared me as a child—that you cared for me a little even.  Why?  Why let me see that, if it doesn’t matter to you how I feel?”

Still studying his reactions, she was quick to catch the slight wince her words produced, as well as the long silence that followed.

“It is better if you hate me,” he finally managed, standing abruptly and reaching for his helmet.

“But I don’t hate you,” she said, getting to her feet much slower.  “I’d like to.  I’ve tried to all morning, but I can’t…”

In reality, she had spent the morning combing over every word he’d ever said, and every gesture she remembered, and come to the conclusion that his words and actions were often times at odds.  More than that, it occurred to her that he very much did not want her to hate him, and now, gambling on her suspicions, she laid a trap.

“I can’t,” she repeated, dropping her eyes as though the admission embarrassed her.

He stood very still for a moment, and then crossed the space between them in two steps.  Rey nervously watched his boots, waiting for him to speak.  When he did not, she stole a quick glance at his face.

He was staring at her, and what she saw when she met his eyes pained her a little.  There was something in the dark depths of those eyes she had never thought to see there—a spark of hope.

“You can’t hate me?” he repeated, his voice low.

“No,” she agreed.  He reached out to lightly touch the side of her cheek.  Rey did not move or wince but continued to stare directly into his eyes.  “I can’t hate you.  It’s strange, but I don’t feel anything toward you at all.”

Kylo Ren withdrew his hand so quickly it was as though her skin had burned him.

“What did you feel when you saw your mother in that memory?” he demanded.

“Nothing,” she lied.  “Absolutely nothing other than recognition.”

His eyebrows drew together as he let out a short angry huff.  A moment later, Rey gasped and staggered backwards as her head exploded in pain.  Memories flashed before her eyes.  He was searching her mind for something, and he was not being gentle about it.

“Stop… it hurts,” she cried.

Immediately, the pain disappeared.  Still panting, she fell to her knees, gripping her head.

The door opened to reveal an acolyte who gave a short bow.

“Master Ren, your transport has arrived,” he hissed.

“Good.  Have the medic sent to my ship,” Kylo answered.

“Master, the First Order reassigned the medic to—“

“Yes.  One of the droids then. Go!” he snapped.

The apprentice bowed again and left.

“Where are you going?” Rey mumbled, still holding her head in her hands.

“I promised you sunlight.  You will see that I keep my promises.  We are going to Korriban.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't fit everything into one chapter, so I'll publish two right now. Chapter 17 coming in a few...


	17. The Island

“Abnormal increase in blood flow to fourth quadrant of the brain, section 8,” DeeDee intoned.  “No other remarkable abnormalities to report.”

“Nothing?” Kylo Ren snapped.  “Nothing at all?”

“Puncture wound of .5 units in length above the right shoulder blade—no infection detected.  Mild dehydration overall.”

Rey lay very still on the small metal bunk.  He was wearing his helmet again.  He’d put it on well before they’d boarded his transport and though she couldn’t see his reaction, she thought she could detect something in his voice—panic.

“Again!” he demanded.

For the third time, DD-13 turned toward her and a flash of bright, green light caused her to close her eyes as she was scanned.

“No further abnormalities to report,” DeeDee repeated.

“I’m no use to you now,” Rey decided.  “I’ve been damaged—haven’t I?  I can’t feel anything… not anger, not hatred… not even love or happiness.  How irksome that must be for you.  I’ll never be the great, dark weapon you intended.”

“Temporary.  It’s only temporary. There’s no damage. No reason to believe that—“

“You said that this numbness would go away after I slept.  It hasn’t.  You don’t know that it’s temporary.  I think it very likely that it isn’t.  I suppose Snoke will order you to kill me now, and like the good pet that you are, you’ll follow his orders, won’t you?”  Rey yawned and sat up, as though the answer was inconsequential.

She could feel his anger and frustration.  It was building, like a dark cloud on the horizon.  A few more words and the storm would come.

“It’s something of a relief, really,” she shrugged.  “You’ve spent all this time playing with my head, trying to manipulate me into feeling what you wanted me to feel… fear, anger, hatred, and sometimes… sometimes it even seemed like you wanted me to feel…”

Rey allowed her voice to trail off as she smirked and raised an eyebrow suggestively.  His gloved hand tightened into a fist.

“Anyhow, its back-fired, hasn’t it?  Do you suppose Snoke will really kill you as well?  How ironic that would be, to know that even as a Dark apprentice, I’ve managed to serve the Resistance—“

His lightsaber blazed hotly, its beam flashed through the air so rapidly as he brought it down, that it looked like a blur of red light.  Kylo Ren whirled and slashed through the mounted table beside him, swinging his blade again and again until the table was reduced to a pile of smoking bits of black metal.

He was panting as he straightened up and replaced his hilt.

“It really is too bad that YOUR anger couldn’t be weaponized,” Rey sneered, “you never would have needed Starkiller--”

Rey’s hands flew to her throat. Her air was gone!  She couldn’t breathe. Panicking she glanced toward Kylo Ren only to see that his hand was extended toward her.  He was… he was using the Force to choke her.

In an instant, her air flow returned and she sucked in so great a breath that she coughed and then gasped for more.  Her eyes stung with tears as she massaged her throat.

“Rey…” he mumbled.  “I didn’t…”

He took a few cautious steps, his hand still reaching for her.  Rey scooted back as far as she could on the bunk, pressing her back to the wall.

“Don’t touch me!” she hissed. “Get away from me.”

He stopped, his open hand curling into a fist which dropped to his side.

“Fear,” he growled.  “You feel fear.  Did you think you could lie to me, scavenger?”

She realized her mistake at once, but the anger she had so carefully hidden away burst forth at that moment to render her heedless.

“I lied!” she agreed, her voice rising shrilly.  “You’re right, I lied!  You want the truth, monster?  The truth is that I hate you.  I hate you so much that it scares me.  You are a loathsome, irredeemable beast, and I regret not killing you when I had the chance.  Yes, I hate you, and I fear you, and I understand now why the Sith kill their masters.”

The dark figure before her slowly nodded its head before turning away from her.

“Then… you have made progress,” he remarked, and before she could gather her wits enough to make sharp reply he was gone.

Rey leapt up, intent on not letting him get away, but found the door had locked behind him.  She was a prisoner once more.

With a mostly suppressed scream of rage, she picked up the nearest thing to her—a medical holodex—and hurled it at the wall.

“Are you injured, Patient 42590?” DeeDee inquired.

“No!  I’m… I’m just…” Rey threw her hands up and shook her head.  She didn’t have the words to describe her condition.

“Then may I take the opportunity to relay a communication that was left for you?”

“A communication?” she repeated.

“I was given a communication with instructions to deliver it to you at such a time when you would be alone.”

“From Brick?  A message from Brick?  I thought he—“

“MT 5927 was reassigned.  May I relay his communication?”

“Yes, yes please,” she agreed.

A few seconds later, Brick’s tiny, transparent figure flickered into being as it crouched before her in the light of a beam which shone down from DD-13’s chest cavity.  He seemed to prod at something unseen before standing up to face her.

“If you are listening to this, I suppose you already know what I’ve done.  I’m sorry, Rey.  I never said I was a brave man.  If it’s any consolation, I really did want to leave with you.  You made me believe that it was possible… for a little while anyway.  I’m leaving tonight, but there is something I want you to have—something you might need if you get the chance to run.  Good luck, Rey, and I AM sorry.”

Brick’s ghostly form moved out of frame and then the light flickered and went off.

“What has he done?” Rey whispered.  “DeeDee, what does he mean?  What is it he’s done?”

“I believe what MT5927 referred to is the deal he made with Commander Ren.  He traded information in order to be reassigned to his old position aboard the Finalizer,” DD-13 replied.

“What information?”

“That you were planning to escape and that he encouraged you in order to learn what your intentions were.”

“No.”

“Yes.  Though the information he traded was not technically correct to my knowledge.  He informed Commander Ren that you had promised him money and other rewards from the Resistance if he would procure Resurrection Dust and use it to help you bribe the captain of a resupply ship to let you on board.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“I can assure you that I was in attendance, though I did not make any formal recording of--”

“Why?  Why would he do such a thing?” she cried, twisting her hands together in her lap.

“I would hypothesize that his decision was made as a direct result of the human feeling of fear.  Commander Ren is well-known for the ability to discern the secrets of those around him.  MT5927 was most likely afraid of discovery and subsequent punishment.”

Rey wrapped her arms around herself and squeezed tightly.  She wanted to scream.  Kylo Ren knew that she had merely been acting the part of a loyal apprentice, and also believed that she attempted to enlist the assistance of a First Order Stormtrooper in an escape attempt.  In fact, he had likely been informed of them before she had killed Yure, perhaps even longer, and yet he had made no mention of it.

“Would you like to see what—“

The door hissed open and Kylo Ren entered the room.

“…what the medical holodex suggests for shallow puncture wounds?”  DeeDee finished.

“There’s been a change of plans.  Our arrival on Korriban will be delayed,” Kylo announced.

“Why?” she asked.

He stood silently before her, no doubt taking in her miserable form and wet eyes.  He did not answer.

“Fine. I don’t care,” she mumbled.

Rey winced and moved away as he crouched down beside her.  She could see herself reflected in his visor.  It reminded her of the time she had awoken on Starkiller—seeing him for the first—no, second time, crouched before her, waiting for her to wake up.  It hadn’t occurred to her then, but it was odd position to take—certainly it couldn’t have been comfortable.  How long had he waited that way, watching her sleep?  He was watching her now.

“When I was a child, and my mother brought me to Master Luke, you didn’t want to teach me.  You didn’t want to be bothered with me at all, but you didn’t kill me along with Master Luke’s other students.  Why?  Did you know then what I was capable of?  Were you planning to use me even then?” she asked.

“No.”

“Why did you spare me?”

“Ben Solo saved you.  It was his last act.”

“Because you killed him that day as well,” she murmured.

“Yes.”

“Why did you do it?  Why did you destroy everything Master Luke had worked for?”

“Because it was necessary.”

“Necessary to kill children—padawans?”

“Yes.  They were corrupted—loyal to greedy politicians, or homeworld alliances.  Even those that had not yet become pawns had loyalties not to principles, but to people or things.  Luke Skywalker was training children to become nothing more than mercenaries.”

“And you knew better than him,” she scoffed.

“Yes.  If I had allowed the others to leave as they wished—as Master Luke ordered me—they would have done as they intended and supported the Separatist movement within the Senate.  The Republic would have torn itself apart.  We would have returned to how things were during the Clone Wars.  I did what I had to do.  By ending the Jedi, I destroyed a lingering threat to our galaxy.  The Jedi have outlived their usefulness.”

“You did what Snoke told you to do,” she said quietly, still wary of his anger.

“No, Rey.  It was my decision, and it was not made easily.”

Rey sighed heavily and massaged her forehead with the palm of her hand.  She suspected that he was lying.  Whether it was to her or to himself she couldn’t say.

“Rey, come with me.  There is something I want you to see.”

She had long since lost track of the days which had passed between her capture and the present time.  Finn would not come for her, nor would master Luke.  Even Brick had betrayed her, taking with him her only means of escape.  She was alone again, abandoned, and though Kylo Ren was to blame for all of it, he was also crouched before her, his voice gentle, and his gloved hand reaching for hers.

She could tell herself that she was only pretending not to hate him-- that she was pretending in order to catch him off guard later on, but that wasn’t entirely true.  She didn’t want to be alone.  She wanted to believe that there was still something good in him that might be salvaged, and in the rare moments when he spoke quietly and his touch was gentle, she could almost believe him… almost.

That she wanted to believe him, even after everything that he had done to her likely spoke to how badly he’d brutalized her.  This, she understood, and yet it changed nothing.

What was it he’d taught her about intent?  She reached out with her mind, surprised at how easy it was now—but then, they were no longer on Baudere—and brushed across the surface of his thoughts.  She saw herself through his eyes—small, cowering away from him, choking, staring back at him with eyes full of unshed tears.  She felt his reaction to her fear, an almost visceral pain, and the corresponding wave of self-hatred that followed.  He was sorry.  He intended to make it up to her.

Reluctantly, she took the hand he offered and allowed him to help her to her feet.

He led her to the door.  She gave one last look to DD-13 before following him.

The hallway led to the ship’s cockpit where the pilot glanced back once over his shoulder at them, and then studiously ignored their presence.

“Look,” he said, nodding toward the window.  “Do you see it?”

She saw nothing for a moment, but then a small, blue planet came into view.

“Is it Korriban?” she murmured.

“No.  That is Nawa—a planet just beyond the outer rim which holds very little life above the oceans.”

As they approached, and the planet grew larger, she could see that it was mostly water—a tiny planet covered in vast oceans.

“What are we doing here?” she asked.

His answer was little more than a nod in the direction of the planet.  He wanted her to watch their approach.  There was something he wanted her to see.

The ship descended into the atmosphere of Nawa, and for a second Rey was blinded by the brightness.  After so long in the dark, the reflection of the sunlight across the water was too much for her eyes.

_“You’re so lonely… so afraid to leave.   At night, desperate to sleep, you’d imagine an ocean…”_

The words he’d spoken in the interrogation room long ago, echoed in her memory.  Could it be?

The ship coasted over the ocean, descending lower and lower. They were going to land.  Across the horizon, a faint smear of green and gold appeared.

_“I see it.  I see the island…”_

Rey sucked in a sharp breath as the island seemed to grow from the distant edge of the water.  She could see it—that same island.  It was real.  It was all real.

She whirled to face him.

“How did you find it?  How did you know that it was a real place?” she demanded.

“We’ll be landing soon,” he said.  “Here is the sunlight you wanted so desperately.  We have very little time to spare.  I suggest you make use of it.”

The transport slowed and hovered over the beach before making a careful descent to land.  Rey turned and quickly made her way down the hallway to the door-ramp. She could hear his footsteps behind her, but she was faster and raced down the ramp the minute it was open.

She squinted in the brightness of what seemed to be a mid-morning sun, and made her way sure-footed through the sand.

There was someone she had to find—something she suspected but couldn’t quite believe.  She rounded the curve of the beach and raced toward the woods, finding the old, overgrown footpath almost immediately.

It was real, it was all real… and if the ocean existed, and the island existed, then the boy was real as well.

She followed the footpath all the way to the house, stopping for a moment before the wide steps that led up to the entryway.  It was all the same, even the long white curtains which blew with the wind through the open doorways and tall windows.

Kylo Ren had stopped before he’d gotten that far into her memory.  He’d never seen the boy who lived in that house alone.  A boy she’s always believed she’d invented.  A boy who

Rey flew up the steps, pausing for a moment on the threshold of the arched entryway.  The white curtain whipped at her body as though struggling to pull her inside.

“Hello?” she called.  “Hello?”

The curtain flapped again, and now that she was closer, she could see that it wasn’t quite as white as she remembered.  She could see the frayed edges around the bottom and the way old dried leaves skittered across the doorway and into the house.  There was a musty smell which seemed to come from within.

“Hello?” she called again, bravely stepping inside.

The house was almost as she remembered, with the bottom level open to the elements, but she had never seen debris from the forest spreading about the floor, and it was empty of furniture.  It gave her the unwelcome feeling that the house had been abandoned long since.

There was one more place she should look.  Carefully, she crossed the debris-strewn floor to the winding staircase and made her way to the upper floor where slept.  She was greeted by the same room, the same bed, and the same views of the ocean from the balcony window, but he was not there.  He had not been there for a long while.

Footsteps on the staircase made her heart race with anticipation, and she turned to see… to see the dark figure of Kylo Ren approaching her.

“He’s gone,” she whispered, more to herself than to him.

Kylo reached up and unlatched his helmet.  Slowly, he lifted it from his head, and let it drop heavily to ground.

“Is he?”

“You know, don’t you?  You saw my memories… all of them.  You found this place.  You found it when I didn’t even know it was real. You must know what happened to him, that boy who lived here,” she prodded.

“After what happened on Yavin 4, there was a time—a short time—when I thought that I might still go home.  I thought that mother, at least, would understand why I had to do it.  She’d spent her entire life in the Senate, only to have them turn on her when her true parentage was discovered.  I don’t know if I can count the number of assassination attempts she endured.

“I ran and hid in the place I knew she’d be most likely to find me—the very place where she and Han Solo went into hiding when the Separatist Plot to assassinate her was discovered… ” His voice trailed off as he brushed past Rey to glance out across the balcony.  “I waited a long time, but she never came, and neither did Father.  I was alone.  There were many nights when I couldn’t sleep—when the screams of those doomed ones echoed too loudly in my mind—and so, I would imagine a vast desert.  A silent, lonely place where a small girl huddled beneath a vast night sky, as alone as I myself was.”

“No,” she whispered. “You’re using my memories to try and manipulate my feelings again—“

“Am I, Rey?  Search your memories, you know it to be true.  It never occurred to me that you had watched me, just as I had watched you.  I saw the recognition in your eyes the very first time you laid eyes on me—though you convinced yourself otherwise.  I knew it would be you.  Before Starkiller, before Takodana even… the very first time it was whispered that a girl from Jakku had been spotted with the droid, I knew it would be you.  I hoped it wouldn’t be, but deep down, I knew.”

“That boy—the one from my dreams, he was nothing like you,” she shook her head, backing away.

“We have both changed a great deal, have we not?” he countered, advancing on her as she stepped back again.

“You hoped it wouldn’t be me… why?” she demanded.

He stopped, seeming to consider it for a moment.

“On Yavin 4, I had planned to end the Jedi that day.  I had planned to act quickly, catch the group by surprise, and kill every one of them before they knew what was happening.  I knew that Master Luke had grown weak, and would never be able to kill his sister’s son, and so I planned to deal with him last, and then, when I knew that there would be no more Jedi, I would kill myself.  I hadn’t planned on you.  I hadn’t planned on my hand faltering when I raised my blade above your sleeping body.  I hadn’t planned on feeling pity, or mercy. I hadn’t planned on Ben Solo’s weakness destroying my resolve, but that is what happened.  I let you live.  I let your mother live, and I allowed Luke Skywalker to escape.  I lost my only opportunity to destroy the Jedi quickly and entirely because the light in you was stronger than the dark in me.  I was… afraid of you.”

“Afraid of me?” she repeated.

“Yes.  There is no lasting balance between the light and dark sides of the Force.  Eventually, the scales will tip one way or the other.  We are bound, you and I, but we cannot exist beside one another as we are—either you will succumb to the Dark or…”

“Or you will be pulled to the Light,” she finished.

“That will never happen, Rey.”

“If what you’re telling me is true, then it has happened before,” she argued.

“I am stronger now.  Stronger than I’ve ever been.  The scale between us has already begun to tip, and I think we both know which direction it will fall.”

Rey crossed her arms and shook her head defiantly.

“So certain, are you?  You don’t know everything, Kylo Ren!”

He took another step towards her.  Rey stood her ground, tilting her head back to glare up at him, refusing to be intimidated.  Kylo lifted his hand to gently cup her chin.

“You’re right,” he agreed. “I didn’t know that the little girl would grow up to be so…“

His thumb slowly traced the line of her jaw.

“Stop!” she said, pushing his hand away.

She turned away, intending to storm off, but he was faster, catching her around the waist with one arm to pull her against himself.

She could feel his hot breath on the back of her neck.

“I didn’t know that I would think about her every moment I’m awake and dream about her while I sleep,” he whispered.

Rey shivered as she felt his lips caress her ear.

“I didn’t know that I’d want her this way,” he whispered.  “And I certainly didn’t know… that she would feel the same.”

“I… I don’t,” she lied. “You’re wrong.  I don’t feel that way at-at all.”

His lips skimmed the back of her neck.  She gasped, and as she did, his arm tightened around her waist, pressing her against himself, so that she could feel what strained beneath his robes.

“Tell me to stop then,” he mumbled against her neck.

She could feel his tongue run lightly down her spine and across her shoulder as his free hand moved up to cup her breast.  He bit down gently as he squeezed her chest.

Rey whimpered as her body went limp against him, and immediately his hand went down, his fingers digging painfully into her inner thigh as he pulled her legs apart.

“STOP!” she shrieked, struggling against the arm that still restrained her.

He let go at once, and Rey stumbled forward, turning to face him.

She wished that she hadn’t.  He was breathing heavily and his eyes were dark and burning as he stared back at her.  She swallowed thickly, trying to think of something to say, some insult or threat to hurl at him, but her mind had gone blank and her mouth was dry and she wanted… she wanted…

She couldn’t deny it.  He was like a black hole, and every time she got too close to him, she could feel herself being sucked in.  Yes, she wanted him.

With an almost savage cry, she flung herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck to bring his lips to hers, and when he moaned in relief against them, she bit his lip and threw her arms up as he yanked her shift up and over her head.  Her hands tore desperately at his belt, but he caught them, as he swept her up and dropped her on the bed.

He undressed quickly, ripping his cowl off and pulling his robes over his head.  She reached for him, pulling him down on top of herself to kiss him savagely, moaning against his mouth as his hand moved down her torso and between her legs.  He paused and leaned away, still staring intently at her as he brought his hand up to suck one finger.  His hands were fast—practiced, perhaps— for an instant later, she felt his wet finger trace around her hole and slip inside.

She gasped again, closing her eyes as his finger slid in and out of her.

“Rey,” he growled.  “Look at me.”

She opened her eyes to see his face above hers, just as he added another finger.  She whined, moving against his thrusting hand.

“Look at me,” he hissed.  “You will not pretend I am someone else.”

She moaned and nodded her head in agreement.

He withdrew his fingers.  She almost cried out, but her breath caught in her throat as she felt the head of his cock pressed against her opening.  He was staring into her eyes as he whispered:

“Rey?”

She nodded again, closing her eyes tightly as she felt him slowly push into her.

“Look at me,” he murmured.

She opened her eyes to stare into his, shuddering beneath him as he stroked almost unbearably slow, making sure she felt every inch.

“P-please,” she gasped.

His lips twisted into their familiar smirk as he thrust hard up into her.

Rey screeched, raking her nails across his shoulder, and driven on by her cries he began to stroke faster and faster.  He slipped his hand between their bodies, his fingers working her clit.

“Rey,” he groaned.

She could feel it coming, building, a powerful explosion, and when it happened, she cried out and heard his echoing cry as he froze, and then collapsed on top of her, breathing heavily.

Still trying to catch her breath, Rey turned her head to the side, glancing out the open doors to the balcony and to the glare of sunlight reflecting upon the water beyond.


	18. The Dune

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know. It's been a while. Maybe more than a while. Thought I'd start it up again. Let's see if I can finish it this time.

The sound of distant waves crashing against the beach did little to keep the silence between them from weighing on her.

Rey turned on her side, away from him, and curled into a protective position. Though she didn’t speak, her mind was working at a furious pace to justify what had just occurred. Her natural instinct was to jump up and immediately find her clothing. To be so exposed before him, now that her moment of weakness had passed, was terrifying.

And she would have done just that, if only… if only… he weren’t laying there, completely still, his eyes wide and open, transfixed upon the ceiling as though he were terrified of it suddenly collapsing on him.

Resolved to do something, she swallowed hard and gave a short, heavy sigh.

“This was… a mistake,” she began, “I think we should get up and continue on to Korriban… and forget this.”

She waited a moment, hoping her words would force him to move or respond in some way. It would be easier to dress if he were doing the same.

“Kylo?” she whispered.

She waited, but received no answer. With another heavy sigh, she wrapped her arms across her chest, shielding her nudity, and made to sit up, but he was faster. His arm, heavy and restraining, slid around her, and held her down.

“You still believe you can escape,” he hissed against her ear. This was not a question, his words were spoken in certainty.

“I will not be your weapon, nor will I be your plaything,” she snapped.

“I am offering you freedom. Freedom from Luke Skywalker’s vapid dogma—freedom from a life of servitude to insipid bureaucrats. Your Resistance is just as flawed as the Senate itself. How do you think we discovered that General Organa was searching for Skywalker? Our intel comes from the highest ranks of your ridiculous little army. Do you think your leaders can’t be bought?”

“You’re a liar. You can’t offer me freedom, not when you’re more a slave than I will ever—“

“Sshh!” he warned, wrapping his hand over her mouth. “I’ve been very, very patient with you. I’ve treated you well, protected you, trained you. I could have tortured you. I could have broken you…”

His fingers curled against her face, stroking her cheek as he spoke.

“I have never lied to you—unlike Luke Skywalker. What more would you have me do?”

“Release me,” she mumbled through his fingers.

His hand moved to her hair, which had mostly come undone, and she winced as he tugged at one of the remaining twists, pulling it loose and smoothing the strands behind her ear.

“Release you? What do you think would come of it? Do you think you could go back to the way things were? Would you be Skywalker’s padawan again? Could you follow him still, even knowing that he lied to you about your abilities? Do you think you can escape me, even if you run to the farthest corner of the galaxy? You and I… you and I are…” His words trailed off, and though she would not look at him, she could feel his eyes upon her.

“That may be,” she murmured. “Perhaps I never will escape you, but I can assure you that you will never turn me. I will never embrace the dark side--”

“Perhaps not,” he conceded, twisting one long strand of her dark hair slowly around his finger.

Rey moved to push his hand away, but he caught her by the wrist and lifted her hand to his lips, lightly kissing her thumb before gently biting it. She shivered and finally dared to look at him. The intensity he stared back at her with caused her to flush.

“Is it… is it always going to be like this?” she whispered.

“Not usually, no. It was over too quickly. I’m not always so—“

“No I didn’t mean…” Rey’s attempt at reassurance collapsed into a strange sort of laugh that seemed to force its way out of her. “Even Kylo Ren finds the sun on the other side of the dune stronger,” she said, smothering her laughter behind her hand.

“What do you mean by that?” he asked, his voice gentle. He was still watching her intently.

“Nothing. An old saying we have on Jakku. Life there… every part of your life was so focused on survival—scavengers are loners mostly. It’s dangerous to trust someone else, but that didn’t mean that it never happened. Sometimes, among the younger ones, two would pair off, and for a time, they would leave Niima Outpost at night and meet somewhere out among the dunes. And then time would go by and one would steal a ration from the other, or one might help themselves to a bit of the other’s scrap haul, or maybe they might begin to meet another person out there in the dunes at night. It never ends well. The old ones would say all sort of stupid things came out of a person’s mouth on the other side of the dune—the sun was stronger on that side, it cooked their brains. It was supposed to be funny, because the young ones were meeting out there at night. What they meant was that people will say all sort of ridiculous things after they… well, I suppose you know what I mean.”

When she realized that he was still watching her thoughtfully, she flushed again.

“I don’t mean to say that you’re ridiculous,” she mumbled.

Instead of answering, he traced one finger slowly down the side of her neck and then down her chest, his eyes following his hand. Rey swallowed nervously.  
“I remember you here… in this house,” she said. “Why? When I was little, whenever I closed my eyes at night, I would see you here. Standing on the balcony, looking out over the sea, or sometimes walking along the shore. Always silent, alone…”

His hand moved to her hip, gripping it tightly for a moment before he released her to run his fingers lightly down her leg and up again.

“And then you were gone…” she remembered. “And then it was just the house, and the island and the water, and I wondered for a long time what had happened.”

He dropped his head to kiss the hollow at the base of her neck.

“That’s when Snoke found you, wasn’t it? That’s when you… when you turned.”

His nails scratched lightly across her inner thigh, and Rey sucked in a sharp breath.

“Why are we going to Korriban? You haven’t said a word about it and I-”

Her voice was muffled against his lips as he kissed her, his hand moving just as quickly to slide beneath her and press her to himself, and against her leg she could feel him grow hard again. For the briefest of moments she welcomed it, the heat of his body, the pressure of his hand, the anticipation between her legs… all of this quickly becoming something she wanted, craved even.

Pushing off from him, she rolled to her side, and took a quick breath of air, steeling herself.

“No!” she said.

“No?” he repeated, and she thought she heard him laugh to himself under his breath.

“No. It was a mistake. I was weak. Confused. You’ve kept me a prisoner, you’ve hurt me, tortured me with your sick training, manipulated me. I won’t. I won’t do this again! I don’t trust you. Can’t you understand that? This is all part of your plan. This is about you and control and not about… not about..”

“Not about what, Rey?” he asked, his voice unbearably calm.

Instead of answering, she curled in on herself, bringing her knees to her chest and closing her mouth against the ridiculous thing that wanted to suggest itself.

“Do you want me to love you, Rey?”

“Shut-up. You aren’t capable of such a thing.”

“Was it always about love for you, little Rey? Even on Jakku, when it was fast and hard out on the sand.. was it love then, or just a need?”

She flinched at the suggestion. Was that what he thought? She had never had a need on Jakku for such a thing. She was scarcely able to keep herself fed.

“I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t need this place, this island. I don’t need that boy either. I found what I was looking for, and I sleep fine at night. Somewhere my friends are waiting for me to come home, somewhere my master is searching for me, and because of that, you’ll never be able to turn me. Do what you will.”

She reached down and snatched her discarded tunic from the floor, pulling it over her head roughly. Without turning to see his reaction, she left swiftly, fleeing the abandoned house to run anywhere else.

There was nowhere to go of course, nowhere to run to. The island was too small and the ocean too large. At least within the ship she could close a physical door against his presence—have the small comfort in the false illusion that she could keep him out.

At the bottom of the ramp DD-13 stood at silent attention.

“Patient Rey, may I complete my directive now?” the droid asked.

“I… umm… I don’t remember what we were—“

“MT-5927 left something in my possession that I was ordered to give to you when not in the presence of any member of the first order,” he reminded her.

“Yeah, yeah, I suppose so. What is it, DeeDee?”

In answer, the droid extended his arm. The cover of the small surplus storage snapped open, and there, were extra steri-shots or bacti-ointment was normally kept, gleamed the hilt of a lightsaber.

The lightsaber she had lost on the Resurrection Field after she was first captured.

Her head cleared instantly.

“I thought it was lost,” she muttered, reaching for it.

“I believe 5927 came across it during his last run to the Fields to gather Resurrection Dust. He said that you would probably know what to do with it.”

“Thank-you, Dee-Dee,” Rey said, glancing warily behind herself before she snatched the hilt and stuffed it under her tunic.

Hurrying aboard, she made it to her cabin without encountering any of the Stormtroopers and stuffed the hilt beneath the thin pad that lined her berth. Whatever happened now, whatever dark purpose Kylo Ren had in going to Korriban, she would be prepared.

It was only minutes before the hum of the engines beneath her signaled the ship’s imminent departure. Kylo Ren had boarded then, and the closed door of her cabin had at least offered her some scant protection this time. He had not bothered to check that she was aboard. Why would he? He could feel her there and if she tried, she knew that she would feel him too. The heavy thud, thud, thud of his signature. She wondered if it he was telling the truth when he’d said that she would never be able to escape or hide from him. That he would be able to find her no matter where she went.

If that was true, she would now always be a danger to anyone around her. It would effectively sideline her from most all the missions that the Resistance ran, as most of them required stealth. If that was true, she really only had one option—she would have to kill him.

But as she lay on her bunk, and the transporter lurched into lightspeed, she didn’t imagine killing him. She remembered his face above her as he gripped her thighs. “Look at me,” he whispered. “Look at me, Rey.”

She groaned, covering her face. Lying there, huddled into a miserable ball, she eventually fell asleep.

 

Forward of Rey’s cabin, Kylo Ren sat upon a single berth of his own, his mask on the floor beside his feet. Another mask, this one warped from fire, sat upon the table facing him, and though he was focused on it, and his lips moved as though he prayed, in his hands he twisted the thin leather band he had earlier pulled from her hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "The call of Korriban is strong, but it is the call of the dead." ―Darth Sion
> 
> If I don't publish the next chapter right away, don't give up on me! It's been so long since I've worked on this piece that I've forgotten a lot of the more canon details about Korriban. I want to get it right, and all day now, I've been going through my old notes and some of the star wars guides to try and make sure that Korriban is kosher, but I promise it is coming soon!


	19. Korriban

_The island._

_She was back on the island and stood surveying the unending ocean from the balcony.  It should have been peaceful, but her mind was anything but.  She didn’t have to look at her hands—his hands really, to know that they were shaking._

_“I’ve failed them, all of them,” she whispered in his voice.  Her vision spiraled farther back to an earlier time, when Master Luke walked slowly with his hands beside his back at Ben Solo’s side:_

_“But the light can never destroy the dark, Ben.” He shook his head slowly._

_“Why not?” she demanded._

_“It is not the nature of light to destroy.  It may chase the dark away, or confine it to shadows, or illuminate it for all to see, or if we are fortunate, stay in balance with it, but it can never destroy.  Light gives life, it is darkness which takes it.”_

_“The Jedi have had to take life often enough to keep that balance and—“_

_“And perhaps the Jedi were never really completely of the light.  Perhaps the Jedi have always existed in the grey area between the two.”_

_“Then what can destroy the darkness?” she snapped, feeling his anger at Master Luke’s calm self-assurance bubbling towards the surface._

_Master Luke gave a small, sad smile._

_“Patience.  Often enough, the darkness will destroy itself.”_

_On the balcony again, she clenched her head with his large hands and fell to her knees.  A voice whispered to her unendingly that Mother wouldn’t come, Father wouldn’t come, that Luke would strike him dead.  She only had one path to follow._

_She had already taken the first footsteps down that path and there was no way back.  Yet how could she go forward? She would never be strong enough.  She would never be able to—_

_The voice hissed promises to her, telling her to come to him.  Telling her that Ben Solo was already gone, but that he would be reborn as something far greater._

_Down by the ocean, a shade of a man stood looking up at her.  Horribly scarred and disfigured, he seemed to fade in and out, almost to the same rhythm with which the waves lapped the shore.  His appearance should have startled Ben, or caused him to wonder at the very least, but she did not feel that.  What she did feel was a determined, though grim, resolve._

_“Yes,” she whispered. “I understand.”_

 

Rey gasped and sat bolt upright.  The hum of the engine had lessened at some point during her sleep, signaling that they had left hyperspace and were probably approaching Korriban.

It only took a moment for her to notice that she felt off, dizzy and sick, like the morning after she had celebrated the destruction of Starkiller Base with Poe and his pilot friends.  There had been too many drinks that night and she had paid the price of it that morning.

Stumbling toward the fresher, she reached the tap, and drank in a few mouthfuls of cold water, splashing her face a few times for good measure as well.

Straightening up, she caught sight of her reflection for the first time since well before Ka’vec.  The face that stared back at her from the mirror above the tap was thin and pale.  Her cheeks had hollowed considerably, and the dark circles beneath her eyes made them seem overly large in her thin face.

Her hair, usually neatly confined, hung loose and matted.  She barely recognized herself.  Vexed at her own reflection, she ripped her fingers quickly through her hair a few times, twisted it tightly into a coiled bun, and secured it by jamming a stylus through it.

A tunic, simple, grey and clean, sat folded on the nearby ledge and this she changed into after retrieving the lightsaber and securing it to her leg with one of her old, soiled wraps.

Thus equipped and somewhat refreshed, she sat down on her bunk to wait. In an attempt to lessen the throbbing in her head, Rey attempted meditation, a habit that Master Luke had enforced daily while on Ach-To, and which she had neglected almost completely while on Baudere.  It was at this point she realized why Master Luke had taken such pains to stress the importance of daily training.  She could feel the Force—which was, in itself, a great relief after so much time on the dark planet—but she struggled to connect to it.

By the time the Stormtroopers came for her, she had made little progress in her attempts, which only served to further her frustration.  And so, upon reaching the bridge and the silent, brooding form of Kylo Ren, she could not help the wave of anger that swept over her at the sight of him.

He stood facing away from her, his hands clasped lightly behind his back, turning his head only slightly at her approach, so that she could see his face in profile against the backdrop of the red planet beyond the glass.

“Beginning descent to Moraband, sir,” an officer informed him.

He gave a slight nod before turning back to face the planet.  She would have spoken then, but a short shrill beeping distracted her.

“Incoming transmission from the Finalizer, sir.”

Kylo nodded again, though he took his time turning to face the holoscreen.  The transmission glowed immediately to life, and Rey found herself being stared down by a pair of cold eyes.  She took in the charcoal grey uniform bearing the First Order insignia, the precisely-styled red hair, and the cruel set of his mouth next.  This was an officer, someone of great authority.  He had the air of someone who was certain of his own importance.

“Ren.  I see you’ve recovered from your injuries,” he greeted Kylo, glancing past Rey, “And I see your priorities are still… your own.”

“Give me your message and be quick about it, I have more pressing matters to attend to,” Kylo snapped—the dislike between the two was evident.

“Moraband is off limits by order of the Supreme Leader, as you well know.  Turn back at once or—“

“Your order is out-dated, general.  The Supreme Leader has requested that I train my apprentice in the old ways, a task I cannot accomplish without landing on Korriban.”

“You will wait while I confirm—”

“I will not wait.  I will do as I have been ordered, and anyone who tries to stop me will answer to the Supreme Leader.” Kylo motioned to one of his officers and the transmission was immediately cut.

As the enraged face of the general immediately faded to black, Rey took a few cautious steps toward Kylo Ren.

“Your planet has two names?” she asked.

“Korriban is an old name for it, its true name.”

“What does that mean... it’s ‘off limits’?  What is it about Korriban which makes it off limits for the First Order?”

“It is a banned planet for all factions.  Even the star maps of the new republic have purposely excluded it.”

“Why?” she repeated.

“It is a dead planet, abandoned and left in waste after a millennia of wars.  There is little left on Korriban but ruins and tombs.”

“There are other dead planets on the map, why is this one banned?” she asked again, sensing something terrible in his reticence to answer.

He was silent for a long moment, and when he spoke again, he turned his attention back to the red planet and away from her.

“Korriban is the homeworld of the Sith.”

“The Sith?!” she repeated, back-stepping before she realized there was nowhere she could run.  “I will no-“

He moved faster than she expected.  His arm shot forward, fingers splayed, and with that, every muscle in her body locked—even her jaw.  She could breathe only through her nose.  She remembered this hold.  Remembered when he had used it on her in the forest of Takodana, and felt a surge of anger.

She closed her eyes and pushed with her mind, and immediately felt her body go slack.  When she opened her eyes, Kylo Ren was taking deep breaths, staring back at her wild-eyed, almost with a look of pleading.

“Sir, we’ve been issued orders not to la—“

Kylo’s light saber blazed to life in his hand.  He whirled and slashed through the seat the officer addressing him had only just stood up from, and then proceeded to reduce it to sparking ash with several more swings.  Cutting upwards, he held the point of the flickering blade before the officer’s throat.

“Land… the… ship,” he commanded, slowly enunciating each word.

“Yes, sir,” the officer mumbled stepping carefully backwards.

Confused, Rey watched him carefully.  His breathing was labored, and his eyes darted between the other crew members quickly, as though looking for a threat.  Something was more than wrong with the entire scene.

“You said that you were not in league with the Sith,” she reminded him, dropping her voice low enough to not be heard by the others.

“You will shut your mouth, or I will shut it for you permanently,” he hissed.

“I don’t believe you,” she decided. “You’re afraid.  You’re doing something that Snoke doesn’t want you to, aren’t you? What aren’t you telling me?”

He did not answer her.  Behind him the red planet grew larger, it filled the entire glass, casting the bridge in an eerie fiery glow.

“No escort.  Keep your men aboard,” Kylo Ren ordered before sweeping off.  Rey hurried after him.

“What are you up to?” she asked again after they had left the bridge.

“An integral part of your training…” he began.

“I don’t believe you.  Are you sweating?  You are.  Why are you lying to me?” she demanded.

He walked without speaking until reaching the cargo hold.  When she followed him into it, he spun to face her and made a swift cutting movement with his hand, sealing the door behind them.

Rey swallowed hard as he took first one and then another menacing step toward her.  She would not be cowed by him!  Lifting her chin and meeting his eye, she stood her ground, and when he reached for her with one gloved hand, she did not flinch.

His fingers lightly brushed her cheek.

“I had not meant to advance your training so far so fast,” he murmured.  “Perhaps you are not ready, but recent events have forced my hand.  I have no other option.  I would have liked…more time.”

“You’re going to kill me, aren’t you?” she guessed.

“No, little scavenger.  Korriban was abandoned by the Sith long ago, but the trials faced by all those aspiring to be masters in the dark force still exist.  The terentateks still make their homes in the tombs, the tuk’ata still hunt in the valley, and the dead which never die still wait.  You may not pass your trial, but that is not my intent.”

“Snoke hasn’t given you permission to train me here, has he?”

When he didn’t answer, she pulled away from his hand, and turned her back to him.

“Rey… you were right,” he said, his voice low.  She did not turn around, but she could sense him move a step closer.  “What you said to me all that time ago… I AM afraid.  I am afraid that I’m not as strong… as strong as…”

His words trailed off, but she knew.  She remembered.

“And _that_ is what you truly aspire to, Kylo Ren?” she whispered.  “Your most precious ambition is to be a dark lord wallowing in destruction and death and—“

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.  My grandfather was the greatest Jedi in a thousand years.  What he started—“

“What he started was the end of the Jedi.  What he started was war, and the rule of fear!”

“What he started was an end to this eternal battle between dark and light!” he growled.

Rey choked back the sob that was rising in her throat.  He was lost, truly lost.  The Chaata had said there was good in him still.  At times, she could almost convince herself that those words just might be true, but if he actually believed what he was saying… her thoughts moved to the lightsaber lashed to her thigh.  She would never be able to escape after killing him, but perhaps that was her fate.  The Chaata had been wrong about Kylo after all.

“When you said that you were not a Sith lord, I believed you,” she muttered.

“I spoke the truth.”

“Yet here we are, by your own words, Sith training.”

“This planet is a veritable stronghold of dark force.  Here it is concentrated in such great amount that every inch of this barren rock is saturated in it… and there are secrets here… ancient secrets kept safe by the guardians of the tombs.  Secrets that I-“

He stopped himself abruptly.

“Secrets that _you_ want,” she finished for him, picking up on his mistake at once.  “Secrets that Snoke doesn’t want you to have.”  Rey paused as the pieces of the puzzle began to fall into place.  “But when he ordered you to train me, you knew you could use that order to supersede the planetary ban.  You would appear to be obeying him even when you were not,” she stopped as the noise of the landing gear descending filled the cargo bay.

A moment later, the ramp lowered, thumping lightly against the rocky, red ground, filling the darkened hold with the dim sort of light one normally encountered at sunset.  The air seemed to grow stale around them, and as she breathed, the throbbing in her head seemed to increase.

“So what is it?” she asked, wincing slightly at the pain in her temples.  “What is this secret you’re willing to risk our lives for?”

“We haven’t much time.  Hux won’t come after us until he speaks with the Supreme Leader, but once he does, he will come after us with everything he’s got.”

“You think that he will try to kill us?”

“Possibly, but his orders will likely be to capture us alive.  When he does, I will be interrogated by the Supreme Leader about my actions, which I will willingly submit to.  I have weeks and weeks of memories training you, and he will see that I speak the truth about believing that you are ready to face the trials—especially after he sees what you did to that other apprentice.”

“And when he asks why you attempted to train me on Korriban without first obtaining his permission?  What then?  From what I’ve seen of your Supreme Leader, he doesn’t like his pawns doing anything of their own will.”

“I will have a reason to give him for that as well.  I have planned this for a long while, too long to allow for failure. Come,” he ordered, stalking down the ramp.

When she did not follow, he stopped.

“I said, come.”

“And I said, I want to know what I’m risking my life for.”

“For the secrets of the Dark Moon, an ancient weapon which can wipe out entire civilizations using only dark force, and which has already been acquired by the First Order. Coming, little scavenger?”  He disappeared down the ramp without another glance in her direction, fully confident of what she would chose.

She did not disappoint him.  Seconds later, they stood outside of an ancient, crumbling arrival port.  In the distance, cliffs rose carved with the giant figures of beings in long hooded cloaks, each holding a massive stone sword, driven point down into the ground.  The rocky gorge between the cliffs formed a road of sorts, which disappeared in the distant shadows. Beyond all this, she could just make out what she thought at first was a mountain, but realized was more likely a pyramid.

“You see before you the entrance to the Valley of Dark Lords.  Hurry, but stay sharp.  The Sith may be long gone, but the creatures who have always guarded their dead have never left.”

“I need a weapon,” she insisted following quickly behind him.

“Then I suggest you use the light saber you’ve stashed under your robe,” he answered.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited about where this is going! It's so much fun to start to tie together all the little threads you've been weaving through the plot. Stay tuned for some real action!


	20. The Valley

That general… what did he mean when he said you have your own priorities?” Rey wondered.

Ahead of her, Kylo Ren jerked his arm to the left, force-throwing another twisted lump of metal from the path.  There were many of these remnants littering the valley, artifacts of old wars perhaps.  If they were, they came from wars so ancient that even the practiced eyes of a scavenger couldn’t identify what they had once been part of.

He walked at a speed that forced her to jog in order to stay close enough to speak with him.  His legs were much longer and his strides wider to begin with, and with her headache and churning stomach, she had considered asking him to slow down.  Still, his hurry seemed to verify what he had said about the general coming after them, and he had not lost that wild-eyed look, which if she were bring honest, frightened her a little.

“He meant to imply that I put my will before the will of the Supreme Leader… that I am untrustworthy,” he answered with no emotion.

“He’s right though, isn’t he?  You are rebelling against Snoke’s order.  Kylo Ren is rebelling against the dark side,” she said, and a small thrill went through her as the words left her mouth.  For a few seconds, she imagined him returning home to General Organa’s open arms, imagined him greeting Master Luke and confessing his remorse, imagined standing by his side as they gave report about all they had discovered on the Dark Moon, imagined fighting together, coming home together…

He interrupted her fantasy with a disdainful scoff.

“I am not now, nor will I ever rebel against the dark side, and my priorities seldom diverge from those of the Supreme Leader.”

“You are diverging now, aren’t you?  Why?  You said the Dark Moon is a weapon which the First Order already has in its possession.  What could you possibly need to know about it that Snoke would keep from you… how to destroy it?” she guessed.

“No.”

“Then you want to learn how it works… so that you can use it yourself?”

“No.”

“Then perhaps you—“

“Perhaps the Supreme Leader thinks the Dark Moon’s secrets are safe here in their tomb, and perhaps I think that a more securely guarded site can be found.  My mother’s rebels have a long history of finding small secrets and then using them to destroy the grandest ambitions.  Perhaps I am only protecting him from underestimating my mother.  Perhaps, scavenger, you should focus more on what you are going to do when the Tuk’ata which has been stalking us since the entrance of the valley finally picks his moment and attacks.”

She whirled, igniting her saber as she scanned the boulder strewn road.

“They don’t stalk the way normal beasts do,” he called.  “They’re force sensitive creatures.  They don’t need to see you to know where you are.  What did I teach you about sensing intent?”

Rey’s face flushed at the memory.  That had been a training session she’s tried not to think about.  She hurried to catch up to him.  Her light saber still lit.

“If you had learned the lesson which I tried to impart,” Kylo continued, “then you would have sensed an intent to rip you limb from limb.”

Unrepentant yet curious, she did then attempt to use the Force and sense what she could.  She was immediately overcome by a wave of nausea which stopped her in her tracks.

“Keep moving,” he ordered.  “If you stop for too long, or try to leave the road, you invite attack.”

Rey took a few shaky steps, and then felt a hand beneath her arm steadying her.

“What is it?” he demanded, though his tone had lost some of its edge.

“Don’t know.  I… I’m sick, I think… sick since I woke up on the ship, and it’s getting worse.”

He gave a short sigh and rubbed his forehead in frustration.

“You’re resisting it again,” he warned.  “I’ve told you already, this planet has a greater concentration of dark force than any other, and you did not train long enough or hard enough with Skywalker to be able to resist it.  Your body is reacting to it as it would anything it considers a poison.  Even the accomplished Jedi Master Yoda succumbed to some amount of illness and hallucinations when he came to this valley.”

“Master Yoda?  Master Yoda trained Master Luke after… he’s dead though,” the throbbing in her head made it very difficult to think.  Her thoughts were disordered and hard to verbalize.

“Yes, yes, I know.  You must—“

“Why did Master Yoda come to this place?” she interrupted.

“Nevermind that now.  If you continue to resist you will be destroyed.  This is no empty threat.  You must open yourself to it, feel it become a part of you.  I know you can.  I’ve seen you do it, Rey. I trained you for this.  I trained you to survive.”

“Your training… I think all your training was an attempt to… to cause my mind to break.  That’s what Sith training is, isn’t it?  They torture you until you don’t trust your own thoughts anymore.  What is that?  Is that a Tuk’ata?” she said, and pointed.

His eyes followed the direction of her finger, before returning to her.

“Stop it, Rey!” he growled, his hand tightening around her elbow.  “Stop this right now.  You’re beginning to hallucinate and there are already more than enough real dangers.”

“What is that sound?” she gasped turning slowly away from him.

“Rey…” he said softly.

When she turned her attention back to him, she was rewarded with a swift slap to the face. She stumbled backwards and shook her head, which cleared instantly.  Her cheek smarted.

“How dare you!” she seethed.

“Watch your tongue, filthy scavenger!  You disappoint me.  You are weak and pathetic.  Too weak to live.  Your friends haven’t tried to find you, because you are of no use to them, and I see now, that you can be no use to me either.  If you—“

That was as far as he got.  With a surge of rage, Rey felt the power fill her, and then explode from the hand she raised.  Kylo Ren was blown off his feet. He fell and rolled to a crouched position.  Wasting no time, she gestured toward a slab of rock which had crumbled from the face of one of the nearby mausoleums and force-threw it towards him.  He dodged to the side, and lit his blade just as she managed to throw the next rock.  It exploded into a spray of stone chips as he swung.

Panting from the exertion, Rey took a step back, watching him cautiously.  He waited a moment before moving toward her.

“How do you feel now?” he asked.

“Angry,” she hissed.

 “Good. Stay that way.  We’ve managed to call the attention of more than just the Tu’kata.”

Though she was still considering burying him beneath a rock slide, she instead ran behind him as he hurried on.  She could feel the presence of other creatures now.  Giant creatures, ancient, cruel, and hungry.  They could sense her as well.

“How much farther?” she demanded.

“The Tomb of Naga Sadow… it’s there.”

He did not have to gesture, she could feel where he intended to go and her eyes found the place, farther up in the valley. Carved into the rock wall in relief, the giant face of a sneering Sith Lord stared at her with blind eyes.  Beneath his visage and framed by his powerful arms she could see a tall rectangular opening.

A bright spark of light distracted her, and she looked up to see first one, and then two transporters hurtling towards them.  She almost spoke to draw his attention to them when she noticed the third transporter.

Kylo swore under his breath and broke into a full run, his cape billowing behind him.  They wouldn’t make it before the ships landed, she could see as much, but she could sense his intent now, to get as close to the tomb as they could and then, if talks failed, attempt to fight their way through.

This surprised her-- Kylo Ren prepared to fight against soldiers of the First Order.  Whatever was in the Tomb, he must have wanted it badly, though she was not sure that she believed it had anything to do with the Dark Moon.  He might have gleaned memories of her mission on Ka’vec at some point during her imprisonment on Baudere and was only using the temptation of further knowledge to bend her to his will.  She did not trust him, but fighting the First Order was better than imprisonment on Baudere—even so vastly outnumbered.

The feeling of being watched and of impending attack grew as the ships descended.  There was restlessness in the valley of dead, and Rey soon began to think she heard whispers of threats that drifted from the open doorways in the rock walls.  She wondered if she was again beginning to hallucinate.

The first transporter landed before the doorway of Naga Sadow’s tomb and the others just beyond.  Stormtroopers filed out, arranging themselves in formation to await their approach.  It was impossible to tell how many, but certainly they were too many for her and Kylo Ren to take.

For his part, Kylo had slowed to a more dignified walk.  She could sense his irritation, which surprised her.  Surely, the wall of Stormtroopers between them and the Tomb should inspire something in him a little greater than irritation!

They were still a ways off, when a Stormtrooper in shining chromium descended the ramp. The armorweave cloak in red and black surely conferred some sort of important rank, but Rey was ignorant of First Order dress codes.

“Do not speak,” he hissed.  “Do not make any move until I do, and stay on your guard, the Tu’kata are gathering.”

As they approached, the cloaked Stormtrooper strode out to meet them.  Kylo stopped and waited for her to approach.

“Sir,” she greeted him.  “I have orders to escort you and the girl onboard the Finalizer.”

“Whose?” he snapped.

“General Hux, sir.”

“As you well know, Phasma, I do not answer to Hux—”

“The order was given by the General, sir, but he received it from the Supreme Leader only moments ago.”

“That was fast,” sneered Ren.  “Too fast.  As I’m sure you are aware, I have my own methods when communicating with the Supreme Leader.  He knows that there has been a second defector among your ranks, and that once again he was allowed to escape.  He no longer considers Hux competent.  I am afraid, Captain, that General Hux has exceeded the limits of his command.  He is acting on his own, I assure you.  If you attempt to interfere with my orders, you will not be answering to Hux, but to the Supreme Leader, himself.”

His words had a profound effect on the soldier.  Though her face was obscured behind her helmet, Rey could sense her confusion.  The blaster she held upright against her chest dropped slightly.

“Sir, I… I believe we may have a misunderstanding.  If you’ll just come with me.”

Kylo Ren’s light saber blazed to life in his hand as he adjusted his stance.  Rey took this to mean that she should be ready as well, and she held her own saber in a fighting grip, but his intent was not—

A shock of warning shot through her, just before the first Tuk’ata leapt from the top of the tomb and landed on top of the transporter.

It was a gigantic beast on four legs, its claws at least six inches long, with triple rows of teeth, and long tail lined by spiny projections that it whipped back and forth.  From its side projected two spiky extensions, which she at first mistook for wings, but which Ren later assured her were poisonous stingers.

The Tu’kata’s growl echoed from the rock walls as two more of the beasts dropped gracefully from the top of the tomb, circling behind and to the side of the assembled troopers.  With a snarl, the first leapt down, pinning a whiteclad trooper beneath its massive paw before chomping down on the soldier’s blaster arm and ripping it off.  The other two snarled and attacked, and in an instant the sound of laser blasters and screams filled the silent valley.

Captain Phasma had turned her attention momentarily to the fray, and Kylo seized the opportunity to move past her.  Walking almost casually through the carnage, Rey followed at his heels, her eyes on the Tuk’ata nearest to them and her lightsaber ready.

“Ren, STOP!” ordered Phasma.

Rey turned to see the Captain had levelled the blaster directly at her.

“That would be unwise, Phasma,” Kylo said calmly.

“If you resist, I am ordered to kill the girl,” she shouted.

“You can try, I suppose, but you won’t succeed,” he assured her.

The first beast rolled past them, hitting the rock face of the wall, so hard the ground beneath them shook a little. It appeared to be dead.  From the open doorway of a nearby tomb, another emerged, and raced toward Phasma.

As she turned to face it, firing her blaster repeatedly at its advancing form, he smirked and moved on.

“Stop Them!” yelled Phasma.  “Kill the girl!”

With a swipe of its paw, the Tuk’ata knocked her off her feet and sent her crashing against the transporter ramp.

Her order had immediate effect.  Several of the troopers turned from firing at the beasts and began to advance toward her. Rey swung her blade in a rapid arc, defending herself from the onslaught of laser blasts.

Kylo Ren outstretched his arm, and the nearest trooper crumbled and fell to the ground while several others froze, dropping their blasters.  A Tuk’ata raced through the frozen soldiers, ripping them apart with claws and teeth.

“Go,” he ordered.  “I’ll follow.”

Rey hurried on.  Almost to the door of the tomb, she stopped.  More ships were coming, she could hear their approach.  When she recognized them, a scream of relief escaped her lips.

These were X-wing fighters!  These were Resistance pilots!

She shouted again, waving her arms wildly above her head, and in her excitement did not hear Kylo shout her name.  Her breath gave out as his shoulder hit her chest and his arms wrapped around her waist.  He tackled her, and together they crashed to the ground inside the entryway of the tomb.

He was on his feet first, and seizing her by the shoulder he dragged her fully inside.

“Stop!  STOP!” she cried, struggling against him.  “They’re here!  They can help, they can—“

His hand shot out and when he clenched it in a tight fist, the ground shook, and an avalanche of rock rumbled down, pouring over the door until they were effectively walled in.  With the red glow of his saber the only light in the dark, Rey glared up at him, coughing on the rock dust.

“They will help.  As a distraction,” he agreed.

 

 

 


	21. The Tomb

The falling rock and sand filled the dark chamber with heavy dust that stung Rey’s eyes and forced her to cough every time she opened her mouth to berate him.

Kylo took no notice of her and instead seemed to frantically be searching for something.  He waved his flickering saber back and forth in long arcs, briefly illuminating stone walls marked with deeply cut symbols and an uneven floor of hard-packed dirt.

“What… are you… doing?!” she demanded, finally able to gasp the words.

“Light,” he growled.  “We don’t have much time.”

Rey froze, holding her breath.  She could hear her own heart, beating fast and hard, and the faint sound of an occasional loose pebble skittering down the slope of fallen earth—and though she couldn’t actually hear the sound of something approaching, she could feel it.  Something big… something hungry and ancient.

She was on her feet immediately.  Whatever inhabited the tomb lived in the dark.  It would have no trouble finding them to attack.  They were at a disadvantage without light.

Rey saw it before her frantic companion.  By the light of his blade she saw the shadows bend at an odd angle near the ceiling of the room, and realized that there was a ledge running the length of the wall.  Her eyes followed it to the end where it bent to follow the passage into the darkness beyond the entry chamber. Against the wall beneath the ledge, a row of tall, sealed jars caught her eye.  Rey had seen jars like these before. Quickly, she leapt up and caught the ledge, confirming that it was shaped like a trough.  Dropping back to the floor, she smelled the tips of her fingers, and smirked.

“Over here,” she called.

As he turned, she lit her blade and touched the tip of her light saber to the trough.  Instantly flames leapt from the trough and raced down the wall and into the passageway beyond them.

“Light,” she snapped.

His dark eyes moved from the flames to her face and she could see in them the reflection of fire.  She scowled and looked away from his intense gaze.

“Clever little Rey,” he murmured.

“What is it that’s coming?” she demanded.  “I can feel it.  It’s big, isn’t it?”

“Terentatek.  They guard the tombs and caves throughout this valley— they are powerful creatures, force-sensitive predators bred by the Sith lords of old.  Avoid the tusks and claws at all cost, they’re extremely venomous.”

Rey took a deep breath and glanced again at the slope of earth which buried the door.  If she attempted to blast it clear with the Force, it might only cause further rockslides, burying them deeper.  There would not be time to dig out, though part of her was demanding she try.  Her friends were out there, fighting the First Order.  Perhaps one of those pilots had even been Poe—

“Focus!” Kylo Ren hissed, abruptly turning away from her to face the passage.

“You need my help,” she realized, noting the tensing of his shoulders at her words.  “This isn’t about training at all.  Whatever you’re trying to get from this tomb, you can’t do it alone.”

When he didn’t answer, she nodded to herself.

“I’ll help you,” she said.

At this, he turned and his eyes found hers, and for a moment as she gazed into them, she saw the boy from her dreams again.  His eyes were large and deep, and though his brow furrowed in an expression of pain, she thought she saw something a little like hope in them.  How long had it been since someone had willingly offered him anything?  Rey almost felt churlish for the words she knew she would say next.

“But once we find what it is you’re looking for, our agreement is over.  I will no longer be your apprentice.  I will be free to return to Master Luke.”

A thundercloud of rage crossed his face and his hand tightened around the hilt of his light saber.  He opened his mouth and a loud roar echoed through the chamber-- so loud that it set her ears ringing and the flames leapt and danced wildly in its wake.

Confused, she stared at him.  Wondering how such a sound could have—

He whirled, raising his flickering blade, and she saw it charging toward them… the terentatek.

The beast was massive, lumbering quickly on two feet, with a head that was almost too large for its body, crowned as it was with long, thick, spines.  It had a wide mouth, with sharp tusks that grew out from the corners, and when it opened its mouth to roar again, Rey saw row after row of razor-sharp teeth.

Kylo crouched and struck out with his blade as he dove out of the way. The saber cut the creature across its legs, yet it barely stumbled as it spun to chase after him.  Without hesitation, Rey leapt forward and landed a second blow against its back.  The terentatek reared back, snarling.  Horrified, Rey noticed that the blow she had landed had only managed to slightly scorch the creature’s thick skin.

It turned and came for her, swinging one heavy, clawed fist with a speed that belied its clumsy gait.  She only managed to dodge it, by rolling to the side.  Before she could get to her feet, it charged at her, but reared back again as a flicker of red slashed at it from behind.  As it turned, Rey managed to scramble to her feet, leap forward and bring down her blade against its shoulder.

The terentatek roared again, taking another swing.  This time it caught her fully, sending her crashing against the wall.

Rey heard Kylo shout, drawing the beast’s attention away from her.  He was backing into the corridor beyond the entry chamber and the beast was following.  The terentatek’s movements would be hindered in the narrow passageway due to its mammoth size, but so too would Kylo’s.  He would have far less room to dodge out of the way.

Rey rocked to her knees, and rubbed her forehead.  She was dizzy, and her entire body hurt, but she had to think of something, fast!  The beast’s hide was so thick that their lightsabers were barely drawing blood, but it had to have a weakness, everything had a weakness.

The beast roared again, and beyond it, she could just make out the red glow of Kylo’s lightsaber flashing quickly, as he swung.

Gripping one of the tall jars that lined the wall, Rey used it to steady herself as she stood.

And then it hit her—

She focused, pulling in her fear of the beast, and her rage at being confined in a tomb while her friends fought outside, and hefted two of the tall, sealed jars into the air.  With all her strength she force –threw the jars into the passageway.  The jars smashed against the beast’s shoulders and head, drenching the creature in a black, pitch-like substance.

As though he could read her mind, Kylo dove to the side of the terentatek, striking its shoulder with his light-saber.  The pitch immediately caught fire, which raced across the beast’s back and head, engulfing it in flames.

The beast let out a piercing, shrieking howl as Kylo struck again.  Rey was at his side in an instant, her blade ready as the creature turned.

“The neck!” Kylo shouted.

Both struck the flaming beast at the same time, Rey cutting across its neck while Kylo drove his blade through its jaw.  Black blood spurted from its wounds as it collapsed to its knees with a last shrieking cry, and then, fell forward.  The ground beneath their feet shook when it hit.  Though it still burned, the beast was dead.

Rey staggered backwards, breathing heavy.  Her head still hurt from where it had struck the wall, and she felt drained. Kylo nodded his head once, before holstering his light saber, grabbing a torch from the wall and lighting it from the beast’s corpse.

“Come on,” he ordered.

“Are there more of those?” Rey panted, stumbling after him.

“Very likely,” he agreed.

“Great,” she muttered.

After a few minutes, the passage ended at a large, arching, open doorway.  The light from the passage did not extend beyond the threshold.  Kylo paused a moment, and then took a few cautious steps, holding his torch aloft.  Rey could hear the sound of running water.  Their footsteps echoed in a way which suggested that the new chamber was large with very high ceilings.

“There,” Rey whispered.

The torchlight had fallen on an irregularity in the stone wall.  He saw where she pointed, and when he touched the flame to it, fire raced across the wall, following another trough.

The chamber’s ceiling arched high overhead, and a pair of tall, needle-like obelisks framed another doorway at the far end of the chamber.  A statue of a giant, seated, human-like figured glared down at them from beneath its stone hood, and, perhaps strangest of all, the room was bisected by a quickly flowing stream, which flowed down the wall on one side, rushed through a trench in the floor, and then disappeared into a large grate in the opposite wall.

“I suppose that’s Naga Sadow,” she guessed, glancing up at the stern, hooded, stone face.

“Perhaps,” Kylo shrugged.  He did not seem to be interested in Sadow’s likeness, and instead surveyed the room with a pronounced frown, as though it held some sort of puzzle to be solved.

“Are we looking for something?” she pressed.

“Mmmm,” he agreed.

“Is that something the secrets of the Dark Moon?” she guessed.

“No,” he replied shortly.

“How am I supposed to help if I don’t even know what—“

“The dark moon is a ship.  It once belonged to Naga Sadow.”

“That would be a very old ship,” Rey remarked, glancing around the chamber.

Kylo let out his breath in a long frustrated sigh.

“You don’t understand.  It isn’t a ship in the traditional sense.  Not like the Falcon, anyhow.”

“Bigger?” she guessed.

“No.  Smaller.  Much smaller.”

“How small?”

“Have you ever seen one of the old TIE fighters?”

No!” Rey scoffed.  For she had seen one what was left of one of the planets which had fallen under the Dark Moon’s shadow.  There was no possible way that a ship which was only big enough to carry one person could ever cause such devastation.  “Not possible.”

“It is.  During the Great Hyperspace War, Sadow’s ship was infamous.  He barely needed his army.  He destroyed everything in his path—“

“How?” she demanded.

“Do you remember the meditation chamber on Baudere?”

Rey felt her face grow hot.

“Yes,” she hissed.

“Sadow’s ship was a meditation sphere with both living and mechanical parts.  From his ship, he would perform his battle meditation which would cause mass hallucination and hysteria.  Armies would turn on themselves and attack each other.  The Dark Force was especially powerful in him.”

Rey drew in a quick breath at how simply the mystery which had driven both her and Master Luke from planet to planet was solved.

“And now the First Order has it?” she guessed.

He did not answer.

“And you want to know… what?  How it works?  Perhaps how you could use it yourself?” she guessed.

“I want to know….whatever there is to know about it,” he muttered, studying the river now, he seemed to have lost interest in the conversation.

“And you think this Naga Sadow was buried with its secrets.  Very well… then I suppose we’re looking for a coffin or a sarcophagus of some sort—“

“Not at all. Sadow was never entombed here.  He died in exile on Yavin 4.”

“Then who is buried here?” she wondered.

“No one.  The tomb was used as a storehouse for many things.  Old star maps, ancient droids… other treasures long since looted.  For many years, due to the fact that it was infested with terentateks, it was used as a sort of proving ground for the students at the Sith Academy.  At any rate, we are not looking for a body here.”

“If it’s already been looted the how—“

“There,” he said and crossed quickly to the side of the room where the stream flowed out through a grate in the wall.  He waved his torch in front of them, and Rey could see that the stream continued past the grate and through a tunnel.

“You want to go in there?” she asked.

“Don’t you feel it?” he asked.

Rey paused and closed her eyes, listening, reaching out with the force.  The only thing she felt was the throbbing in the back of her head.

“Nothing,” she confirmed.

“It’s there,” he whispered.  It’s faint, but it’s there.”

“I suppose you mean that we’re to go crawling through this tunnel,” she sighed.

Rey lit her saber, intending to cut through the grating and made to step down into the stream, but was snatched back so abruptly that she let out a little shriek. The torch clattered to the floor, burning at their feet.

Kylo held her firmly, pressed against himself so tightly that she almost couldn’t breathe.  She looked up to see his eyes wide and horrified.

“It’s Maccawater—not water at all, but an acid that will eat through flesh in less than a second,” he murmured.

“You… you… c-could have told me that before I…”

He was still holding her, and was staring down at her now with a ferocity and a hunger that made her stomach contract into a tight knot.  She swallowed once, hard.

“You… you can let go.  I won’t go jumping in or anything,” she mumbled.

The corner of his mouth twisted up into a smirk that had become very familiar to her.

“And if I don’t?” he taunted.

“Then I suppose we’ll make an easy meal for the next terentatek that wanders in,” she replied cooly, though with his abilities, he could surely sense the effect that his proximity was having on her.

He dropped her immediately and turned his attention to the far side of the room.

“I have an idea,” he said, striding away from her.  “Clear out that grate, but keep your feet dry.”

Ignoring him, and giving her head a little shake to clear it, she moved closer to the tunnel entrance, kneeling down at the edge of the stream with her blade lit.  She was able to carve through the grate on the side closest to her, and even halfway across the top, but she couldn’t reach the other side, nor the bottom which was submerged in the maccawater.

Rey set her blade aside and took a deep breath.  Drawing in the energy around her was more difficult this time, like trying to suck thick mud through a tiny straw.  She thought of the way he had looked at her while they were lying in bed on the island—how he had taunted her for wanting more than just sex to fill a need.  Which was undoubtedly why he blew so hot and cold, wanting her for a moment, and then immediately returning to his cold  and callous ways.

The grate shook perceptibly.  She grit her teeth and focused harder, and with the groan of bending metal, the grate broke free and splashed backwards into the quickly flowing stream, born away into the tunnel.

From the other side of the room came a resounding smash which shook the floor.  Rey gasped, suspecting another monster, but instead looked up to see that Kylo had cut through the base of one of the obelisks and felled it to the ground.

Before she could ask if he was trying to alert every Terentatek in the tomb to their presence, she saw the great, needle-like pillar, lifted into the air and floated gently toward her.

“Stand back,” he ordered.

As soon as she leapt back, the obelisk splashed down into the stream, and Kylo jumped onto it.  He extended a hand to her, which she caught, and he yanked her up beside him as the stone floated down toward the tunnel.  Quickly, they both threw themselves flat on the stone, giving them just enough clearance as they passed through the gaping hole where the grate had been and on into the tunnel.

In the sudden dark, with her cheek pressed against cold stone, and the deadly water lapping beneath her, Rey shuddered.  He had, of course, forgotten to bring the torch.

 

 

 


	22. The Cave

For a girl who had grown up between a bright, open sky, and the seemingly endless sands of the desert, the tunnel was a torture.  If she tried to sit up, she would smash her head.  In fact, if she moved too much at all, she might lose her balance, fall into the quickly flowing maccawater beneath them, and be disintegrated within seconds.  The darkness offered no comfort either.  After her confinement on Baudere, Rey had had enough of the dark to last a lifetime.

“Does this tunnel never end?!” she snapped.  Her voice rang too loudly in the confined space, and she could hear the warning note of panic in it, the sound of it made her flinch.

“It ends,” he confirmed, his voice calm and quiet.

“How do you know it doesn’t end at the edge of a drop-off?  How do you know we won’t fall over the side and be melted? She demanded, nevertheless, lowering her voice to match his calm tones.

“I suppose I don’t know that,” he admitted, and even in the darkness, she knew he was smiling that lopsided smirk, she could hear it in his voice.

“Funny!” she hissed, her anger growing almost as large as her fear.  She had to calm down. Master Luke never lost his temper, no matter the circumstances.  He always had control over his emotions, even when it seemed like they were facing certain doom.

“That’s not true,” Kylo replied as though she had spoken the thought aloud.

“Stop. Get out of my head!” she growled.

“We’re not going to be pitched over the side of any waterfall,” he continued.  “We’re slowing down.  Can’t you feel it?”

And immediately she knew that he was right, the feeling of movement was slower, the water lapping at the sides of the stone, much gentler.

“We’re getting closer to it.  I can hear it,” he soothed.

“I… I don’t like tight spaces,” she admitted.  “Not for very long anyway.”

“You were a scavenger for most of your life.  Didn’t that involve—“

“Yeah.  Yes it did… sometimes.  There was an old Star Destroyer in the graveyard back on Jakku—I think it was called the Inflictor.  Everyone stayed away from it, for the most part.  I heard stories about squatters living in the ship’s conning towers.  They were supposed to be dangerous, real territorial types, but I was quick.  I knew my work well.  I figured I could be in and out before they even knew I was there.  I was repelling down a corridor when my rope was cut.  I fell about 15 feet, broke my arm, cut my leg up pretty bad, but I was able to get away.  I spent the next few days hiding in a ventilation shaft.  Very little water… extremely dark… and I could hear them all the time, looking for me.  Haven’t liked tight spaces much since then.”

He did not respond and an irrational panic seized her—that she was alone in the dark, trapped and alone, and she would die here and no one would ever know.

She froze as his gloved hand brushed again the exposed skin of her leg.  He was, perhaps, only changing his grip on the stone, but the way he had positioned his hand, so that she could just feel the side of it touching her leg, seemed deliberate, and she was thankful for it.  The slight pressure served to anchor her, and she no longer felt quite so alone.

And yet his continued silence bothered her.  They were never equals—captor and captive, master and apprentice-- he always held the power over her.  This dynamic often led her to feel angry with herself— especially whenever she opened to him in some small way and left herself vulnerable.

“Now you say something about yourself, something I don’t know,” she said.  “That’s how conversations work.”

“I have shown you many of my memories already,” he reminded her.

“That’s different.  That’s not conversation, that’s—that’s like taking someone hostage and showing them things whether they want to see them or not.”

He was quiet for a moment more.  She had almost given up hope of an answer when he spoke again.

“You frustrate me,” he admitted simply.

“I already know that,” Rey sighed.

“You’re powerful.  You could be more powerful still if you would only embrace the dark side.  It was my goal to break you the way I was broken, to force you into realizing your abilities, as I have—“

“And you’re frustrated because I won’t break,” she guessed.

“No Rey.  If I wanted to break you, though you are strong, I would break you.  It would, perhaps, take physical torture to do so, but it could be done.  When I am not directly confronted with you, I tell myself that I will do it.  That it is imperative that I do so, and yet when I inflict the pain I know is necessary upon you…”

His words trailed off.  Against her leg, she felt his hand curl into a fist.  Though he did not complete the sentence, she knew what he was going to say.  She could feel him thinking it.  When he inflicted pain on her, it felt as though he were inflicting it upon himself.

It surprised her.  Although, searching through her memories, she realized that perhaps it shouldn’t.  Perhaps she had always suspected as much.

“Some nights… I still can’t sleep,” she admitted.   “Some nights, I imagine my mother coming back to Jakku, and I’m not there.  But I know that it won’t happen.  Deep down, I guess I’ve known for a long time.  She’s dead.  Master Luke says that a Jedi shouldn’t have strong attachments to individuals anyways, that we can’t see the greater good if we focus too much on the good of those we love best.”

“No matter which Force you serve, they both require their acolytes to sacrifice,” he said in a low voice.

“The rewards are different though,” she said confidently.

“Not always.”

“People turn to the dark side because they want power, and they don’t care what they have to do to get it!”

“My grandfather embraced the dark side in order to save the one he loved.”

“Master Luke’s mother died when he was born.  Darth Vader spent the next twenty years as an evil, twisted, murdering—“

“You don’t know the first thing about my grandfather,” he hissed, his tone becoming dangerously sharp.  He moved his hand away from her leg.

“I know that he destroyed General Organa’s entire planet in front of her.  I know that to this day, she carries that wound on her heart.”

“He had tried the way of the Jedi and the Republic.  He saw corrupt politicians sway the senate.  He saw how the greed of a few took precedence over the good of the many, while the Jedi were used as a tool to prop them up.  No one would listen.  His master betrayed him.  When he lost his wife, he finally realized how much of his life he had wasted in futility.  He saw that the only thing that could destroy evil was evil.  He spent 20 years building an empire where all living being would exist under the same laws.  He used his power to destroy the corrupt system of entitlements and lies that politicians had built.  He bid his time, playing the obedient apprentice to his master, Palpatine, using his master’s knowledge and experience to bring planet after planet under the Empire’s peace, but knowing that ultimately, he would one day be strong enough to destroy the most corrupt politician of all, the Emperor.  Did Luke never tell you what my grandfather offered him?  To destroy the Emperor and rule the galaxy together? No.  Because Luke Skywalker was brainwashed to believe the lies of the Ben Kenobi.  He could only see the world as dark or light.  He is brainwashed still.”

“He is a good man!” Rey cut him off.

“He is a coward!” Kylo seethed, raising his voice at last.  Rey cringed as his words echoed loudly through the tunnel.  The stone pillar rocked nauseatingly from his restless movements.

“He is a coward,” Kylo repeated, his voice calm again.  “A coward who hides.  His father gave his life to destroy the greatest source of evil in the galaxy, and it almost worked!  Do you really believe that after twenty years of planning, and working, hiding his true intentions from a master who could read his every thought—a master who knew too well the Sith rule of two, and constantly expected that Vader would one day attempt to kill him—do you really believe that Darth Vader was broken at the sight of a son he had never known being tortured?  That his core beliefs and life goals were abandoned in an instant?  Or can you understand that he saw Palpatine distracted, sloppy in his madness, his energy draining from shooting bolt after bolt of force lightening, and he realized the chance to finally realize his ultimate goal had come?”

Rey closed her eyes—a useless reaction in the dark, she realized, but her head hurt from all the things she wanted to say, all the arguments she wanted to make.  But one thing above all others stood out to her.

“Almost,” she murmured.  “You said almost.”

He gave no answer to this.

She sighed.  With her eyes closed, he was the first to see it.

“Light,” he whispered.

Rey opened her eyes and blinked.  Lifting her head slightly to see better, she squinted.

There was something up ahead.  A scattering of faint, blue, pinpoints of light.  They flickered slightly like dim starts, and seemed to be concentrated in the shape of a half circle.  It took her a few moments to realize that the glowing half-circle was the end of the tunnel.

“What is it?” she whispered.

“I… I’m not sure,” he admitted.

The pillar moved slowly, drifting now instead of rushing, but the half-circle of faint, twinkling, lights grew larger and larger until at last they passed out of the mouth of the tunnel and into the largest cave Rey had ever seen.

Massive, icicle-shaped rock formations hung down from the ceiling, their pointed tips dangling threateningly over their heads, while other pointed rock formations grew up from the bottom of the black lake, narrowing to sharp points high above.  They gave the cave the appearance of a yawning mouth filled with dangerous fangs.  The sparkling blue lights seemed to cover everything.

Carefully, Rey got to her knees, and then, extending her arms for balance she slowly got to her fees.  Kylo copied her movements.

“There,” he said, and she saw a glowing finger of earth which jutted out into the inky blackness of the lake.  Rey leaned forward, stretching her arm towards the nearest pillar of glowing rock.  When they finally drifted close enough, she shoved off, hard, sending the floating pillar toward the glowing shore.

The floated silently together, waiting to reach the shore, both of them staring around at the glowing blue cavern, at the shimmering rock formations, and the faint reflection of the twinkling, blue lights across the calm, black surface of the lake.

“It’s odd isn’t it?” she asked.

“Not the word I would have chosen,” he replied.

“Well it is.  Korriban is a planet that seems to breathe death and evil, everything that tries to exist here is ugly… twisted somehow… I would never have expected to find something beautiful in a place like this.

She turned to see his expression, but discerned nothing from his profile.  He seemed to be focused on the shore.

He jumped first, and tuned to offer his hand.  She took it and allowed him to help her to the shore.  It felt good to have her feet on something that didn’t move.  He did not release her hand, but instead lifted it closer to his face, turning it over so that her palm was open to him.

She drew in her breath sharply.  Her hand, was glowing blue where she had touched the rock to push off.  She leaned in to study it closer, just as he glanced up.  Their eyes connected.  His face, bathed in the dim glow of her hand, looked serene and sort of… sort of… the corners of his lips turned up in the faintest hint of a real smile.  Tiny sparks of blue reflected in his dark eyes.

He leaned forward first.  She knew what he meant to do, and closed her eyes.  She could feel the heat of his breath against her lips, and hear the rustling of—

His grip around her wrist tightened.

Rey’s eyes opened.

“What…?”

“Shyracks,” he whispered.  “I had forgotten.”

“I don’t understand!”

“Keep your voice down, and don’t move until I say.  They’re blind.  They’re cave dwellers.  The blue… I didn’t realize their waste was luminescent.”

“What?!” she hissed, snatching her hand back to wipe it hastily against her shift.

“They come out of the caves every six years, a migratory or mating pattern, I can’t remember which, but in the old days, people would come from all over the galaxy to see them.  There would be so many, the skies would turn black for days on end.  They were famous for the blue waste they left across the red deserts of Korriban.  They called it the ‘purpling’ of Korriban.”

“Well that’s… that’s…” she fumbled for the words to voice her disgust, but the sound of rustling wings was growing louder.

“Don’t move,” he reminded her.

Rey’s eyes darted back and forth, searching frantically for the source of the sound, but when the first shyracks swooped down from the ceiling, skimming across the water toward them, she had to press her lips together not to shriek in horror.

These were nightmare creature.  Their skin was pale, wrinkled and corpse like, and they were shaped like something between a human and a worm, with bony wings.  They had no eyes, only gaping, hole-like mouths with no lips, and needle-sharp teeth.  Their shrieks were ear-piercing.

“Don’t move,” he mouthed the words again.

The first shyracks shot by within inches of them.

He leaned forward slowly, until his lips were beside her ear.

“There’s a fissure in the rock, twenty steps behind you.  There’s a current—warm air, coming from it.  We should be able to just squeeze through.  When I say run…”

The shyracks continued to swarm past them, Rey cringing when a sharp-edged wing grazed across her back.

“Steady,” he whispered.

The last cluster shot past them, the sound of wings fading in the distance.

“Go,” he hissed.

Rey pivoted, and ran.  She did saw the fissure, but almost immediately, heard again the sound of wings.  The swarm was circling back.

“Faster,” he urged.

Rey reached the rock wall, turned to her side and began to push herself through the crevice in the wall.  She had to hold her breath and wriggle hard, and realized almost immediately that she would just be able to squeeze through, but Kylo was too large to pass.

“It isn’t large enough!” she yelled, igniting her light saber.  She began swinging wildly at the crevice.

Beside her, Kylo lit his blade and held his other hand out in front of him.  The lead shyrack crumpled, fell from the air and crashed to the ground, dead.  The creatures would be upon them in a second, and all her effort was doing little to widen the passage.

He swung, severing a wing and then spinning back to slice the head off another.  Rey gave up and turned to face the swarm.  She swung and swung again, but it was obvious that their numbers were too great.

“GO!” he ordered. “GO NOW!”

“No!  NO!” she yelled, felling yet another of the endless swarm.  A sharp-taloned claw snatched at her arm, and though she jerked it away and ducked, she was still cut deeply across her shoulder and back.

Kylo glanced quickly at her, baring his teeth, he cut wildly through several more of the flying terrors and then in one forceful movement, snatched her by her uninjured shoulder, and shoved her hard into the passage, backing against it so that she could not get out.

She screamed a curse word at him.  Beyond his dark form she could see wings flapping and the flickering of his blade arcing quickly back and forth.  She would not go!  She would not squeeze through, deeper into this cave of horrors and completely alone while he was torn to shreds by shrieking monsters.

She could feel herself drawing in the dark energy before she was even conscious that she was trying.  She felt it filling her, her power steadily growing.  Her fear, trapped and alone, fueled the need for more.  She had never drawn in so much before.  She could no longer even feel the pain in her back and shoulder.

With a scream of rage, she let it out, unfocused, a dark wave of raw power.

The cave reverberated with her scream, and then it shook harder, rock crumbling from the walls and ceiling, massive stalactites crashing to the ground.  Falling rock crushed shyrack after shyrack, while rocks and dust rained down around her.  She no longer had to hold her breath, the crack had widened, and Kylo was beside her now, shoving her through.

She fell to her knees as they passed through into…into…

There was real daylight in the strange chamber.  Cracks in the low ceiling allowed rays of warm, red daylight to shine down in spots, illuminating a black marble floor, covered with deep drifts of red sand.

Kylo fell to his knees beside her, breathing heavily.

“Beautiful… I thought it was beautiful… but it was monster droppings,” she said in a shaky voice, and let out a single, hard laugh.

He leaned over and brushed the hair which had fallen loose from her bun, from her face.  His hand cupped her cheek, turned her face so that she had to look at him, and what she saw in his eyes then made her catch her breath.

His eyes were wild.

“Do you see now?” he demanded.  “Do you understand what you were made for now, where you belong?”

“No,” she mumbled, turning her face away, ashamed… and confused.

He lurched forward, his hand wrapping around the back of her neck as he hungrily pressed his lips to hers.

She pushed away.

“No!” she repeated, forcefully.

He froze.

“What’s wrong, Kylo? I thought we both knew you could take whatever you wanted,” she said, her voice breaking.  “That’s a lie.  It was even back then, because what you want… from me?  That’s something that can only be given willingly.”

“And what is that you think I want from you?” he growled, low in his throat.  “You ridiculous, love-starved, scavenging, little orphan.  Do you think I want your heart?  Do you really believe that I place any value on sentiment?”

Rey looked directly into his eyes.

“Yes,” she said simply.

The sneer on his face wavered a fraction, and then melted away completely.  The two of them were left staring at one another.  He looked away first, his hair falling across his eyes.

“I don’t,” he said.

“You’re a liar.”

“No. Not a liar.  I don’t love anything.  What I love, I must destroy.  It is the price I have to pay.  One need alone drives me.  Every other thing that I touch turns to ashes.”

“That’s not true.”

His smile was bitter when he spoke.

“If nothing else I say is true, you should believe that much.”

“You can’t destroy me,” she shrugged.  “You can’t.  I’m stronger than you are.”

He stood, straightening his robe, but Rey got to her feet as well, refusing to let him ignore her.  She had underestimated the amount of energy she had released, and standing up so quickly caused the room to sway.

She stumbled drunkenly back, and he caught her by the shoulder, accidentally pressing his fingers hard into the deep scratch left by the shyrack.  She gasped in pain. He loosened his grip but continued to press against the wound.

“Stronger than I am,” he scoffed.  “You can never be as strong as I am as long as you hold onto wasteful emotions like trust and affection.”

“You’re… hurting… me,” she said, struggling to stay calm.

“Good.  Let go of what you don’t need.  Am I hurting you Rey?  Remember that.  Your heart isn’t needed, your power is.”

She slapped him, hard.

“Stop it!” she hissed.  “Stop your games, your lies.  Stop trying to hurt me when we both know—“

“You don’t _know_ anything,” he cut in.  “Do you not remember Baudere?  How did you feel about me there?”

“I hated you.  You held me against my will.  I despised you.”

“Now who’s the liar?” he taunted, his lip quirking up into that knowing smirk.  “I know what you thought about me.  I could read every thought in your head whenever I chose to.  What I’m asking…” he bent down, bringing his lips to her ear and dropping his voice to a whisper.  “What I’m asking, is how did you _feel_?”

The implication of what he meant sent a shiver down her spine.  She knew.  She remembered.  The times she had woken, and immediately listened for the beating sound of his presence… wanting to see him… wanting him close, even when she wanted to kill him.  She remembered wanting him to touch her, wanting him to look at her, wanting _him_ , and constantly having to fight herself.  The struggle between her mind and body.

“That’s right, Rey.  You remember.  Do you know what I noticed first about you on Takodona?  Your health.  Growing up on Jakku, malnourished in that harsh of a climate-- under those circumstances, your body should have shown the wear.  Your heart should have been bitter, your eyes dull, but no.  There you were, practically glowing with life and hope.  I guessed what had sustained you through all those years even then.  The nutrients you didn’t get from food, the love you didn’t receive from family, all the things you needed to grow, you took in from the light side of the Force, without ever even realizing it.  Your body used it for nourishment.  When I brought you to Baudere, cutting you off from the Force your body had always depended on, I knew you would seek another source of energy to draw from.  The only power your body could draw from there in that place—my own dark energy.”

She shook her head slightly.

“Yes, Rey.  You are a Force Reaper.  When you can’t get one type of energy, you take in the other.  Your body needed mine.  You fought it admirably enough, but as your physical need began to conquer your mental resistance, you looked for a way to justify it— trying to make an emotional connection that would, to you, rationalize your physical need.  You made yourself needlessly vulnerable to me.”

She shook her head more forcefully.

“Yes, Rey.  Do you understand now?  Even the Jedi know that love is nothing more than a distraction, an irrational justification for valuing an addiction that will only serve to weaken you.”

Rey sucked in a sharp breath.

“In the cave just now…” she said.  “In the cave just now, you had no way out.  Your only chance at survival would have been for us to fight through those monsters together, but that’s not the choice you made!  You made the choice to sacrifice yourself to save—“

“I had no intention of dying back there!” he snapped.

“Oh, Kylo,” she whispered.  “I do understand… better than you think.  You poor—“

He snatched her injured shoulder and gave her a hard shake which stopped her words with a gasp of pain.  She brought her hand up to slap him again, but he caught her wrist with his other hand and twisted her arm up and over her head.  She struggled, trying to free herself as he backed her against the wall, and pinned her body between it and his own.

Unable to move, breathing heavily, she looked up to meet his eyes.

“Nothing you’ve said changes anything.  You still can’t take what you want from me, but you’ve also done everything you can to convince yourself that I can’t even give it to you.  I feel sorry for you.  You’ve been so twisted by—“

A searing pain behind her eyes stopped her words this time.  It hurt terribly, causing her to cry out as he delved roughly into her mind.  She pushed back, fighting him mentally, and just as before, she found herself spearing the foremost thing in his mind—fear.  It was always fear.  His fear… of the pull he felt to the light. A pull that seemed to grow stronger every time he admitted what he really felt for that girl—for her.

He knew that she saw it, his lips parted as though he would say something, but nothing came out.  There was nothing he could say. Rey pushed herself up on her toes, and kissed him.  He jerked back as though he had been burned.

“No,” he whispered, releasing her arm.

“No?” she asked, pushing her body against his.

He did not answer, but neither did he pull away this time. Boldly, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips lightly to his.  He did not return her kiss.

“Alright,” she whispered. “Alright, Kylo.”

She let go of him and with a sigh, turned to survey the chamber they found themselves in.

“I suppose we should try to—”

His arms were around her, squeezing her against himself, and then his mouth was on hers, and then on her neck, and jaw, and ear, kissing her roughly, nipping her earlobe.  He had backed her against the wall again, pressing her body between himself and it.  She could feel what was straining against his robes, and worked her arm between their bodies, so that she could run her hand against it.  Even through the thick cloth of his tunic, it caused him to shudder, and he moaned low in his throat, his lips still pressed against her neck.  He broke away only to drop his belt and pull the tunic over his head.  When she didn’t move fast enough, he grabbed the hem of her tunic and ripped it up.  She put her arms up, allowing him to pull it over her head.

He drew back slightly, gazing at her naked body for a moment, and then reached out slowly to trail his fingers down her neck and across her collarbone.  The gentleness of his touch and the look in his eyes raised gooseflesh up and down her body, but it was only for a moment.  The next instant he seized her around the waist, lifting her up, and setting her back to the wall. She wrapped her legs around him, and felt him reach down and drop his pants.  He was exposed as she was, and she could feel the swollen head rubbing against her inner thigh, and she wanted… she wanted…

He kissed her again, roughly, pressing her back hard against the wall, and when she cried out, it wasn’t all from pleasure.  The wound on her shoulder throbbed painfully, but she almost forgot about it when she felt his hand slide behind her and down between her legs to touch the aching spot between them.  The wetness he found there made him groan, and he ran his long middle finger around her entrance tauntingly before sliding one finger slowly-- agonizingly slowly—into her.  Rey moved with his hand, moaning as she ground herself against his palm, wanting more, but he was in no hurry.  He gave her another finger, still stroking her slowly, not allowing her demanding thrusts against his hand to dictate his pace.

“Oh, please just… just…” she cried.

His tongue traced the down the length of her neck and then his lips pressed against the hollow at the base of it.

“Please what?” he murmured against her neck. “Tell me what you want, Rey.”

He withdrew his fingers and she almost cried out at the absence of them, but then felt the head of his cock press firmly against her opening.  She gasped in anticipation. He leaned away to adjust her position against the wall, accidentally dragging her injured shoulder against the rough stone and she flinched with the pain.

“Rey?” he asked, uncertain at her reaction.

“Just please...” she begged.

He pressed his lips against her neck again, and then, bit down as he entered her with one swift thrust.

She cried out, digging her nails into his back.  He pulled out slowly and then another thrust, fast and hard.  With each thrust he seemed to hit something deep inside of her that sent a jolt through her entire body—and then the slow withdraw, so that she felt every inch of him—the competing sensations had driven every thought from her head but one:

“Faster,” she begged.

He stopped completely, still fully inside of her and backed away from the wall.  She gasped and clung to his neck, and then they were down on the sand, and he was beneath her.  Straddling him, was a different sensation entirely, she lifted herself on her knees and then slowly eased down the length of his cock.  He moaned, and she felt a thrill at the control she had.  She moved faster now, up and down riding him, feeling herself tighten around his shaft as her orgasm built.  He was meeting every one of her thrusts with one of his own and every time she felt a jolt and another and another, faster and faster, she was almost there, she was almost—

“I’m… I’m…” she cried.

And he sat up, wrapping his arms around her tightly, and thrust hard into her.  She cried out and felt an explosion that seemed to race across her body, fading into a tingling in her toes.

He fell back on the sand panting, with her head on his chest, and his arms still wrapped tightly around her.  When she looked up, and saw his face, she knew that in that instant, for that one moment, he was completely at peace.  


	23. The Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know-- essence transfer seems like its really out there, doesn't it? It's canon, I swear. All the stuff Kylo says about the Emperor? That's what actually happened in the books. Ive had this theory since the first time I saw TFA, lol!

The room moved slowly up and down with the rise and fall of Kylo Ren’s chest.  Rey could hear the thudding of his heart against her ear, and the sound comforted her.  The weight of his arm across her back secured her.  She closed her eyes again, hoping to extend the moment.  If she could not see the chamber, perhaps she would not have to think of getting up and continuing on.  She could pretend that they were together somewhere else—that they were back on the island.  That they lived there.  That every morning she woke to the lull of waves, secure in warm arms that belonged to someone who loved her, who would never leave her.

Ridiculous fantasy, and even as she imagined it, she knew that it was and felt ashamed.  Somewhere on the surface, her friends fought what remained of the First Order troops, while the man who lay so still and silent beside her was determined to drag her along on a strange quest which he refused to disclose the full nature of.   What could any of them do but play their parts… and yet, if he asked her to leave… if he, in that exact moment, told her that they could leave together, abandon their parts… that they could live together on some small nameless planet in the uncharted beyond… she might say yes.  She might.

“Haven’t you guessed it yet?” he asked, his voice quiet.

“What?” she whispered, trailing her fingers lazily across his chest.

“What we’re doing here.  Can’t you feel it now that we’re so close?”

Rey’s hand stopped as she puzzled over his words.  Her fingers curled into a fist as she realized that he had pulled the accusation from her head.  The thought she had just had about a strange quest which he refused to disclose the nature of.  If he had seen that—

“Sssh,” he whispered, slowly stroking her back.  It was meant to soothe the admonishment she intended to give him, but the fact that it came a second before she had verbally spoken the words only served to frustrate her more.

And then it hit her.  The beating of his heart did not beat just in his chest but also seemed to come from the air around them.  The more she listened, however, the more she became aware that there were two distinct rhythms—the one against her ear, and the slower more sinister cadence of the outer pulse.

“What is that?” she hissed, tensing.

“It’s him.  The Supreme Leader.  He’s here… somewhat.”

Rey sucked in a sharp breath and made to sit up, but his arm tightened around her, confining her against him.

“Not in this room, Rey.  Not here at this very moment, but close.  Very close.”

“You’re taking me to Snoke?” She cried, her thoughts reeling as she recognized the trap she had allowed herself to be guided into.  “You said—you said… but the Dark Moon—“

“Yes.  He controls the Dark Moon from this place.”

“But it’s a ship.  It’s a ship that has wiped out whole populations.  How can he operate such a ship from—“

“The Dark Moon is an ancient sith battle meditaion sphere.  It is not a large ship, and can be controlled by only one force user—if that force user is a sith master.”

“And he hides it here?”

“No.  The Supreme leader and the Dark Moon are never in the same place at the same time.”

“I don’t understand!”

Kylo drew in a long breath and exhaled slowly before answering.

“Do you know that Master Luke is never truly alone?”

“He… well… what do you mean?  Do you mean the Force is—“

“No.  I mean that those who have passed before us… if they were masters of the Force they do not cease to be.  They may leave behind their bodies but their will their being… they become part—“

“Part of the force, yes.  I know that much.  You mean to say that he can feel them around him, that they support him,” she guessed.

“I mean to say that he can see them.  That he can speak with them.  That they appear to him in the forms they had when they walked beside him.”

Rey considered this.  She thought of all the times she had seen Master Luke standing apart… silent.  The slight nod of his head, as though he were deciding something.

“He can see and speak with the jedi of old?”

“Some of them, I suppose, yes, but it is not only the jedi of old who continue to speak to those who would listen.  The dark masters, the sith-- they continue on as well.  This place… the valley… no, this planet even.  It is a tomb where nothing truly sleeps.  The Emperor once told my grandfather that his own master, Darth Plagueis had spent years of his life studying the dark force on Korriban, and from it he had learned the secrets of life—and death.  Darth Plagueis was so powerful that he could stop those he loved from dying.”

“But not himself?” Rey asked.

“Not himself.  His apprentice—the Emperor, killed him in his sleep, but from him the Emperor gained a great deal of knowledge.  He claimed to have expanded on that knowledge.  He claimed that he would triumph where Darth Plagueis had failed.”

“But he didn’t,” Rey whispered.  “Darth Vadar killed him on-“

“Darth Vadar destroyed his physical form,” Kylo agreed slowly.

“What are you saying?” she asked, sitting up at last.  He allowed it, his arm sliding heavily from her back.

“The ancients taught that the core of this world was made of pure dark force, but it isn’t, not quite.  It is a physical substance, a hard black metal, and veins of it run through this planet.  The only place where it runs close enough to the surface to mine, is here in this valley of tombs.  It radiates power.  Perhaps its power comes from thousands of years of blood soaking into the ground, perhaps it was always there from the moment this world formed, but its power is so great that the dead of this valley do not sleep.  When Naga Sadow built the Dark Moon, he built it from this powerful metal.”

“The Emperor’s remains were obliterated when the second death star was destroyed,” Rey reminded him.

“And yet his power, his being… was not.  He did not lie to my grandfather about this at least.  He had found a way to overcome death.”

At this, Kylo sat up and reached for his tunic.  Following his example, Rey began to dress as well.

“What is it?” she asked, sensing a sudden feeling of unease from him.

“My master is always in my head.  I have spent years training my thoughts, using my pretend obedience as a shield to my true mind.  When I was weak I could use anger or blind rage to hide my thoughts.  I have never spoken them out loud.  He knows.  He knows now.”

A shiver ran down Rey’s back.

“What does he know?  Tell me.”

“The Emperor had a plan to overcome death.  He had procured a series of clone bodies kept in stasis tanks here on Korriban for the time that he would need them.  When his body was destroyed, he used a radical dark force power called essence transfer and awoke in a clone body.”

“No,” Rey shook her head.  “No.  That’s—that can’t be.  Luke would—he would know.. he—“

Kylo didn’t look at her, but reached for her hand, pulling her to her feet beside him.

“The clone bodies don’t last long—about a year at most.  Masters of the dark force, like the Emperor, take a lifetime to build their abilities, to grow more powerful.  Even then, the dark force is toxic to living cells and will destroy the body given enough time.  When that much dark power enters a clone body, it begins to decay immediately.”

Rey gasped.  The withered hand of the hologram she had seen in her dreams… Snoke—

“Supreme Leader Snoke… is Emperor Palpatine,” he confirmed.  “A weakened and fearful version of his old self, but even still—“

“And you mean to kill him?” she interrupted, hurrying to keep pace with his long strides as he crossed the chamber.  T

The wide hall beyond the room was darker.  Less light had managed to find its way through the cracks, though the ceilings and walls were a veritable maze of them.  The floor was littered with sand and debris.

“I mean for us to put an end to him.  Yes,” he agreed, igniting his blade.  The red glow of his light saber reflected dimly from the cracked stone walls, emitting enough light for them to pick their way through crumbled columns and fallen slabs of rock.

“What is this place?” she asked, trying to ignore the realization that the throbbing beat of Snoke’s force had increased—that the rhythm was faster and louder.

“This is what remains of the first Sith Temple, and it is ancient.  The second temple—the pyramid built just above where we are now has stood since before our histories were recorded.  It is a place of immense dark power.  It is the power in this temple which keeps him anchored to his weak clone body, allowing him to control the Dark Moon.  You once said that he kept me at a distance because he fears me.  You were correct.  He knows well the Sith law of two.  He almost met his end at the hands of his last apprentice.  My grandfather left him a broken spirit in a decaying body.  Make no mistake, he is powerful still—but not strong enough to rule alone.  He needed me.  Though he fears me, he needed me.”

“This has always been your plan.” She realized.  “Even from the beginning you—“

“Light is not a destructive force.  It acts to define the darkness.  In order to destroy evil… to devote yourself to revenge… to the death of—“

“You have to be dark,” she finished, and in her head she saw again the body of Han Solo falling from the walkway as Kylo Ren watched.

“There was no plan, just a barely formed idea.  Everything I learned of him, I had to learn in an off-hand manner.  A delivery of bacta to Korriban—discovered when I searched a cargo manifest for illegal goods.  A destroyed clone factory on an abandoned moon—its records destroyed by First Order troopers on Snoke’s orders—this I found while searching for the Resistance base.  It took years to learn what I needed in this fashion, with him always, ALWAYS in my head.  Even as careful as I was, he still suspected.  He always suspected.  I had to prove my allegiance over and over and even after I had learned all that I could, I still did not have the power to defeat him alone.  Here on Korriban, only a highly skilled dark force user would be able to find him.  To further protect himself he has worked ceaselessly to destroy all those who have any force abilities.

“Except you,” she added.

“And you—though I had to convince him that you had the ability to become far more powerful than I, and that you could be turned.  I knew that in his greed, he would allow you to live, hoping to make an even more powerful apprentice.

“To replace you?” she guessed.

“Yes,” he agreed.

He held out his arm and Rey came to an abrupt stop beside him.  They had reached an intersection of corridors and he paused, cocking his head to one side as he listened.

“This way,” he decided, leading them forward.

“How do you kill something that can survive without a body?” she wondered, reaching reflexively for he own lightsaber.

“Essence transfer is difficult and takes great preparation.  A being made only of spirit needs a physical point of attachment or it be claimed by the chaos.  I will fight him.  You will destroy the other clones—but understand this: the Supreme Leader’s body resides within a battle meditation chamber.  A chamber composed of the same metal from the same vein as the hull of the Dark Moon.  It allows him to control the ship, but it also amplifies his power.  As I’ve told you before, this substance is dark force made solid.  He will use it.  He will attack with lightening, and pain.”

“But he can’t attack both of us at the same time, can he?  What if we both try to destroy him first and then destroy the other bodies?” she asked.

“No.  Once you’ve destroyed the other bodies I need you to draw off his energy.  This is what I’ve trained you for.  Draw the power into yourself, just like the mediation chamber on Baudere-- but I will deal the killing blow.  It is my birthright.”

“But I…” Rey’s voice trailed off uncertainly.

“Don’t!” he hissed, turning to face her.  “Don’t tell me that you ‘can’t’.  Don’t tell me that you aren’t able to wield the dark forces.  Not right now.  We both know that isn’t true.  I have sacrificed everything for this one chance.  I have lived for this moment alone! You will do this.”

“I will try,” she agreed quietly.

He smiled, the lopsided smirk that almost hurt her with its comforting familiarity.

“Has Master Luke really never told you, ‘Do or do not—“

“I will do it,” she corrected.

Beside them, a torch flamed to life in its wall niche.  They barely had time to make eye contact before the next torch ignited in a quick burst of flame, and then, all down the walls on both sides, torch after torch flared up, lighting their path to a pair of closed doors.

“He’s waiting,” Kylo said, and his eyes had a crazed look to them as he turned to face their destination.

Rey swallowed hard.  The sick feeling in the pit of her stomach had returned.  Still, she pushed past him and strode toward the doorway with a bravado she certainly didn’t feel.  Igniting her blade, she stopped to glance back at him over her shoulder.

“Coming?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not much more to go and this arc will be complete :(


	24. The Chamber

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just going to leave this right here...

The metal felt cold beneath her splayed fingers as she pressed her hands against the door.  It also throbbed with a strange and raw dark energy.  Her stomach churned queasily as she glanced up at Kylo, who was focused only on the entry to Snoke’s chamber.

“Understand that once we pass through these doors, this will not be a straightforward fight.  Not at first.  He will know your thoughts… your darkest fears, and he will not hesitate to use them against you.  Believe your reasoning and not your eyes,” he warned.

The doors opened inward of their own will, and as Rey dropped her hand she found herself staring into the eyes of her master, Luke Skywalker.  Beside him, General Leia Organa stood with her hand on his shoulder.

“I… I wasn’t expecting that,” Rey stuttered.

“We’ve come to rescue you,” Master Luke said, stepping towards her.  “Rey, come away from him.  You know how dangerous he is.  He’s filled your head with lies in his attempts to turn you.”

“Is that the best you can do?” Kylo drawled in a bored voice.  He took a few leisurely steps forward.  General Organa raised her blaster and aimed it at him.

“Not another step, Ben.  I WILL shoot,” she warned.

“Then shoot,” he scoffed, and took another step.

“Stop!” Rey cried, seeing the general’s finger move nervously against the trigger.  “Everyone stop, please.”

“They aren’t real Rey.  They couldn’t be here, use your brain.  I’ve trained you for this—the resurrection fields, don’t you remember?” he reminded her.

Rey quickly looked the pair over.  They appeared solid, not a hint of a waver or flicker.  Their mannerisms—from the way they stood to the expressions on their faces—were entirely accurate.

“Rey please… I wanted to believe my son could be saved, that Ben could be brought back, but he can’t,” the general pleaded, though her eyes never left Kylo’s face.  “You still have a chance.  You can return from the dark side.  Come back to us… while you still can.”

Although her words, struck Rey hard, she did notice something off.  With the doors closed behind them, the chamber they had entered was completely dark.  In fact the only light seemed to come from a strange glow that only illuminated Master Luke and General Organa.  She could see nothing of their surroundings.  It made them appear as though they were actors on a stage.

Master Luke’s face became stern.

“If you will not return with us, then you leave me no choice, Rey.  Forgive me.”

He lit his light saber and took one menacing step towards her.  It was as far as he got.  Kylo swiveled.  His blade blazed to life as he moved and with one graceful swing, cut through Master Luke.  Rey shrieked as Master Luke burst into wisps of smoke, and with one last mournful glance at Kylo, so too did General Organa.

Beyond where they had stood, she could now see a faint glow of light and without a word, Kylo crossed the floor towards it.  Rey hurried to catch up.

“W-what was that?” she stammered.

“Nothing.  A trick.  The Supreme Leader’s chamber is a battle meditation sphere, built to mimic the Dark Moon.  It allows him to control the ship, but it also grants him the same abilities that the ship does.  If the power of the Dark Moon allows him to project mass hallucinations across entire planets, imagine how simple a task it is for him to conjure up a few dusty, old ghosts for us.”

Rey nodded.  She and Master Luke had seen the devastation left in the wake of the Dark Moon’s path.  Entire populations of dead on battle fields where there appeared no trace of an enemy.  They died killing themselves and each other.

“Can they hurt us—these apparitions?” she wondered.

“I don’t know, but they will certainly try and convince us to destroy each other,” he replied. “Which is why... we must master our fears.”

She had the distinct impression that his words were meant as a reprimand.  He certainly hadn’t shown any emotion before or after slicing through Master Luke.

They had not walked very long before they found themselves in another corridor— although this corridor seemed distinctly out of place in the ancient temple.  The ring of Kylo’s boots against the metal grating of the floor was familiar.  The walls were familiar… the slight taper to the ceiling…. even the supports… this was the corridor of a ship, and the farther they walked, the more certain she became.  Had they somehow left the planet, or were the remains of a ship buried deep within the ancient temple?  Yet how could that be possible?  Her best guess would place the corridor aboard one of the old Imperial-class star destroyers, which were fairly recent constructs compared to such an ancient temple.

She was quite sure now that it was a star destroyer, that if they kept moving in the same direction, they would, sooner or later, come to the ship’s hangar, and then it occurred to her, with a nervous tightening of her stomach, that not only was she certain of the ship’s make, she was becoming fairly certain of exactly which ship they were on.  Only… wasn’t the corridor too narrow?  Was it becoming more narrow as they walked?

“It’s a trap!” she gasped, snatching his elbow and forcing him to stop.  “This feels… all wrong, like we’re walking into a trap.”

“We were walking into a trap the moment we set foot on Korriban,” he reminded her.

“But this… this is wrong… it…”

“It isn’t real, Rey.  We’re not really in a ship.  We’re not in space.  It’s an illusion.”

She reached out and knocked against the wall, hard enough to hurt her knuckles.  The resulting bang echoed through the corridor.

“Feels real,” she murmured, rubbing her sore hand.

“You know this place,” he realized.

Before she could answer, the floor shuddered violently, as though the ship had come under heavy attack. The entire corridor lurched, tilting on an angle, throwing her against the wall.

She tried to push away, but could not.  The center of gravity had changed and she was stuck against the wall, which had now become the floor.  The walls were bending around her with loud, metallic shrieks, rivets popping from support beams like corks, and Rey screamed as well, instinctively throwing her arm over her face and curling into the fetal position.

And then she could hear only the sound of her own ragged breathing and the thudding of her rapidly beating heart in her ears.  Slowly she lowered her arm to see smooth, shiny metal a foot above her.  Beside her on either side was the same.  She was trapped!  Completely enclosed in some kind of metal coffin!

“KYLO!” she screamed, and began beating her fists on the ceiling.

“Here,” came the low growl of his voice.

Rey twisted, maneuvering her body so that she lay on her stomach.  She found herself face-to-face with the sole of Kylo Ren’s boot.

“We’re in an air shaft,” he calmly informed her.

“How… how did this—“

“I’ve told you, the Supreme Leader will see your fears, all of them.  This is not real.  The answer we need, is how did you get out of here the first time it happened to you?”

The first time it happened… Rey swallowed thickly.  She could already hear them.  Whispers of a language foreign to Jakku.  They were beneath her somewhere.  She knew what would come next, and cringed before she even heard it.  The tapping of a stick on the ceiling below.  They knew she had taken to the air vents, and methodically, they were trying to find her.

“Rey, how did you escape the first—“

“Go!” she hissed.  “Crawl!  Move now, GO!”

His boot disappeared as he moved forward, and Rey crawled after him.  They were moving, but so was the tapping sound of the stick.  It wasn’t far behind them, and soon the hollow ring of an empty shaft would become a muted thud, giving away their position.

“Faster!” she hissed.  “Come on, faster, please!”

He stopped, and Rey was forced to stifle a shriek of fear and irritation.

“This is ridiculous.  We might crawl through this blasted shaft for eternity without any direction.  Try and remember now Rey, how did you escape?”

“GO, please!” she begged.

“Rey… it isn’t real.”

“I didn’t!” she cried.  “I didn’t escape.  They… they… caught me.  They beat me… tortured me… they…“

“Stop!” he ordered.

Though he needn’t have bothered.  Her voice had trailed off before he even spoke, but the memory of what happened played in her head, and surely, he saw it.  Rey closed her eyes reflexively,  as though it would stop her seeing it again.

“Afterwards… they dumped me just outside of Niima Outpost.  I suppose they thought I was dead.  They left me as a warning to others, not to set foot in their territory.”

There was no answer.  She opened her eyes to see that Kylo Ren, was gone.

“KYLO?” she screamed.

Beneath her, the stick tapped again and the sound of it was a muffled thud.  The air left her lungs.  She took several short panicky gasps, trying to draw in the oxygen she desperately needed but the air was gone.  She was suffocating.

And then, the place where Kylo had been only seconds before exploded in sparks and sprays of shrapnel.

Somehow, Rey found the air to scream.  Hands snatched her wrists and dragged her down, through the hole blown in the vent, the twisted metal ripping painfully against her arm and side.

She hit the ground hard, pain shooting through her and then felt a boot press against her cheek.  A man’s voice shouted harsh words at her in a foreign language.

“Please... please don’t,” she whimpered.  “Please don’t do this.”

Her vision blurred with unshed tears, but suddenly, behind the squatter, she saw a dark shadow move, and then, a brilliant flash of red light exploded from his stomach.  The squatter crumpled to the ground, and in the emptiness where he had stood over her, a bright blue sky flared into existence, causing her to cover her eyes.

She sat up quickly, wondering at how the metal flooring could have changed to grass without her noticing.  A gentle breeze stirred the hair which had strayed from her bun, tickling her cheek, and she could hear the rustling of leaves.  She knew where she was.  She knew, without turning around, that behind her would lay forests as far as the eye could see.  Before her, the same breeze raised tiny ripples across the mirror-like surface of the lake.  This was Takodana, and it was still beautiful.

Kylo Ren, in his black cowl and tunic stood in stark contrast to the blue sky behind him.  He too was watching the water as it lapped against the shore.

“I know this place,” she said, climbing to her feet, and swiping hastily at her eyes.  “Takodana, but why are we here?”

“A bad memory,” he murmured.

“Yours?”

“No.  Yours.  You were terrified of me that day.  You wished you could kill me.  I remember that.”

“But not anymore.  I’m not afraid of you anymore.  I don’t hate you.  Kylo I… I…” she stumbled.

He remained silent a moment, allowing her to fumble for the words and then gave a harsh laugh.

“You love me, Rey?” he finished, and shook his head.  “When will I ever be able to make you understand?  When will my words finally get through that thick, useless head of yours? I don’t want your heart.  I want your power.  I want your will to be the same as mine.  Love… is a useless and wasteful energy.  If I could cut your heart out and keep your power, I wouldn’t hesitate.”

“I don’t…I don’t understand.  Why are you talking this way?  You don’t mean—“

“Of course I do.  But of course I do!  I’ve told you this in so many words over and over again.  Do you think I saved you back there out of compassion—out of love?  Fool!  Until now, I thought I would have a use for you, but now… well, you have turned out to be a disappointment to me, Rey.  Such a great disappointment,” he sighed.

“What do you mean?  What’s wrong with you?”

Kylo’s lips quirked into a lopsided smile—though it was not a kind one.  His eyes were cold as he studied, her.

“Seeing you… the great hope of the resistance… laid low before some back-planet scum-squatter, whimpering, crying, BEGGING for your life.  I had not known how disgustingly pathetic you could be,” he said and gave another short hard laugh.  “You’ve turned out to be a waste of my time.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Oh but I do, girl.  You have no idea just how much effort I’ve invested in you—how hard I worked to keep you alive—especially when you seemed so keen to throw it all away over a stupid droid.  All those years on Jakku, I made sure you were hidden, made sure no one would ever be able to find you, and all it amounted to was this--- a pathetic, useless scavenger who can’t even defend herself from a commonplace scum-squatter.”

Even though his words stung and confused, her mind caught at the meaning behind them.

“What do you mean by ‘made sure no one would ever be able to find me’?” she demanded.  “What did you do?”

He smiled wider, clasping his hands behind his back.

“What do you think I mean?  Haven’t you guessed it yet?  The reason your mother never came back for you? I think you know.  You want so desperately to believe in all your foolish notions of love and redemption that you can’t even see what is staring you in the face.  I’ve already told you that I spared your life on Yavin Four when you were a child.  If saving your life was Ben Solo’s last act, then hiding you away was the first act of Kylo Ren.  Once your mother had delivered you to Jakku, I killed her.  She was a loose end, and I couldn’t take the risk of her breaking under torture if anyone were to come looking.  She was a link between you and I, so I got rid of her.  You reminded me of her back there just now, she also begged for her life.”

“No…” Rey whispered, shaking her head.  “You’re lying.  You’re trying to make me angry so that I can use the dark force.”

“Perhaps I am… but it doesn’t make it any less true,” he taunted.

“LIAR!”

“Search my mind then, Rey.  Go on… do you want to see it in my memories?  Do you want to see her beg for her life?  I think you’ll be shocked at your resemblance.  I killed my own father for this cause, do you think I would spare your mother out of pity?!”

The sick feeling in the pit of her stomach evaporated, as the rage blossomed in her heart.  She could feel the dark force flowing into her.  Her hand, which only seconds before had been shaking uncontrollably, was now steady as she gripped the hilt of her light saber.  She could feel the power in her fingertips and toes.  It was ancient and chaotic, and tore through her like flame touched to paper.  It occurred her to her that she probably didn’t need her light saber, that she could simply lift her hand and send that power racing toward him, that she could and would crush Kylo Ren into a fine dust.

But before she could do so, he disappeared, and the sky shattered into a billion grains of glittering sand that rained down upon her.  The forest exploded into ash and as the dust settled… as it settled she realized that she stood in a rounded chamber of shining black metal which throbbed with power.  To her right, were the doors they had entered by, she was only a few steps from them.  On her other side, Kylo Ren knelt with his arms outstretched, holding what appeared to be an invisible weight.  His head was bent over the thing she could not see and he whispered to it as he rocked back and forth.

Before her was a black throne on a raised dais, and upon that throne sat the decaying clone body of Snoke.

Though ‘sat’ was perhaps too generous a term for it, she realized.  Wide metal bands, which at first she took for restraints, circled his shins and waist—she quickly realized that they were securing his weak, corpse-like form in place.  Black tubing hung down from the ceiling connecting to his shoulders, and points behind his back that she could not see.  She did see that the tubes were moving some sort of fluid in and out of the body.  His head hung limply, and for a moment, she wondered if he were already dead, but then he lifted his head to stare at her.

“Welcome,” he hissed.  “Welcome, Rey of Jakku.  I have been waiting so long to meet you.”

His gaze shifted to where Kylo knelt on the floor, still holding tightly to his invisible burden as he rocked.

“Pathetic, isn’t he?” Snoke’s voice was a threatening whisper.

“Stop it!” Rey ordered.  “Whatever you’re doing to him, stop it now!”

“No,” Snoke said simply.  “He’s so weak… so easily tempted.  How I’ve managed with only him for all these years…. well, best not dwell on the past.  I have no use for him now.  Would you like to know what he sees?  Would you like to know Kylo Ren’s greatest fear?”

“I’d like to kill you,” Rey answered.

“You can try,” Snoke agreed, pressing his withered lips together in what appeared to be a smile.

Gritting her teeth, Rey raised her arm and allowed the dark power to flow out.  She envisioned it winding its way around his body and crushing it into chunks of rotten flesh.

Snoke gasped, and then gave a wheezy laugh as he waved one hand limply. 

“Good.  That was good!  You are powerful.  Not as powerful as I, but impressive none-the-less.  With training, I believe you will become the strongest Sith in one hundred generations.”

“With training?  You… train me?  I will NEVER call you master.  I will NEVER be a Sith!”

“You were MADE to be a receptacle for dark force energy.  Do you not realize it yet?  When have you ever felt this much power before?  Certainly not under Luke Skywalker.  He lied to you. He tried to keep the truth of your nature from you, he wanted only to bind your powers so that you could never use them, but I will train you to wield your powers fully.  I will teach you to—“

I will NEVER be a Sith!” she repeated.

“Is that so?  You stand there full of hatred, full of rage and the need to kill… you stand there bursting with the power of the dark side and you call yourself, what exactly?  Not a jedi, I hope!” he gave another sickly wheeze that she supposed was a laugh.

“I call myself Rey,” she growled, igniting her light saber as she stalked toward him.

She was immediately blown backwards by a powerful burst of energy.

She glanced up in time to see Snoke’s face contorted with effort.  Beside her, Kylo gasped and looked up.  He made eye contact with Rey and then glanced fearfully back at the invisible thing he held.  He looked at her again and his arms fell slowly to his side.

“Welcome back,” she growled.  “I could use a little help!”

“My apprentice!” Snoke greeted him.  “So good of you to join us!  Now say good-bye!”

Kylo’s body stiffened and jerked as he cried out in pain.

“NO!” Rey screamed, releasing another bolt of energy.  Kylo's response was immediate.  He leapt to his feet and lit his blade.  He ran towards the dais, and was then thrown to the side as though bouncing off of a wall.  Rey breathed in, drawing the dark force of the meditation sphere inside herself.

“No!” Kylo snapped.  “From him!  Not from the sphere, take it from him!”

Rey nodded and lifted her arm, curling her fingers slowly into a fist.  She could feel Snoke’s power, she could feel it as she drew it towards herself.  It was distinctly different from the ancient and chaotic darkness around them.  Snoke’s power came with the taint of death.  The rot of his clone body, and the pain of his many mortal deaths stung her even as his power slowly filled her.

Snoke gave a feral growl and she could feel it being pulled back out of her.  For a moment she was tempted to let him take it.  His power was a poison.  It would destroy any vessel it tried to fill.  But then she saw Kylo, on his feet again and running at the dais.  She pulled back, concentrating on ripping everything she could from him.

Again she could feel the power filling her, but this power burned!  It burned like acid from her fingers to her toes and her mouth was full of the taste of rot.

“NO!” Snoke growled, but he had already lost too much.  When he raised his hand to Kylo, the knight simply swerved to the side and pivoted back.  Snoke tightened his hand into a fist, and lightening shot from his clenched hand, striking Kylo’s face and arm.  It was too late.  Kylo was already bringing the lightsaber down when he struck, and the blade sliced directly through the skull of Supreme Leader Snoke.

There came a roar as the body fell apart like an overcooked roast, and Rey was again thrown off her feet.

She had won the tug of war, but now the dark power rushed into her without her willing it, and it burned.  Every inch of her skin was on fire.  She could taste bile and smoke.  She was shaking violently, convulsing and writhing on the floor.  She felt her body could at any minute explode.

“REY!”

Kylo grabbed her by the shoulders, struggling to hold on to her seizuring form.

“Let it out, Rey!  You have to let it out.  If you hold on to this much it will kill you.  Release it!”

If she could have spoken, she would have told him that she wasn’t holding on to anything, that she was basically being ripped apart from the inside without her consent.

“LET IT OUT!” he screamed. His hands wrapped tightly around her shoulders and he gave her a hard shake.

He was panicking, she realized.  His eyes wide, his scar visible now against the deathly pallor of his face—he was afraid.

He moved his hands to the sides of her head, and she could feel them shaking with effort.  He was squeezing her… he was going to crush her skull… but then she could feel that same pressure across her entire body.  She understood.  He was trying to force Snoke’s energy out of her.

Rey pushed, bearing down on the burning sensation in her stomach.  She closed her eyes tightly, groaning with effort.

“Get out! GET OUT!” she seethed through clenched teeth.

The power exploded from her.  She could feel it burning as it went. The chamber shook.  The tubing fell from the ceiling and black fluid sprayed from the loose ends.  A distant rumble from beyond the doors suggested that the ancient ruins were soon to crumble around them.

Kylo slid his arms beneath her and quickly lifted her, adjusting her weight as he straightened.

Rey tried to be afraid of being buried alive, but decided that the effort it took to be afraid was perhaps too great, and then everything went black.

She faded in and out as he ran, and her memories from this point on were not so clear.   Many months later she would remember a brief moment of being annoyed that her head was bouncing around so much, and then darkness, and then Kylo ordering her not to die, and then darkness, and then the smash of falling rock, and then darkness, and then perhaps it was stairs, or climbing, and then darkness, and then waking up to vomit and realizing that what came up was her own blood, and then darkness.

Her very last memory, however, was completely clear.  She lay on the ground and Kylo was bent over her.  Behind him, she could see the fire red sky of Korriban.  Her entire body was wracked with pain, but where his hands rested on her stomach, she felt a strange warmth.  He was muttering something in a tone too low for her to hear.  His face was drawn and tired, though his eyes were still those of a wild, frightened animal. A shout came from somewhere far off and his head snapped up in response.  He looked down at her and realized that she was staring back.

And for a long moment they said nothing, just stared at one another.  His lips parted, and Rey tensed.  He would say it.  He was going to say the words she wanted most to hear… but instead he swallowed hard.  And then…

“Good-bye, Rey,” he whispered.

And he was gone.

She was alone, abandoned on Korriban, and when the darkness came again it stayed for a long, long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter guys, and this arc is finished. Can't believe it's taken this long, lol.


	25. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you believe it? I bet you thought I'd never finish it, but here it is, the very last chapter!! Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you for reading. Thank-you for your kudos and comments and recs. I never would have finished if I hadn't received a little nudge in the comments from time to time ;) Also, check out the end of chapter notes for more info on Part 2! (Of course there's a part two!)

Master Luke was there when she woke.

She drew a deep breath, raised one weak finger and poked him in the shoulder as hard as she could.  He winced.

“Nice reaction.  Still know you’re not real,” she muttered darkly.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were drunk,” he growled.

“Where am I?” she asked, attempting to sit up. He placed the palm of his hand against her forehead and pushed her back down.  As the room began to spin, she decided to stay where she was—wherever that was.

Chewie gave a concerned cry from somewhere beyond her range of vision and the familiar smell of the Falcon registered when she heard his voice.

“Oh good.  Great.  What now?  I suppose Chewie is going to sprout a second head and come raging back here to rip my arm off!”

Luke’s brow furrowed as he studied her.                                                                               

“You’re confused.  Your brain must have been damaged,” he decided.

“You sound exactly like you, but still—you’re not you,” she informed him.

“She’s awake?”

Finn’s face appeared over Master’s Luke’s shoulder.

“He’s awake?” Rey repeated the question.

“You’ve been gone a long time!” Finn rushed excitedly, pushing past Master Luke to kneel beside her bunk.  “Everyone was worried, but I KNEW, I knew you’d be alright.  You always find a way out and I told the General—“

“She’s awake?!  Should I get the medic?  Does she need the medic?”

Another face, one Rey didn’t recognize squeezed between Luke’s grave and Finn’s happy one.  This one belonged to a black-haired girl with bright eyes and an excited grin.

“Rey, this is Rose—“ Finn began to explain.

“Does she need a medic?  I AM technically the medic still, right?”

“Brick!” Rey gasped, as MT-5927 pushed his way through the small crowd.  “But how did you… how… where…”

“Long story,” Finn laughed.

“Good Story though!” Rose interrupted.

“How do you think they found you?” Brick grinned.

“I found you, actually!” Finn announced.  “You were in bad shape and—“

“— should have seen what was happening to the First Order stormtroopers out there!  What a mess!  They were fighting each other at one point, and Master Luke said—“

“—told them you were a friend of mine.  Didn’t tell them about the whiskey though, so don’t worry about that—“

“—and then there was an explosion!”

“— fighting these giant beasts with fangs—I was so scared!”

“—the door burst open and I thought I was done for but—“

Their voices became a cacophony of excited words that barely made sense to her.  Master Luke had lapsed into silence and was massaging his forehead with his hand.  She knew that pose.  That was the pose he made when he was close to losing his temper.  She was home.  It was real this time.

“Where’s Kylo?” she interrupted.

The words stopped.  Their faces registered shock and something else—something she couldn’t put her finger on.  They glanced between each other and then to Master Luke who lifted his hand slowly.

“You were all very concerned about Rey,” he began in calming tones.  “You’re happy she’s awake, but you’ve suddenly remembered you have pressing matters elsewhere.”

“I was very concerned about you, Rey.  I’m happy you’re awake, but I’ve suddenly remembered I have pressing matters elsewhere,” they chorused in unison.

Rey managed a weak smile as the three shuffled away.

“But I—“ Finn turned around, his brow furrowed in confusion.

“Have pressing matters elsewhere,” Master Luke repeated.

“Right… pressing matters,” Finn agreed, nodding his head.

Master Luke gave an agitated sigh as Finn left the room.  He was impatient with people at the best of times.  Perhaps he had always been, or perhaps it was due to his long years of isolation on Ahch-to, she did not know, but it made her feel just the slightest bit better to see him so unchanged.  He would, perhaps, not find her so.

“Kylo?” she repeated, lowering her voice.  “Where is he?”

“Escaped,” Master Luke said, and glanced away from her.

“Escaped?  Master, we were wrong about him!  He killed Snoke, and saved my life, and he has… he has the ability to care… a great deal even.  He’s not dark--- well, no, he IS dark, but not… not all dark…” Rey tried to explain.

Master Luke was rubbing his forehead again, and he was still avoiding eye contact with her.

“Please, I’m telling you the truth—we have to find him.  General Organa will be so—“

“You were damaged on Korriban, Rey,” Master Luke began.  He was choosing his words slowly and carefully.

“Not by him, it was Snoke.  He—“

“Rey… Finn found you by chance.  He recognized Kylo Ren’s personal transporter as it was leaving, and noticed that it had landed far off from the other First Order transporters.  He was suspicious and had the foresight to check around that area.  Kylo Ren walked on board that ship and left you discarded on the ground—and make no mistake, you were dying when you were found.”

“He must have known that I would—“

“That you would be found?  His transport landed on the other side of the valley, far off from where the fighting was, and I cannot stress this enough, Rey-- you were very clearly dying.  I know how alluring the dark side can be.  I know the seductive promises it uses to lure its followers to it.  I know, but you were so full of dark power that it was destroying you, poisoning your very life force.  The ground turned black around you.  I can sense that poison in you still, even now.”

“He didn’t make me do it, Master, I chose—“

“You really believe that it was all your own decision, I know.  Now you’ll tell me that it was simply a means to an end.  You thought that you could wield the dark force once, because you were in dire need, and then set it down, but that’s not how it works.  That’s never how it works.”

Rey heaved a frustrated sigh and cast about mentally for some way to make him understand.

“Snoke was Emperor Palpatine!” she announced.  “You didn’t know, did you?  He survived.  His body was destroyed by Darth Vader, but not his spirit.  He found a way to survive.  He attached his spirit to a clone body but the bodies are constantly destroyed and he was weak—so he used the Dark Moon.  The Dark Moon was a ship… it… it had… I don’t know how to explain it… a meditation sphere, he called it… and it was… was… there were mass delusions and that’s why on all these planets people were… they killed each other, and—and— he did that to us… we had to fight through our own heads, but we did it, and he… with his light saber he…. But in order for him to get close enough to Snoke, I had to… well, I had to take in all of that dark energy.  Kylo figured all this out, he planned this, and it took him years and years, don’t you see?  Don’t you see that there WAS good in him?  All this he did to defeat Snoke, to… you understand, don’t you?” She demanded, but even as she tried to explain, she could see the retreat in Master Luke’s eyes and realized that she was sounding more and more crazed and incoherent.

She drew a shaky breath and could feel the tears welling in her eyes.

“He didn’t leave me to die, he… he wouldn’t do that,” she insisted, placing her hand upon Master Luke’s.

Master Luke glanced down at her hand, his expression grim.

“I felt him pass—Snoke.  There was a great upheaval in the Force, and I knew.  So I believe you that he is dead, and if you say that Kylo Ren killed him, then I believe that it was Kylo Ren who killed him, but if you want me to believe that Kylo Ren killed Snoke because he is in some way still clinging to the Light, and that everything he did was simply to rid the galaxy of a great evil, then I cannot agree.  I cannot.  He is a murderer of children, of innocents, of his own father.  He killed Snoke, very well, but he killed him so that he himself could step into the vacuum of power that was left behind.”

“No.  No, he—“

“He has taken command of the First Order troops.  You have been asleep for some time, Rey.”

“There must be… some reason… he could have left me in the temple.  He carried me—“

“Until he realized that you would likely not survive.  You were useful to him.  He trained you, used you to minimize his risk and when he realized that you would be too difficult to save, he abandoned you to die.”

“That’s not what… no,” she whispered, shaking her head slowly.

“We are fleeing D’Qar, even as we speak.  Heading for an old rebel base in the outer rim that he might not know about.  Do you know who sent those troops to D’Qar to destroy us?”

Rey was silent for a moment.

“Kylo.”

“Yes.  It will take time, Rey.  I understand that.  I know that you have been through an ordeal, that not just your body, but your mind has been poisoned.  You will heal.  You will come to see things by their rightful natures again.  I understand if you can’t accept this now, but I know how strong you are, and I know you will come back to the light.”

“What if my true nature is dark?  I can do things with the dark force that no one else can.  I’m afraid that I’m stronger there than I’ll ever be in the light no matter how hard I try,” she whispered, remembering Snoke’s last words to her.

“People aren’t born light or dark, Rey.  You either have the strength of will to keep doing what is right, even if sometimes you fail, or you don’t.”

“Do or do not, there is no try,” she remembered.

“Yes,” he agreed, and his weary expression softened with the hint of a smile.  “Rest now.  We’ll land soon, and there are many people who will want to see you.  I can’t distract Leia as easily as I can your friends.”

Rey nodded, though her thoughts were still with Kylo Ren.  Perhaps on Korriban he had sensed Finn’s approach and knew that she had a better shot healing with the Resistance, but still, why take control of the First Order?  What was his plan now that Snoke was gone? What had happened to make him attack a resistance base?  And was it possible that Master Luke might be correct?  Could she trust her own feelings anymore?

“Wait!” she called after him, her thoughts catching up to his words.  “Speaking of my friends, what is Brick doing here?”

“Ah…” Master Luke smirked.  “Resistance spies picked up a First Order transmission.  A message stating that Kylo Ren was sending a very dangerous prisoner-- a resistance fighter-- under guard to the Finalizer.  We thought we’d had an incredible stroke of luck, as we assumed it was you.  The transporter carrying the prisoner was ambushed and your friends stormed aboard expecting to find you, but instead—“

“But instead, they found Brick,” she guessed.

“Yes.  There were… disappointed, but your medic turned out to be more useful than we anticipated.  He had seen you, and had overheard Kylo Ren’s plans to take you to Korriban.  That was how we knew where you would be.”

Rey did her best to keep the realization from her face, yet she instantly remembered the way Kylo had known that the Resistance would come to occupy the First Order for them.  The Resistance did not learn about the prisoner by chance, and Brick over-hearing Kylo’s plans was no stroke of luck.  Kylo had moved them all as if they were no more than pieces on his own personal holochess board.

“I’ll rest now,” she agreed.

But though she closed her eyes, she did not sleep.  She had already slept long enough for her allies and enemies to change places around her and now she was not at all sure which was which.  Kylo Ren was in control of the First Order—but to what purpose?  Did he think her dead?  Were they disconnected somehow?  He had always been able to speak to her through dreams—ever since she was a child, but she had slept a long time and could not remember even a whisper from him.

She lay very still for a long while, listening to the hum of the engines and the occasional rattle of the loose wall panel Chewie still had not fixed.  When she heard footsteps crossing the lounge toward her, she did not have to open her eyes to recognize Finn.  He stopped beside the bunk for a moment, which drew the attention of Master Luke.

“She’s sleeping again?” Finn asked, disappointment evident in his voice.

“She’ll need a great deal of rest yet.  Her body is healing slowly,” Master Luke explained.

“There was so much I wanted to say! So much I wanted to ask too!”

“There will be time for all that soon enough,” Master Luke.

“Are you going to tell Leia?” Finn asked.

Master Luke did not answer right away.  When he did, his words were careful.

“Tell Leia what exactly?” he asked.

“That he was trying to heal her.  I mean—yeah, Brick says he didn’t do a very good job of it, and it didn’t help much, but isn’t that light-forcey-magic-type-stuff?  You know—the stuff that bad guys can’t do?” Finn pushed.

“My sister’s son killed his father.  He murdered my students.  You yourself have seen him order the execution of an entire village of innocent people.  He gutted the Resistance, destroying our base and almost killing her in the process.  All that, and still, she so desperately wants to save him, that holding out a tiny breadcrumb of hope to her—such as he MIGHT have tried to use a light force power and not have failed entirely—to do that, would be a great cruelty,” Luke explained in calm voice.  “Forget that you know it.”

“I can’t,” Finn complained, though his tone was good-natured.  “And if you tell me I have pressing matters to attend to elsewhere, now that no one else is around, I might disagree with you!”

Master Luke huffed at this, and began to threaten Finn with a myriad of other ways he might be persuaded to keep his mouth shut, but his tone had also become light-hearted, and the two were already crossing the room together, presumably to leave her in peace.

And she was in peace, because, like Leia, she would always rather have that breadcrumb of hope than none at all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished it, my very first piece of fanfiction ever! Thank you for reading. If you enjoyed it, please leave a kudos or a comment, let me know what worked well for you-- or maybe didn't work so well. I've already begun outlining Part 2. It's title will be: 'The Gray Knights', and I hope to have a first chapter out very soon. (A little sad this one is over, but kind of excited to get started on a new arc to this story.)


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